Yeah... it's really sad. Especially because most of the parents who are like that were abused in the past, and now they're abusing their own kids, but they're so deep in denial about it. They've been so desensitized that they actually think emotional abuse is a fake thing.
Quote:The members of estranged parents' forums agree that abuse is an acceptable reason to estrange your parents. They also have high standards for what counts as abuse.
What situation from a childhood would explain estrangement from your parents?
This is my list:
1) Leaving them alone for days on end with no food.
2) Letting men have sex with them or selling their bodies for sex or porno.
3) Beating the hell out of them.
4) Burning them with cigarettes.
5) Exposing them to and giving them street drugs.
They're very, very clear that abuse has to be severe to justify estrangement. Mild physical abuse isn't enough; you have to beat the hell out of your kids or burn them with cigarettes. Abuse of legal drugs like alcohol doesn't count. Moderate neglect doesn't count, just neglect so severe that the kids would be lucky to survive it.
Emotional abuse isn't a legitimate excuse—too easy to claim, too hard to prove, too likely an accusation to have been leveled at the member in question. Many members of estranged parents' forums have divorced abusive spouses and freely describe their exes as emotionally abusive, but they find estranged children's s claims of emotional abuse highly suspect.
It's like... describing colours to a person who has never been able to see... you just can't. They just won't understand... wow.
And it sucks, because they are clearly hurting too... and it's basically impossible to help them.