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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

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I gave up misanthropy
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Miller0700 Offline
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Post: #1
I gave up misanthropy

A few years ago, the bullying I went through, morbid reports from around the world, and the bleak living conditions I lived around made me a misanthrope.

But now I realized it was pointless. I wasn't making my life any better nor did I feel better being one. I simply realized that it was arrogant of me to hate everyone when I harshly and quickly judged others without understanding them first .

To be a misanthrope is to be ignorant of others and to further ruin the world.

Previously known as Derchin.
05-28-2011 01:52 PM
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UnschoolShqiponjë Offline
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Post: #2
Re: I gave up misanthropy

That's great... I am telling you your life will probably be brighter... just better in general. I used to hold misanthropy based feelings and it brought me nothing but suffering to be quite honest...

People can be awesome and they can be dicks... understanding them is important before judging them. Stick with those that bring you happiness and joy... leave or minimally interact with the ones that don't... school fucks it up and sometimes even societal standards... but we must do what is good for us.

Live until you die
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05-28-2011 03:13 PM
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SH☮TGUNHEⒶRT Offline
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Post: #3
Re: I gave up misanthropy

Yeah, I try not to be misanthrope. Like, but people always seem to judge me quickly, and everyone I try to get to know, lets me down, or makes me hate them so.
I guess, i really feel no attachment, or love for anyone I know. So what does that mean, I hate?
Yes, I'm becoming a misanthrope.

To be an anarchist, is to suffer greatly. To be a black woman is to suffer secretly. To be the earth, is to suffer silently.

I wish no harm on anyone, but those whose harmful ways will not stop without the same harm.

It's time we kill this cancerous system, before it kills us and everything left of gaia. Rise from our immaturity and take back our autonomy!

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05-29-2011 04:44 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #4
Re: I gave up misanthropy

I tend to categorize people quickly, and sometimes I'm wrong... most of the time I never see the person again, so I never find out if I was right or wrong.

'Judging' is a built in mechanism that people do, it can be a useful thing... as in "That guy looks mean, I think I'll steer clear of him"... but even useful things can become burdens when overdone.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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05-29-2011 07:25 AM
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UnschoolShqiponjë Offline
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Post: #5
Re: I gave up misanthropy

BaronVonStrangle Wrote:
The Desert Fox Wrote:Another quality post by Baron.
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Let's see how long your positive attitude lasts you buddy
Been lasting me years and is fucking awesome... :troll:

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05-29-2011 01:56 PM
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aaaaaaasd Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy (split)

Let me tell you a fun story my dear.

At the start of Year Eleven, I PROMISED myself that I would try to be optimistic. I PROMISED myself that if I kept a positive attitude this year would turn out to be decent I could leave with SOME happy memories. Well, fuck that shit. This year everyone in my fucking school was determined to make me miserable as possible, to hate life, myself and humanity, and by the end of it I was thanking an invisible sky wizard that I was out of there.

Fuck positivity. At least with negativity, you can be positively suprised when a few rare good things happen. Try to be positive and BAM life kicks you in the balls OVER and OVER and OVER AGAIN. Cynicism and making snide comments about how shit life is for the fucking win.
05-29-2011 07:51 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #7
Re: I gave up misanthropy (split)

Or better yet, stop being so obsessed with what other people do. They're beyond your control. You can only control what you do... there's no need to think about what good or bad thing X person is going to do, because you can't possibly know. Give 'em a chance but don't trust them unless they prove they're trustworthy. Basing your outlook of life on external circumstances beyond your control is bound to result in misery.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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05-29-2011 08:38 PM
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Faby Offline
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Post: #8
Re: I gave up misanthropy

Quote:Basing your outlook of life on external circumstances beyond your control is bound to result in misery.

B-but what else could you base your outlook on? You have to be rooted in reality. In fact, outlooks should be abolished, or at least, the only outlook should be, "bad shit happens; good shit might happen, too, but rarer."

Let go of all desire for the common good, and the good becomes common as grass.

~~

Good fortune follows upon disaster;
Disaster lurks within good fortune;
Who can say how things will end?
Perhaps there is no end.
05-29-2011 09:03 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #9
Re: I gave up misanthropy

How 'bout plain old... "shit happens"? Razz

I reject your reality and substitute my own. - I actually did that. When my life sucked ass and everyone was picking on me every day, I just went into my own little imaginary world and ignored "reality" as much as possible. Then when I got away from those idiots finally, I decided to check reality out, and it turned out to be pretty cool for the most part.

So in a way, reality is totally debateable. What you call reality could be something different to someone else. Your imagination could be reality for you, if you want. It is actually possible to ignore all the bad stuff that happens, and only focus on the good stuff. Then that becomes your "reality". So what if you end up ignoring 90% of the stuff that happens as a result? You'll be happier. And you'll probably eventually figure out how to make more good stuff happen instead of bad stuff. Shrug

What's the point of focusing on the bad stuff that happens? Does it do anyone any good? I've never understood this idea. Sure, it'll make you angry so you'll be "motivated" to do something about it... but you can do something about it without being angry... so what's the point?

