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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.
I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.
I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.
I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.
I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.
Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.
Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.
-SoulRiser
The forums are mostly read-only and are in a maintenance/testing phase, before being permanently archived. Please use this time to get the contact details of people you'd like to keep in touch with. My contact details are here.
Please do not make a mirror copy of the forums in their current state - things will still change, and some people have requested to be able to edit or delete some of their personal info.
Quote:A Bakersfield man with a history of drug abuse remained jailed Monday after allegedly biting out one of his 4-year-old son's eyes and mutilating the other.
Angel Vidal Mendoza, 34, has been charged with mayhem, torture, child cruelty and inflicting an injury to a child in the alleged attack on his son, Angelo Mendoza Jr. Bakersfield police said in a search warrant that the child told investigators "my daddy ate my eyes" and that Mendoza appeared to be under the influence of PCP following the April 28 incident.
After two neighbors found the injured child in the apartment he shared with his father, witnesses told authorities that a man in a wheelchair who turned out to be Mendoza was in the backyard of a nearby vacant home hacking his own legs with an ax, police said. Mendoza was arrested a week later.
Kern County Jail officials said they did not know whether he had hired an attorney, and online court records do not indicate whether he is represented. Mendoza is scheduled to appear in court Wednesday, when a date for a preliminary hearing in the case is expected to be set.
Doctors at Mercy Hospital, where the boy is being treated, said it is unclear whether Angelo will regain vision in his right eye or be permanently blinded.
The case has raised questions about whether the child was being adequately monitored by Kern County's Child Protective Services department. Mendoza and the child's 23-year-old mother were charged with being under the influence of PCP in 2006 and pleaded no contest to child cruelty charges in that case, court records show.
Police said the mother, Desirae Marie Bermudez, was not present when the child's eyes were injured. There is a $15,000 warrant for her arrest for failing to complete a drug treatment program last year, according to court documents.
Mendoza has a criminal record going back to 1997 that includes convictions for selling alcohol to a minor, battery and check forgery.
............................. I really cant begin to say how awful... I really dont know what to say other than that is just truly fucked up in the head....
05-21-2009 02:41 AM
Thanks given by:
SoulRiser
Site Founder
Posts: 18,240
Joined: Aug 2001
Support School Survival on Patreon or Donate Bitcoin Here: 1Q5WCcxWjayniaL92b8GfXBiGdfjmnUNa2 "Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide "The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein "I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder
Jesus. Just... plain Jesus. WTF was wrong with the guy? (Yes, I know he was on drugs, but PCP makes you see shit not kill your son)
"After 2001, the only Bush I trust is my own" - Bumper Sticker
"In my world, everybody's a pony. They eat rainbows and poop butterflies. AHHHHHHH" - Katie
"In my world, everybody's a computer. They eat Ethernet cables and poop USB drives" - Sick Silent
"If Wikipedia's a lie, then the whole world is a lie"
▲
▲ ▲ got triforce?
05-21-2009 03:05 AM
Thanks given by:
SoulRiser
Site Founder
Posts: 18,240
Joined: Aug 2001
Support School Survival on Patreon or Donate Bitcoin Here: 1Q5WCcxWjayniaL92b8GfXBiGdfjmnUNa2 "Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide "The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein "I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder
Quote:After two neighbors found the injured child in the apartment he shared with his father, witnesses told authorities that a man in a wheelchair who turned out to be Mendoza was in the backyard of a nearby vacant home hacking his own legs with an ax, police said. Mendoza was arrested a week later.
DAMN fine police work officers, damn fine....
I AM A THIEF IN THE NIGHT I WILL SAVE AS MANY AS I CAN
"A 'no' uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a 'yes' merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble." - Mahatma Gandhi
"The irrationality of a thing is no argument against its existence, rather a condition of it."
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
-Ben Franklin
"when I was a kid I used to pray for a bicycle. then I realized that god doesn't work that way. so I stole one and prayed for forgiveness."
"I would rather die for something I believe in than live for anything else."
