Confused

[Confusion101]

Hi,

I dot really know where to put this so I put it here

I'm in grade 6 and now is a bad time. People are starting to know bad things and bad words and have bad habits. My 2 friends were both bullied before and so was I. It's come back to haunt us. My friend is getting cyberbullied by another girl in our grade and a guy who used to be my friend now calls me gay and says me and my best friend or gay with each other. I will be honest, I am a in-the-closet-bisexual I think so its awkward when he says i am gay as a joke. I'm not sure if it is true bullying because it is not really constant but it is bad enough I feel scared. Is it bullying? He jokes with how friends and calls them gay but when they say stop he does. When I do he doesn't. I need help because I can imagine it getting worse now that he has my phone number.

Please help

[James Comey]

If he has your phone number, ask your parents to change it. That's what you should do immediately. As much as I hate saying this, the best thing you can do is just ignore him. He'll probably move on.

Also, don't be afraid to tell that cyberbully to fuck off. Don't go too strong or else the school district will probably suspend you because of "zero tolerance". Tell her that you know that she is bullying your friend. Don't be afraid to use reverse psychology as well.

[Confusion101]

(11-14-2013 11:26 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  If he has your phone number, ask your parents to change it. That's what you should do immediately. As much as I hate saying this, the best thing you can do is just ignore him. He'll probably move on.

Also, don't be afraid to tell that cyberbully to fuck off. Don't go too strong or else the school district will probably suspend you because of "zero tolerance". Tell her that you know that she is bullying your friend. Don't be afraid to use reverse psychology as well.

Thanks

About the cyberbully part I... I can't because this person is super mean. If I were to do that she would have the whole school against me........ I'm texting my friend now talking about it. I might finally tell her about me being bullied but I am embarrassed because it sounds pathetic being hurt by someone calling me gay, it happens all the time and others just laugh it off

[James Comey]

What kind of cyber bullying is this?

It's possible to simply block them on whatever social network site the bully is using. If this is by cell phone, then once again, ask your friend to change their number. You'd probably piss your bully off, but they'll eventually realize that you and your friend will not respond to her. I seriously doubt she'd get the whole school against you simply for blocking her, but then again, school hierarchy.

[Confusion101]

(11-14-2013 11:39 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  What kind of cyber bullying is this?

It's possible to simply block them on whatever social network site the bully is using. If this is by cell phone, then once again, ask your friend to change their number. You'd probably piss your bully off, but they'll eventually realize that you and your friend will not respond to her. I seriously doubt she'd get the whole school against you simply for blocking her, but then again, school hierarchy.

Let me put it this way

At he start of the year my friends and I couldn't care less about what people thought about us. We still don't be we are aware we are being punished for it. We are pretty much stereotyped as the 'scene' whatever it means. The girl tells he to kill herself and other things I don't even know about. I think she will block them and we will try to either ignore the girl tomorrow or stand up which I am not good at doing because I am not really intimidating.

Thanks for your help

[James Comey]

Maybe you could use some help for that:
http://www.itchyflight.com/mean-insults-...-good.html
http://www.graphicdesignforum.com/forum/...d750ab6fde

[James Comey]

By the way, I'm going to assume you're in middle school in the United States.

DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT GRADES!

Cannot stress that enough. Colleges don't give a shit about your grades in elementary or middle school. Just get a passing grade and you'll be fine when it comes to grades.

[Fucking Yellow Cunt]

You are gay though? At least you don't label yourself pansexual.

[Gwedin]

"scene". I've heard that term before. My understanding (don't quote me here) of it is a kid who listens to post-hardcore, screamo, emo, etc. music, and dresses in "rebel" clothes or whatever. AFAIK there might be some make-up mixed in there.

But seriously. Block dat mofo however you can. The less attention you give the bully the less attention they'll give you. As a former Internet troll I can say from experience.

Also, you'd think people would have better insults than calling another "gay". It's been overused to the point where I want to stick a needle in the eye of anyone who uses it out of context. Hey, there's an idea...

[brainiac3397]

Shut up gay. Stop being so gay you gay gay. oh gaayyy.

Question: Can you really fully tell your sexuality in only sixth grade? I know some realize that they are different, but can they fully understand or is it simply psychological pressure making them think it?(such as verbal abuse by bullies)

My solution to cyber bullying has always been ignore online comments or abuse, then meet person in real life and sock them in the face or often the nuts. Then say "cyberbully this, bitch". Just the threat of it often kept people at bay

[Ky]

First of all, I apologize for the lack of sanity this forum has, and must warn you that I do not possess any either.

Secondly, I know what it's like to be relentlessly bullied, probably unlike anyone else who has posted here. While it might be common advice to stand up to the bully, it probably won't work at this stage in the game. There is no room for heroism in middle school - nearly everyone is teased to some degree there. Revenge is a dish best not served at this point, especially.