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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05-29-2011 10:37 PM
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UnschoolShqiponjë Offline
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Post: #10
Re: I gave up misanthropy

Quote:At the start of Year Eleven, I PROMISED myself that I would try to be optimistic. I PROMISED myself that if I kept a positive attitude this year would turn out to be decent I could leave with SOME happy memories. Well, fuck that shit. This year everyone in my fucking school was determined to make me miserable as possible, to hate life, myself and humanity, and by the end of it I was thanking an invisible sky wizard that I was out of there.

You are in fucking high school... one of the most anti-life institutions there is. Unless you were somehow gifted with awesome memory, athleticism, and you were very charismatic... it'll suck. During high school I was bigoted, stupid, angry, upset, not too popular, and generally life did suck... I did what Soul Riser mentioned... just left into an imaginary world constantly wishing to be somewhere else. I'd play Ultima Online all the fucking time. Once high school ended life got so much better. I am also not always positive. I know that soon many people in my family are going to start dying... and it already started. People are getting old. I am a realist and when bad happens I embrace it and change it if I can but I don't think about bad shit I can't change or couldn't. I let myself cry, let myself get upset because those are normal feelings. I don't sit there thinking "Oh GOLLY HO Life is going to be so great and the sun will shine everyday!" I just love life regardless of what happens... just ask my friends how I laughed when we almost got T-Boned by an 18 Wheeler... oh the irony that I, a careful driver that my friends make fun of for it, almost got smashed like that... it wasn't a good thing but whatever lol.

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05-29-2011 11:59 PM
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aaaaaaasd Offline
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Post: #11
Re: I gave up misanthropy

Yes, because prentending that you live in a fantasy world full of unicorns and faeries and Magical Staff +10 will solve ALL your problems.
05-30-2011 05:36 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

Yes, because ignore it and it will go away.

Well, not entirely, but time will pass and eventually you'll be able to leave the bastards. Might as well entertain yourself and make life as pleasant as possible while you wait.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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05-30-2011 06:57 AM
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HeartofShadows Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

Gave up misanthropy sometime ago myself as hating did nothing but make me tired(although it did keep me warm) but I'm not gonna shit rainbows either.
I tend to like indifference as I can still be surprised but most times not giving a damn about the bad things is the best. Also difference I'm 23 and out of school.

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05-31-2011 12:49 AM
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UnschoolShqiponjë Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

BaronVonStrangle Wrote:Yes, because prentending that you live in a fantasy world full of unicorns and faeries and Magical Staff +10 will solve ALL your problems.

Who do you think is/was happier? Me or you? Fu

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05-31-2011 01:59 AM
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HeartofShadows Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

UnschoolShqiponjë Wrote:
BaronVonStrangle Wrote:Yes, because prentending that you live in a fantasy world full of unicorns and faeries and Magical Staff +10 will solve ALL your problems.

Who do you think is/was happier? Me or you? Fu

U mad?

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05-31-2011 02:42 AM
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UnschoolShqiponjë Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

HeartofShadows Wrote:
UnschoolShqiponjë Wrote:
BaronVonStrangle Wrote:Yes, because prentending that you live in a fantasy world full of unicorns and faeries and Magical Staff +10 will solve ALL your problems.

Who do you think is/was happier? Me or you? Fu

U mad?

That's a happy smiley giving the finger... I am happy! ;D

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05-31-2011 02:45 AM
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HeartofShadows Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

UnschoolShqiponjë Wrote:That's a happy smiley giving the finger... I am happy! ;D

Sorry I thought I saw a bit of lingering bitterness beneath the smile. Laugh


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05-31-2011 02:48 AM
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batboy138 Offline
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Post: #18
Re: I gave up misanthropy (split)

BaronVonStrangle Wrote:Let me tell you a fun story my dear.

Fuck positivity. At least with negativity, you can be positively suprised when a few rare good things happen. Try to be positive and BAM life kicks you in the balls OVER and OVER and OVER AGAIN. Cynicism and making snide comments about how shit life is for the fucking win.
Nothing wrong with a little bit of bad every once in a while. I'm a pessimist with a nasty sense of humor!

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06-01-2011 09:51 AM
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aaaaaaasd Offline
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Post: #19
Re: I gave up misanthropy

UnschoolShqiponjë Wrote:
BaronVonStrangle Wrote:Yes, because prentending that you live in a fantasy world full of unicorns and faeries and Magical Staff +10 will solve ALL your problems.

Who do you think is/was happier? Me or you? Fu
Pretending that you are happy and actually being happy are two very different things.
06-02-2011 12:25 AM
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UnschoolShqiponjë Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

BaronVonStrangle Wrote:
UnschoolShqiponjë Wrote:
BaronVonStrangle Wrote:Yes, because prentending that you live in a fantasy world full of unicorns and faeries and Magical Staff +10 will solve ALL your problems.