"What is the task of higher education? To make a man into a machine. What are the means employed? He is taught how to suffer being bored." – F W Nietzsche
Zherneboh Wrote:I hope the kid gets his vision back, I really do.
Quote:After two neighbors found the injured child in the apartment he shared with his father, witnesses told authorities that a man in a wheelchair who turned out to be Mendoza was in the backyard of a nearby vacant home hacking his own legs with an ax, police said. Mendoza was arrested a week later.
THIS is why you don't do mind bending drugs.
THIS is why tripping out on hallucinogens is a bad idea.
The sad thing is, the first I heard about it was in Biology class,
During a lecture on why we SHOULDN'T SMOKE POT. Not why we shouldn't do PCP or LSD or METH, but pot.
Teachers win the award for how to turn a horrific incident into a bullshit scaring technique to use on teens.
Goddamnit, I'm sick of hearing how teens shouldn't do drugs, of being shown videos about guys who got cancer from marijuana, shit like that,
Because adults like this sick fuck who ate his own kid's eye are the ones who need to watch the video, take the classes, be monitored. I'm in high school and I've NEVER met someone who smokes marijuana.
So stop sayin it's the kids fault and take care of the psychopaths like this who are killing themselves and the people around them.
An it Harm None, Do What Ye Will
An it Harm, Do Only What Ye Must
Lighten up! This life was made for experimenting, making mistakes, falling on our faces, and standing up to do it all over again.
Live for Learning.
Carla Franklin may be a whore. She may be a wonderful, kind, moral woman. Seeing as I don't know her personally, I cannot know for sure. However, I find her actions (suing Google, requesting the personal info of her critics, getting angry over random internet idiocy that she should ignore and be bigger than, trying to get this site in trouble because of a few users' commentary on the situation, etc.) pretty ridiculous and unwarranted. If she didn't want people to to be talking about/judging her, well 1. that's impossible, she's a human, and 2. she shouldn't have been a model or agreed to be on film. AND 3. she DEFINITELY shouldn't have sued Google and made all this fuss over a few random idiots whom she probably won't ever know expressing their opinion. Mmkay? MMKAY.
mangareadr Wrote:Yay, my hometown got on the news.
NOT.
THIS is why you don't do mind bending drugs.
THIS is why tripping out on hallucinogens is a bad idea.
The sad thing is, the first I heard about it was in Biology class,
During a lecture on why we SHOULDN'T SMOKE POT. Not why we shouldn't do PCP or LSD or METH, but pot.
Teachers win the award for how to turn a horrific incident into a bullshit scaring technique to use on teens.
Goddamnit, I'm sick of hearing how teens shouldn't do drugs, of being shown videos about guys who got cancer from marijuana, shit like that,
Because adults like this sick fuck who ate his own kid's eye are the ones who need to watch the video, take the classes, be monitored. I'm in high school and I've NEVER met someone who smokes marijuana.
So stop sayin it's the kids fault and take care of the psychopaths like this who are killing themselves and the people around them.
This. No... This x 10
“The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it.”
― Neil deGrasse Tyson
Gaiyara-chan Wrote:Um, how the hell do you bite someone's eye out? The thing rests in a socket.
lol wut
You can bite the front off.
Hidden stuff:
"A 'no' uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a 'yes' merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble." - Mahatma Gandhi
"The irrationality of a thing is no argument against its existence, rather a condition of it."
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
-Ben Franklin
"when I was a kid I used to pray for a bicycle. then I realized that god doesn't work that way. so I stole one and prayed for forgiveness."
"I would rather die for something I believe in than live for anything else."
"What is the task of higher education? To make a man into a machine. What are the means employed? He is taught how to suffer being bored." – F W Nietzsche
What, you think I have to endorse LSD because I like John Lennon's music and find him an inspirational person?
O.o
I like Nirvana, and I think that Kurt Cobain was a great singer and songwriter. Does that mean I think suicide is a valid route for someone with depression? NO. I'd much rather them get some help.
John Lennon was an amazing man who made mistakes like we all do. Just because I find the GOOD things he did inspirational doesn't mean I endorse EVERYTHING he did.
