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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

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My parents are stopping me
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MadPanda Offline
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Post: #1
My parents are stopping me

I just feel like I need to let this out.

I'm a really big supporter of unschooling, I've read so many articles and stories of people having better experiences and going on to live a more fulfilling life than if they were in school. Just now I asked my parents if I could also try it out. I gave them a list of what I hated about school (basically everything) and how unschooling could benefit me. Guess what? They shouted and screamed at me for being unreasonable and said that I 'have to' go to school and started mentioning starving children in Africa and how they don't even have the chance to have an education. First of all, I'm sorry for the starving children but school should be a choice we can all make. If they want to go to school, fine, but I don't. And it's not like I won't be getting an education, I'll just be getting it in a different way. But they don't understand me at all.

There. I'm done.
01-04-2016 07:24 AM
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Dead Offline
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Post: #2
RE: My parents are stopping me

(01-04-2016 07:24 AM)MadPanda Wrote:  They shouted and screamed at me for being unreasonable and said that I 'have to' go to school and started mentioning starving children in Africa and how they don't even have the chance to have an education. First of all, I'm sorry for the starving children but school should be a choice we can all make.

Your parents sound selfish for continuing to live when there are starving children in Africa that could eat them.
01-04-2016 09:37 AM
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GamerGurl Away
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Post: #3
My parents are stopping me

Wow. That's almost the same experience I had when I began to try and convince my parents to let me be homeschooled. However, they mentioned that I had to go to school "just like everybody else" and that "it was for my own benefit" more than the starving children in Africa. That typical pro-school apologist deflection maneuver was unusually rare for them to say.

I don't know how constructively presenting them a list of how school is a complete and utter detriment to your life and requesting you be homeschooled is selfish in any way. I'm with Dead here—they are the selfish ones.

Seven crappy hours of our lives.
01-04-2016 12:09 PM
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eric hirsch Offline
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Post: #4
My parents are stopping me

My parents are the same way I try to help them see that unschooling makes way more sense than normal school but they just think its stupid
01-04-2016 03:01 PM
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brainiac3397 Offline
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Post: #5
RE: My parents are stopping me

Screw the damn starving children of Africa. We aint even in Africa.

EDIT:btw that excuse is rascist as hell and totally ignorant because it dismisses africa like some sort of tribal famine ridden backwater. The correct response to that sort of excuse is "bitch, nairobi has sky fucking scrapers".

(Ive been watching the boondocks and its making me feel ghetto black cultureish. Itll pass when I finish it or watch the new star wars...aight)

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(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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(This post was last modified: 01-04-2016 04:22 PM by brainiac3397.)
01-04-2016 04:09 PM
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Cianna200 Offline
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Post: #6
RE: My parents are stopping me

The main problem I see is that parents want us to learn and succeed in life but are anti anything not school, if they really want us to learn, be educated and become successful later on in life, why should it matter on how we do it, not to mention we should feel happy and well
Not feeling the love there
(This post was last modified: 01-04-2016 10:25 PM by Cianna200.)
01-04-2016 10:21 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #7
My parents are stopping me

Quote:They shouted and screamed at me for being unreasonable and said that I 'have to' go to school and started mentioning starving children in Africa and how they don't even have the chance to have an education.
Oh, you're being unreasonable? You weren't the one shouting and screaming and trying to use guilt to make people appreciate things they actually hate.

Quote:btw that excuse is rascist as hell and totally ignorant because it dismisses africa like some sort of tribal famine ridden backwater. The correct response to that sort of excuse is "bitch, nairobi has sky fucking scrapers".
Well... I live in South Africa... and some parts of it literally are a tribal famine-ridden backwater. Some parts of the cities aren't too far off from that either, but there they technically have schools... for whatever that's worth (not much). But definitely not all of it is like that, and we have cities and internet and all that fun stuff too, so it's not like all the kids in the entire Africa are starving and uneducated or something. And it doesn't take into account the other countries in the world (not in Africa) that have the same problems...

But really, the whole argument about the starving uneducated children in Africa is over-used. So people in America should appreciate schools they hate because many kids here don't have them? Yeah that doesn't make any damn sense. You could turn that around and tell them to eat all their food and don't ever throw any away because there are people starving here. But then everyone would get fat. Oh, wait...

Quote:Your parents sound selfish for continuing to live when there are starving children in Africa that could eat them.
I know this is horrible, but I found this hilarious.