The best thing you can do is keep a low profile. Don't give any bullies the satisfaction; ignore them as best you can, do not reply to their taunts, and don't do anything that would paint a target onto yourself. It might hurt, but in the long run it is the best way to come out unscathed. (I'm sure you already know this, but the worst thing you can do is tell a teacher - it will solve nothing.)

[brainiac3397]

True. The only ones who should engage in violent resistance is the one who enjoys doing it regardless of consequences. Some just find it exciting to ambush a foe and catch the look of surprise and anger on their face as you pummel them with a textbook...

[Gwedin]

(11-15-2013 07:30 AM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  True. The only ones who should engage in violent resistance is the one who enjoys doing it regardless of consequences. Some just find it exciting to ambush a foe and catch the look of surprise and anger on their face as you pummel them with a textbook...

What's with you and your fetish of beating people with textbooks?

[SoulRiser]

Yup, that's definitely bullying.

Cyberbullying should at least be easier to get rid of... just block the bastards. IRL though, there's no 'block' button. I wish there was, though.

[brainiac3397]

(11-15-2013 07:33 PM)Gwedin Wrote:  

(11-15-2013 07:30 AM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  True. The only ones who should engage in violent resistance is the one who enjoys doing it regardless of consequences. Some just find it exciting to ambush a foe and catch the look of surprise and anger on their face as you pummel them with a textbook...

What's with you and your fetish of beating people with textbooks?

Well. Im up for beating people with any blunt object. Not so much fists unless you've properly turned your fist knuckles into steel through use.

Its just my insane nature of possessing opposites. Im as peaceful as Im violent. So the more violent I am, the more peaceful I am. Plus I rarely engage in fights though Ill enjoy it if I do. Must be why I never got into much fights...

[Gwedin]

(11-16-2013 04:00 PM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  

(11-15-2013 07:33 PM)Gwedin Wrote:  

(11-15-2013 07:30 AM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  True. The only ones who should engage in violent resistance is the one who enjoys doing it regardless of consequences. Some just find it exciting to ambush a foe and catch the look of surprise and anger on their face as you pummel them with a textbook...

What's with you and your fetish of beating people with textbooks?

Well. Im up for beating people with any blunt object. Not so much fists unless you've properly turned your fist knuckles into steel through use.

Its just my insane nature of possessing opposites. Im as peaceful as Im violent. So the more violent I am, the more peaceful I am. Plus I rarely engage in fights though Ill enjoy it if I do. Must be why I never got into much fights...

I've never been in a fight. But to be honest if I were to get involved in one I think I would do fairly well. I've seen other people fighting and they're really sloppy and slow or they lack any sort of technique. People always seem to just exchange punches (stupid) or go for a headlock (even stupider).

I wonder how it'd feel to blugeon someone to death...

[brainiac3397]

From what I've seen of real fights, both video and not, a lot of people are often fearful and not as ferocious. I term it "fight confidence".

I remember seeing a video of a martial arts expert being approached by a pissed off guy on the street, and you can tell the expert was pretty confident of his ability to kick ass. As the untrained guy approached him to punch, the expert kicked the guy in the guts and karate chopped him in the head.

People just don't take initiative. If you get into a fight, you might as well go all in. Let out the inner beast and beat the crap out of your enemy. Also...don't stop and start talking about "I don't want to fight you" or "Let's stop", because they'll just use it to get the upper hand.

Well...at least I acknowledge my seemingly natural urge to bludgeon people, and don't fear it. If you don't acknowledge a natural trait, or know it but fear it, you'll lose your control over it.

[xcriteria]

First, Confusion101, welcome to the forums. Beyond the bullying problem, what do you like? What are your interests, and are there things that make life better when you aren't dealing with the bullying issue?

Second, these questions come up a lot, and I'd like to advocate for finding better ways to deal with bullying than just fighting back or putting up with it. It's generally a good idea to talk to parents, teachers, and administrators about problems like these. At least let them know what's happening, and see if they can do anything about the problem. Depending on your situation, it could be the easiest fix and a good backup plan.

As for what you can do yourself, we had a big discussion about this in this other thread on bullying, I might be in a fight. You might want to read that and share any thoughts you have either there or here. The basic question is, how does one deal with bullies?

My idea might seem impractical, but I always want to know why. Why are these people bullying or harrassing? Who are they? What do they like? Are they just horrible people, or have they picked up the equivalent of a bad habit that maybe they could change? School, and just growing up can be tough or empty for people, and some respond by being mean. I'd say, ask why they're doing what they're doing. See what they might like to do instead.

Ideally some authority figure could come in and do that... figure out what's going on. Too often, people don't learn to think about their actions. Fighting back or punishing them might or might not help. Ignoring them might or might not help. But if they learn to ask why they're being mean, maybe some of them would stop.

Just an idea.

What do you think? Any more news on this?