In other words, I'm not an idiot.
An it Harm None, Do What Ye Will
An it Harm, Do Only What Ye Must
Lighten up! This life was made for experimenting, making mistakes, falling on our faces, and standing up to do it all over again.
Live for Learning.
Carla Franklin may be a whore. She may be a wonderful, kind, moral woman. Seeing as I don't know her personally, I cannot know for sure. However, I find her actions (suing Google, requesting the personal info of her critics, getting angry over random internet idiocy that she should ignore and be bigger than, trying to get this site in trouble because of a few users' commentary on the situation, etc.) pretty ridiculous and unwarranted. If she didn't want people to to be talking about/judging her, well 1. that's impossible, she's a human, and 2. she shouldn't have been a model or agreed to be on film. AND 3. she DEFINITELY shouldn't have sued Google and made all this fuss over a few random idiots whom she probably won't ever know expressing their opinion. Mmkay? MMKAY.
mangareadr Wrote:Yay, my hometown got on the news.
NOT.
THIS is why you don't do mind bending drugs.
THIS is why tripping out on hallucinogens is a bad idea.
The sad thing is, the first I heard about it was in Biology class,
During a lecture on why we SHOULDN'T SMOKE POT. Not why we shouldn't do PCP or LSD or METH, but pot.
Teachers win the award for how to turn a horrific incident into a bullshit scaring technique to use on teens.
Goddamnit, I'm sick of hearing how teens shouldn't do drugs, of being shown videos about guys who got cancer from marijuana, shit like that,
Because adults like this sick fuck who ate his own kid's eye are the ones who need to watch the video, take the classes, be monitored. I'm in high school and I've NEVER met someone who smokes marijuana.
So stop sayin it's the kids fault and take care of the psychopaths like this who are killing themselves and the people around them.
Drugs don't make u do bad things, being agrivated while under a drug's influence can cause anger and actions based on that emotion, but not attacking or resort to animalistic behaviour
Hidden stuff:
TRIGGER WARNING: THIS TRIGGER WARNING CONTAINS TRIGGER WARNINGS!
Dear Tumblrites:Despite your wrongly self-diagnosedPTSD, no line ofscientific evidencesuggests people can be triggered over theinternet. Triggering works through thesenses(i.e. smell, taste, touch, vision, hearing.) but it goes throughreal time; if you're not experiencing it in real life as it'sACTUALLY HAPPENINGin yourACTUALlife, youCANNOTbe triggered. The only exception to this is if you have aseizure, but then again, that's triggered byepilepsy(i.e. rapidly-changing flashing lights)NOT PTSD. Remembering a bad incident is NOT the same thing as having aflashback. When you remember, youthink; when youflashback,youfeel.
#HashTagsAreForIdiots
Max Stirnir Wrote:"In the time of spirits thoughts grew till they overtopped my head, whose offspring they yet were; they hovered about me and convulsed me like fever-phantasies -- an awful power. The thoughts had become corporeal on their own account, were ghosts, e. g. God, Emperor, Pope, Fatherland, etc. If I destroy their corporeity, then I take them back into mine, and say: "I alone am corporeal." And now I take the world as what it is to me, as mine, as my property; I refer all to myself."The Ego and Its Own, pg. 15
Charles Manson Wrote:“Look down at me and you see a fool;
look up at me and you see a god;
look straight at me and you see yourself”
HeartofShadows Wrote:"Life is nothing more than a druggie trying to get their quick fix of happiness while dealing with the harsh withdrawal of reality"
Osip Mandelstam Wrote:"I divide all of world literature into authorized and unauthorized works. The former are all trash; the latter--stolen air. I want to spit in the face of every writer who first obtains permission and then writes."The Fourth Prose, 1930.
Lukas Foss Wrote:That is why the analogy of stealing does not work. With a thief, we want to know how much money he stole, and from whom. With the artist it is not how much he took and from whom, but what he did with it.
Well, yeah, I see that side of it too.