MadPanda, did you draw the eye in your profile pic? 'Cause it's awesome.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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01-04-2016 11:09 PM
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Shanester97 Offline
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Post: #8
RE: My parents are stopping me

No offence, but your parents don't seem to be able to think critically and they are treating you like a little kid. My mum used the starving children Africa stuff on me when I was five years old and wouldn't finish my dinner.
It's one of those things intended to provoke empathy.
The reality is, yes there are starving children in Africa who would give amore arm for your education. The Education the op is better than the education system a lit of Africanso have access to. That's like comparing a shit with a bigger pile of shit.
Just because we have a better education system than Africa (sorru for generalisation) it doesn't mean our education system is good.
01-05-2016 10:40 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #9
My parents are stopping me

Quote:yes there are starving children in Africa who would give amore arm for your education
From what I've seen and heard, most of them don't give a crap about school anyway, because most of the typical "school stuff" isn't relevant to their lives. I mean... why would a starving kid in Africa care about math or the history of the country when they're still starving? Not that I know what they put in the middle of nowhere school curriculums or anything, but I assume it's the same stuff the rest of the country gets.

Someday when I'm rich, I'm gonna find a way to get computers and internet access all the way out there in the middle of nowhere places... that way they can see what the rest of the world looks like, and what's going on beyond their village. And well, obviously cute cat videos... but whatever. Razz

But back to the original point... I don't know how to reason with people who refuse reason. Maybe eventually if you talk about it enough, they'll soften up to the idea... or maybe not. Only you would know...

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
Help & Support - Get help with leaving school, unsupportive parents, and more.
Click here if school makes you depressed or suicidal

Support School Survival on Patreon or Donate Bitcoin Here: 1Q5WCcxWjayniaL92b8GfXBiGdfjmnUNa2
"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide
"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer
EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder

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01-05-2016 12:27 PM
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Azine Offline
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Post: #10
My parents are stopping me

I agree with Soulriser that the quote from Dead was quite funny given the context, it made me laugh too. I also think your profile pic is cool Madpanda.

Soulriser said: "But back to the original point... I don't know how to reason with people who refuse reason. Maybe eventually if you talk about it enough, they'll soften up to the idea... or maybe not. Only you would know...". That basically sums up my thoughts. It sucks to have parents that do not listen to what you say, especially since you didnt shout or try to guilt them back.

Do you have any idea why they think school is so important?
Is it because they want you to be like everyone else (why cant people appreciate eachother's uniqueness...Sigh)?
Do they care about college? Or only you getting a job?
Or are they so deeply entrenched in school that they think all people actually lèàrn stuff in school that is vital for life?

Except for school, what are they like as parents? I think it is pretty loveless, like Cianna200 said, to not care about your feelings and sending you off to a place you hate when there are better alternatives...
But maybe they do have some niceness in them? :/
Or some capacity for normal conversation without shouting...?

Sorry if these questions are repetitive or hurtful, I have not been on the forums much so I only know a handful of posters here.
01-05-2016 03:05 PM
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lisafromjackson Offline
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Post: #11
RE: My parents are stopping me

I don't know why I keep being surprised when parents respond this way.

My first reaction is: they think you are saying you don't want to become educated. You have to show them that that isn't true. There are many ways and I'll include a few links here.

Second: We've been "schooled" since birth to believe without school, all is lost. In a way it's true -- kids who drop out of school often find themselves in a downward spiral. But with support, resources and help, that simply does not happen.

83% of unschooled kids in a survey of about 250 kids went to college.

Colleges are starting to wake up to the reality of school, and are looking for kids who are "doing it" differently.

Here are some links to resources that might help you communicate these things to your parents.

Can Unschooled or Self-Directed Learners Go to College?

What is Self-Directed Learning?

You can also Unschool with support from a new organization called Catalyst Learning Network. (We're taking free members now!)

Thanks for reaching out! Let us here more from you!

Lisa

Dialogue On Education ... where students and adults meet to hash out issues related to school.
(This post was last modified: 01-05-2016 11:22 PM by lisafromjackson.)
01-05-2016 11:16 PM
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Lucas Gallindo Offline
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Post: #12
RE: My parents are stopping me

(01-05-2016 11:16 PM)lisafromjackson Wrote:  they think you are saying you don't want to become educated.
My mom thinks this way, too Always we start to talk about it, she threat home~, un~, self-educated poeple like dump, ignorant and uncivilized people.

GallindãoBiggergrin
Learn is cool, but not in a school!
08-29-2016 07:15 AM
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Lucas Gallindo Offline
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Post: #13
My parents are stopping me

My mother starved when she was a child. I live in Brazil and this is a reality here, too, but she had a school.

GallindãoBiggergrin
Learn is cool, but not in a school!
01-18-2017 10:36 AM
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