I upset my Form Tutor yesterday. How do I make up for it?

[Marlena403]

If you've read "I've done bad things at school. What should I do now?", you'll probably know what I'm talking about.

Yesterday in Registration, I punched a boy from 9Red multiple times. When I was told off by my Pastoral Leader in Period 4, I heard that I did something else as well.

Today in Registration, my Form Tutor gave me a green detention card and sent me to AG15 (the office). I showed my Directour of Learning and a Deputy Headteacher a green detention card. Later, my Directour of Learning spoke to me about my behaviour in yesterday's first three lessons. I asked him about what I did in Registration and it turned out that I HUGGED MY FORM TUTOR DURNIG CIRCLE TIME. She doesn't like it, so she told my Pastoral Leader and my Pastoral Leader told my Directour of Learning. The C3 detention was only for my behaviour in English class though. Not for hugging my Form Tutor.

My first lesson was Key Skills, so I went there crying. I was too sad to do any homework exactly because of what I did to my Form Tutor.

My Directour of Learning told me earlier that it's not just her that I'm not allowed to hug. It's all teachers, including those who I know won't mind. I'll find that hard because hugged my art teacher two times in Year 7, once in Year 8 and a few times in Year 9. I didn't use to get in trouble for hugging teachers until yesterday. I think this is a new rule and my Pastoral Leader has something to do with this.

Anyway, Period 2 was Science. We had to move to AF20 (ICT Room) as we had to do work on Kerboodle. I remember one day when this naughty boy tried to hack into my account. So I changed my Kerboodle password on the same day and that boy changed his name to my favourite English teacher's name and the number of messages to one million. Now when I look back to it, I think one day I'll get in trouble with both of my science teachers, not because of forgetting it, but because of changing it. Anyway, instead of doing the work, I searched for "Student hugs Form Tutor" and tried editing some school photos on Photoshop, but ran out of time.

At breaktime, I tried jumping out of a window to kill myself, but the window didn't want to open the way it should. All because I upset my Form Tutor yesterday.

In Period 3 we were supposed to watch Macbeth. And I couldn't watch because others were chatting and throwing things. Plus two teachers were hiding the screen (one of them was a math teacher and a teacher who creates timetables while the other one was my Pastoral Leader). The boy who hacks Kerboodle and MyMaths even told me to shut up and get cancer. I was absolutely silent when he said that. HE was the one talking. Another boy even swore at me and I swore back in Albanian. My English teacher wasn't in, so I at least didn't have to go to after school detention today. I still had the lunchtime detention.

In double History, I wrote a note about the worst thing I did. Which is hugging my Form Tutor. I wrote that I hugged her, she doesn't like it, that I'm the worst student ever because I hugged her and that I'll live with that forever. I drew Anime later on.

I wish I knew better. How do I make up for what I've done?

I guess I really AM the worst student ever. I know that even my teachers said I'm not, but I actually am. Good students don't upset teachers, especially if they like them.

[Marlena403]

Update: Two months later I stared tying my hands up in Circle Time. My classmates kept telling me that the only way to prevent myself from hugging my Form Tutor is sitting next to someone other than her and making sure it's not my FEMALE co-tutor (I have one male co-tutor and one female co-tutor). I ignored them because I wanted to sit next to one of them. My co-tutor (The female one) got really annoyed when she saw me with my hands tied up. I think that's because she didn't see me hugging my Form Tutor because she was outside with a girl who was upset. I also stopped reporting incidents because I thought no one would take me seriously after I hugged my Form Tutor. After Easter, I was told to forget about the day I hugged her. I can't. If I do, I will hug her again. What I did to her was not just inappropriate or embarrassing, but also nasty. I still see myself as the worst student ever and still feel bad about what I did. I don't know how to prevent myself from hugging my Form Tutor without annoing my co-tutor or sitting away from both of them.

[James Comey]

Again, I never hugged a teacher in school...