The thing is that drugs used by people who were aggressive or addictive from the start are what cause the serious problems...
I just don't want to take that risk with me, because I know I could get addicted really easy. It's in my genes and my personality...
An it Harm None, Do What Ye Will
An it Harm, Do Only What Ye Must
Lighten up! This life was made for experimenting, making mistakes, falling on our faces, and standing up to do it all over again.
Live for Learning.
Carla Franklin may be a whore. She may be a wonderful, kind, moral woman. Seeing as I don't know her personally, I cannot know for sure. However, I find her actions (suing Google, requesting the personal info of her critics, getting angry over random internet idiocy that she should ignore and be bigger than, trying to get this site in trouble because of a few users' commentary on the situation, etc.) pretty ridiculous and unwarranted. If she didn't want people to to be talking about/judging her, well 1. that's impossible, she's a human, and 2. she shouldn't have been a model or agreed to be on film. AND 3. she DEFINITELY shouldn't have sued Google and made all this fuss over a few random idiots whom she probably won't ever know expressing their opinion. Mmkay? MMKAY.
PCP is known to cause extreme rage and aggression in the person that is taking it. I don't know much about drugs but I think the most popular hallucinogens are safe as long as you have a sitter so you don't walk outside in the middle of traffic or jump off a building... you can't talk about PCP and LSD and marijuana in the same sentence. You have to consider the particular drug rather than lumping all drugs together and calling it evil.
LSD isn't a party drug, you must only use it while Isolated in order to have a good trip
Hidden stuff:
TRIGGER WARNING: THIS TRIGGER WARNING CONTAINS TRIGGER WARNINGS!
Dear Tumblrites:Despite your wrongly self-diagnosedPTSD, no line ofscientific evidencesuggests people can be triggered over theinternet. Triggering works through thesenses(i.e. smell, taste, touch, vision, hearing.) but it goes throughreal time; if you're not experiencing it in real life as it'sACTUALLY HAPPENINGin yourACTUALlife, youCANNOTbe triggered. The only exception to this is if you have aseizure, but then again, that's triggered byepilepsy(i.e. rapidly-changing flashing lights)NOT PTSD. Remembering a bad incident is NOT the same thing as having aflashback. When you remember, youthink; when youflashback,youfeel.
#HashTagsAreForIdiots
Max Stirnir Wrote:"In the time of spirits thoughts grew till they overtopped my head, whose offspring they yet were; they hovered about me and convulsed me like fever-phantasies -- an awful power. The thoughts had become corporeal on their own account, were ghosts, e. g. God, Emperor, Pope, Fatherland, etc. If I destroy their corporeity, then I take them back into mine, and say: "I alone am corporeal." And now I take the world as what it is to me, as mine, as my property; I refer all to myself."The Ego and Its Own, pg. 15
Charles Manson Wrote:“Look down at me and you see a fool;
look up at me and you see a god;
look straight at me and you see yourself”
HeartofShadows Wrote:"Life is nothing more than a druggie trying to get their quick fix of happiness while dealing with the harsh withdrawal of reality"
Osip Mandelstam Wrote:"I divide all of world literature into authorized and unauthorized works. The former are all trash; the latter--stolen air. I want to spit in the face of every writer who first obtains permission and then writes."The Fourth Prose, 1930.
Lukas Foss Wrote:That is why the analogy of stealing does not work. With a thief, we want to know how much money he stole, and from whom. With the artist it is not how much he took and from whom, but what he did with it.
It's still a good idea to have a sitter, you never know when you'll have a bad trip, and even if you don't hurt yourself you might break stuff which would suck when you come back to Earth.
mangareadr Wrote:What, you think I have to endorse LSD because I like John Lennon's music and find him an inspirational person?
O.o
No.
I was just baffled at how you could have such an opinion when you were an obvious fan of John Lennon. It would lead me to believe that you researched his life somewhat, and the events that shaped him into who he is. From there, I would think that you would question the stigma attached to the things Lennon was doing because logic would tell me if Lennon was doing things that were supposed to corrupt you, turn you into a maniac, and result in the downfall of a moral society, and then turned into what he was. Then maybe the stigma attached to the things he was doing wasn't necessarily true.
