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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.
I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.
I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.
I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.
I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.
Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.
Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.
-SoulRiser
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Good lord.
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ElPuanchy
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Good lord.
Do you know how hard it is to navigate in this damn forum? Seriously, for high school dropouts, you could of made it a little more "Retard Friendly" I say that in quotes so I won't get in trouble for it.
BUT YES;
Hai, my name is El, El Puanchy. and I'm basically a high school drop out, Like, just didn't actually drop out. I was a smart ass to my teachers, only the dick ones, which was like... 1, the rest of my teachers were pro. I got low scores on my tests, and bad reports. So my hopes of getting a job is slim to none.
So yeah, I basically fucked up my life not going to school. Try and convince me otherwise. and I might tell you a bit more about myself and what I might do.
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 09:06 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
You're the only one who has problems navigating here.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 09:08 AM |
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Raikuron
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Re: Good lord.
This guy is not Duelix. I am sure of it, I know him on another site.
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05-27-2010 09:09 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
Hmm, okay. Still, it won't be easy to get around being a dick.
And you fucked up your life not by dropping out, but by not moving a finger yourself to learn something useful.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 09:14 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
Ceiling Cat Wrote:Hmm, okay. Still, it won't be easy to get around being a dick.
And you fucked up your life not by dropping out, but by not moving a finger yourself to learn something useful.
I didn't drop out; and I have learned useful stuff. I wanted to drop out, but my parents didn't let me. so, to spite them, I did shit all in school.
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 09:17 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
That's just as I do, except that I already work.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 09:23 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
So, basically. This site is full of people that got bullied as a kid?
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 09:25 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
Umm, some?
Originality is an easy target.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 09:27 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
What about you? what's your story?
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 09:29 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
Well, I never gave a damn. Worked towards game development for past few years, now I'm a level designer. That's it.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 09:32 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
What language?
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 09:49 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
*headsplode*
I just said, level designer. Not much to do with coding if you ask.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 09:51 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
Oh, so you just draw the level? you don't need to code variables and shit? I thought that's the level designers job aswell. Man, being a level designer seems easy now.
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 09:56 AM |
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MorikoMisa
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Re: Good lord.
Hello Elpuanchy, I'm Moriko.
And I wasn't bullied as a kid, I was homeschooled. Then I went to school because I wanted to feel normal, I may only be fourteen, but I practically TASTE the difference between learning on my own.with my mom and learning with a teacher. You can still get a job, you just have to work harder to prove yourself.
*SPARKLING* *DOUCHEBUCKETS.*
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05-27-2010 10:00 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
You're still a kid; you've got another 4 years to get bullied.
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 10:07 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
ElPuanchy Wrote:Oh, so you just draw the level? you don't need to code variables and shit? I thought that's the level designers job aswell. Man, being a level designer seems easy now.
The scripting is usually done by linking events in a graphical interface such as Unreal Kismet. It also includes less modelling than before, now a lot is done on reusable static meshes (with the exception of Source Engine which still runs on good ol' BSP)
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 10:10 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
See, so you do use code;
When I payed attention to my Software Design class, I learned Pascal and C++. But yeah; that shit's easy.
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 10:13 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
See, so you do use code;
When I payed attention to my Software Design class, I learned Pascal and C++. But yeah; that shit's easy.
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 10:14 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
It's not much of a code, it's drawing lines between created nodes.
In ID Tech and Source these nodes are directly in the level so it's even more graphic.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 10:18 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
*nods* Understandable. How many levels have you designed?
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 10:24 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
Why do you assume I count...?
But I can show what I'm doing.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 10:27 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
Looks a bit like the jungle bit in farcry 2 demo that I saw in E3
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 10:29 AM |
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MorikoMisa
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Re: Good lord.
ElPuanchy Wrote:You're still a kid; you've got another 4 years to get bullied.
I'm not a kid, meh biologically yes, mentally...not really... And why would i get bullied? I'm scary enough that anyone who tried would be too scared of getting groped and sexually harassed to continue.
These people know that about me. *Winks and grins* Also women tend to back away from me.
*SPARKLING* *DOUCHEBUCKETS.*
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05-27-2010 10:37 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
So how old would you say you are mentally, Moriko?
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 10:42 AM |
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MorikoMisa
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Re: Good lord.
I don't have an exact age. Older than 16, younger than 80. Minus the drugs, sex, drinking, sluttish-ness, makeup and such. Then again I can act like I'm 12 if I want to...
*SPARKLING* *DOUCHEBUCKETS.*
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05-27-2010 10:59 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
Aww; but the sex and drinking is the best bit about being old.
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 11:15 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
ElPuanchy Wrote:Aww; but the sex and drinking is the best bit about being old.
No, just no. It's immature as fuck to claim so, there are much better things to waste time on.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 11:17 AM |
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ElPuanchy
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Re: Good lord.
Lemme guess, you're a sXe?
o/~ Under the sea, Under the sea~ Darling it's better down where it's wetter, take it from me. o/~
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05-27-2010 11:22 AM |
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Ceiling Cat
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Re: Good lord.
Sort of.
Problem, officer?
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05-27-2010 11:27 AM |
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MorikoMisa
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Re: Good lord.
I would TRY drugs, I like a drink at celebrations and I like some pretty strange sexual things. But yeah, agreed with the CCat.
*SPARKLING* *DOUCHEBUCKETS.*
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05-27-2010 11:28 AM |
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