Who do you think is/was happier? Me or you? Fu
Pretending that you are happy and actually being happy are two very different things.

Well... obviously.

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06-02-2011 08:10 AM
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aaaaaaasd Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

Stop dodging my point. Were you really happy playing Ultima all night when your school life sucked because that was what you wanted to do or was it because that was the only thing you could do?
06-02-2011 08:15 AM
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

BaronVonStrangle Wrote:Stop dodging my point. Were you really happy playing Ultima all night when your school life sucked because that was what you wanted to do or was it because that was the only thing you could do?

No I wasn't happy in high school because of compulsory education... not being given real choices... disrespect... etc... I am happy now though. I did used to pretend I was happy in high school though I wasn't... I always knew I wasn't happy though... I just pretended.

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06-02-2011 08:18 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

I don't get it. If it's a choice between using your imagination to ignore the sucky reality you're in, and living in the sucky reality while being miserable... what's wrong with the first choice? Yeah sure, it won't make reality entirely go away, but if you really don't see any decent way out, where's the harm in it? It won't make you "happy" but it will help you keep your sanity for longer so you can be happier when you get away from the suckiness.

Unless of course you want to be miserable...

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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06-02-2011 08:56 AM
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Miller0700 Offline
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Post: #24
Re: I gave up misanthropy

SoulRiser Wrote:I don't get it. If it's a choice between using your imagination to ignore the sucky reality you're in, and living in the sucky reality while being miserable... what's wrong with the first choice? Yeah sure, it won't make reality entirely go away, but if you really don't see any decent way out, where's the harm in it? It won't make you "happy" but it will help you keep your sanity for longer so you can be happier when you get away from the suckiness.

Unless of course you want to be miserable...

Yeah, people get away from reality nearly everyday. Its called music.

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06-02-2011 10:11 AM
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

Derchin Wrote:
SoulRiser Wrote:I don't get it. If it's a choice between using your imagination to ignore the sucky reality you're in, and living in the sucky reality while being miserable... what's wrong with the first choice? Yeah sure, it won't make reality entirely go away, but if you really don't see any decent way out, where's the harm in it? It won't make you "happy" but it will help you keep your sanity for longer so you can be happier when you get away from the suckiness.

Unless of course you want to be miserable...

Yeah, people get away from reality nearly everyday. Its called music, tv, gaming, internet. computer, sex, drugs, etc

Fixed that for ya derchin.

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06-02-2011 10:16 AM
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Miller0700 Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

HeartofShadows Wrote:Yeah, people get away from reality nearly everyday. Its called music, tv, gaming, internet. computer, sex, drugs, etc

Fixed that for ya derchin.[/quote]
Biggrin

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06-02-2011 10:22 AM
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

Derchin Wrote:
SoulRiser Wrote:I don't get it. If it's a choice between using your imagination to ignore the sucky reality you're in, and living in the sucky reality while being miserable... what's wrong with the first choice? Yeah sure, it won't make reality entirely go away, but if you really don't see any decent way out, where's the harm in it? It won't make you "happy" but it will help you keep your sanity for longer so you can be happier when you get away from the suckiness.

Unless of course you want to be miserable...

Yeah, people get away from reality nearly everyday. Its called music.

Agreed to both and HoS' edit lol

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Re: I gave up misanthropy

SoulRiser Wrote:I don't get it. If it's a choice between using your imagination to ignore the sucky reality you're in, and living in the sucky reality while being miserable... what's wrong with the first choice? Yeah sure, it won't make reality entirely go away, but if you really don't see any decent way out, where's the harm in it? It won't make you "happy" but it will help you keep your sanity for longer so you can be happier when you get away from the suckiness.

Unless of course you want to be miserable...
Ignoring reality is immature and stupid. And if you can't handle the real world, without partial sedation, then you don't belong there.

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06-03-2011 07:22 AM
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Miller0700 Offline
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Re: I gave up misanthropy

batboy138 Wrote:
SoulRiser Wrote:I don't get it. If it's a choice between using your imagination to ignore the sucky reality you're in, and living in the sucky reality while being miserable... what's wrong with the first choice? Yeah sure, it won't make reality entirely go away, but if you really don't see any decent way out, where's the harm in it? It won't make you "happy" but it will help you keep your sanity for longer so you can be happier when you get away from the suckiness.

Unless of course you want to be miserable...
Ignoring reality is immature and stupid. And if you can't handle the real world, without partial sedation, then you don't belong there.

So we just lay around feeling sorry for ourselves without trying to do anything to lessen it?

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06-03-2011 07:49 AM
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Post: #30
Re: I gave up misanthropy

batboy138 Wrote:Ignoring reality is immature and stupid. And if you can't handle the real world, without partial sedation, then you don't belong there.
I guess I should have taken the blue pill.

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