Maybe, just maybe, the same thing you said about pot can be applied to other drugs.
And I think John Lennon is a PERFECT example of how wrong society can be on something, so it surprised me that you were perpetuating the same thing society has been saying while promoting someone who proved them completely wrong.
mangareadr Wrote:In other words, I'm not an idiot.
I wasn't implying that you were an idiot. I just thought in being a fan of someone who belonged to a counter-culture, you yourself would question the morals and values of the culture Lennon rebelled against. Which would especially include the negative feelings attached to drug use, since drug use was a really huge thing happening at that time.
I personally think it's foolish not to question the values of any culture (or counter-culture). And that goes twice as much for the values that you agree with.
Very very true.
I have questioned them, but I've never had to make a choice considering drugs, or met anyone who could use them wisely, so it's just easy for me to say I agree with/don't agree with drugs of certain kinds.
Mind bending drugs used by stupid people for no other purpose than to be stupid and 'rebellious' are dangerous.
But used by someone who understands the risks and chemicals involved is most likely safer.
And about Lennon, yeah, researching him and his life pretty much blew all my conventional beliefs out the water, or at least questioned them.
Anyway.
I just think that whatever anyone decides, be careful while/if taking drugs. Nobody can control what people do, so we just have to say be careful and be aware of any consequences that might result.
(Which I think are way overblown by the media, but are there nonetheless...)
Sorry if I got defensive, I didn't mean to put words in your mouth.
An it Harm None, Do What Ye Will
An it Harm, Do Only What Ye Must
Lighten up! This life was made for experimenting, making mistakes, falling on our faces, and standing up to do it all over again.
Live for Learning.
Carla Franklin may be a whore. She may be a wonderful, kind, moral woman. Seeing as I don't know her personally, I cannot know for sure. However, I find her actions (suing Google, requesting the personal info of her critics, getting angry over random internet idiocy that she should ignore and be bigger than, trying to get this site in trouble because of a few users' commentary on the situation, etc.) pretty ridiculous and unwarranted. If she didn't want people to to be talking about/judging her, well 1. that's impossible, she's a human, and 2. she shouldn't have been a model or agreed to be on film. AND 3. she DEFINITELY shouldn't have sued Google and made all this fuss over a few random idiots whom she probably won't ever know expressing their opinion. Mmkay? MMKAY.
Yeah I totally get what you're saying.
I just think that I can think up alternate perspectives pretty well without drugs.
I mean, music is basically a mind altering drug for me, I can listen to a beatles song or even something not stereotypically trippy and find some sort of truth or something creative or meaningful in it.
I don't know, I can induce myself into a natural high with no drugs or chemicals so...I don't think I'll need to do any, seriously.
But I mean, if you had to, there are certainly smarter ways to do it than smoking your brains out or tripping out at a party to look 'cool'.
Everything in that article about Albert Hoffman that talked about how it was hijacked by the hippie movement and condemned was right on the mark.
I love hippies, but they shoulda kept the LSD on the down low.... :/
An it Harm None, Do What Ye Will
An it Harm, Do Only What Ye Must
Lighten up! This life was made for experimenting, making mistakes, falling on our faces, and standing up to do it all over again.
Live for Learning.
Carla Franklin may be a whore. She may be a wonderful, kind, moral woman. Seeing as I don't know her personally, I cannot know for sure. However, I find her actions (suing Google, requesting the personal info of her critics, getting angry over random internet idiocy that she should ignore and be bigger than, trying to get this site in trouble because of a few users' commentary on the situation, etc.) pretty ridiculous and unwarranted. If she didn't want people to to be talking about/judging her, well 1. that's impossible, she's a human, and 2. she shouldn't have been a model or agreed to be on film. AND 3. she DEFINITELY shouldn't have sued Google and made all this fuss over a few random idiots whom she probably won't ever know expressing their opinion. Mmkay? MMKAY.
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