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August 2001 - June 2017

The School Survival Forums are permanently retired. If you need help with quitting school, unsupportive parents or anything else, there is a list of resources on the Help Page.

If you want to write about your experiences in school, you can write on our blog.

To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

The forums are mostly read-only and are in a maintenance/testing phase, before being permanently archived. Please use this time to get the contact details of people you'd like to keep in touch with. My contact details are here.

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The reason I'm here I guess
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sfslol Offline
Rebel

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Post: #1
The reason I'm here I guess

I have a grudge with school for some reason. I just hate it so fucking much I don't know how I can another day without fainting. I've been going to school for 1 and a half week now, and I already feel depressed.

I don't really have any trouble with subjects or anything, I manage in most subjects and I enjoy learning. Of course sometimes it's boring, but it's not horrible. The thing I hate though, is everything we get learned to think. The school is trying to give you knowledge of having intelligence and it makes me so fucking depressed. I feel like I can't socialize with people anymore because I can't stand talking to people who accepts it, and the fact that I'm feeling depressed doesn't make it better.

When I tell my psychologist this, she agrees naturally, not that she actually thinks it herself but it's her job to understand others problems. I don't even know why I bother seeing her, but according to "society" I'm sick because thinking differently is a disease. I've been recommended pills many times, but I've declined because I know for a fact that I'm not really sick, I just spend a lot of time with my thoughts and it stresses me out. Kind of weird that I go to a psychologist to clean up my thoughts and find my problem, when I already am aware of it.

I also hate the fact that school is so much about socializing. Of course an argument is that "You are learning to cooperate with others". Well, do you really expect teens to cooperate well with each others? Also what about the individuals who actually want to learn, that get placed in a group of friends that's fuck all about being serious. I at least find this hard, even harder when I have to cope with a fucking depression at the same time.

As you might see, I handle this shit badly. Or as it's called by "society", anxiety. School caused me anxiety, and that's probably going to affect me for the rest of my life. It's not that I'm unable or scared to communicate with people, but I just feel better in my own company. I honestly don't know what to do anymore, because at this rate I'll go depressed within a week. And still if I quit it'll hit me later in life, because school is one of only ways to reach success. And I do really believe that I have the capacity to reach far in life, but this shit's in my way.

And without this depression, I wouldn't have thought of this. I probably would never have found this site and I would go to school tomorrow. But it's 3 am and I'm still depressed. I can't remember being able to focus on school, because my mind's been clouded for as long as I can remember. It's also causing memory loss and I rarely smile or laugh anymore. And if I would've told anyone this they would probably have told me to "Man up and get through it.". But the last thing I'm going to do is to feel sorry for myself, because I have no reason. I also try to keep it hidden to protect my family.

I'm actually starting to think that my intelligence is in my way of school, and it just sounds so fucked up but it's true. Funny how school tried to teach me intelligence, and in the end it made me see how messed up school really is.

Sorry if I got too deep, but it's good to vent sometimes.
As always thanks for letting me share my thoughts, it's nice to get feedback for a change. Smile

  • "I know that I am intelligent, because I know that I know nothing." - Socrates
  • "My thoughts were so loud I couldn't hear my mouth." - Unknown
(This post was last modified: 10-21-2015 11:28 AM by sfslol.)
10-21-2015 11:15 AM
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schoolsux Offline
fuck this school bullshit

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Post: #2
The reason I'm here I guess

Thinking differently is NOT a disease. If we all thought the exact same way, would we have cellphones? Or televisions? Or the Internet? Or even the wheel? The answer to all of those questions is no. Thinking differently is a great thing, otherwise we would probably still be cavemen. It advances the world in many different ways. Some people just don't see that (such as many people at your school).

schoolsux's countdown until school ends:

177 days until i get out of freshman year (aka hell)
1280 days until I get out of prison (aka school)

(as of november 28, 2016)

also Fu school

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10-21-2015 12:59 PM
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TheCancer Offline
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Post: #3
RE: The reason I'm here I guess

Great post

If you're in America right now is a long hard stretch.

I don't know if you know but I'm a public school teacher. It gets exhausting for everybody.

I don't know why teachers insist on making people work in groups. When ever I assign group work I always tell my students that if they want to work alone they may.

And being especially bright is indeed often a hindrance. Once you can think critically the blaring shortcomings of our education system will start to override everything. Believe me, I feel the same way about teaching. I know I can't do it right with 20-30 teens crammed in a room together against their will but I have decided to accept certain unavoidable realities because even if the pay is miserable I still need this job. My advice to you is to try to enjoy the positives from the experience, learn everything you can, and try to enjoy the company of your peers the best you can. Learn and have a good time.

Good luck.

If you want to be a different fish, you've got to jump out of the school.


Captain Beefheart
10-21-2015 04:58 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
Site Founder

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Post: #4
The reason I'm here I guess

Being intelligent and surrounded by less intelligent people is a sure recipe for depression. I think some scientists even confirmed that at some point, though I don't remember where or how.

"Socializing" is the most bullshit pro-school argument ever. Having to mingle with idiots makes me want to stay the hell away from people as much as possible. Whereas being around smart people actually gives me faith in humanity.

School is full of mostly average people (just like the rest of life), so the odds of finding intelligent people to socialize with is slim. And it's even harder to avoid the idiots there than it is in the rest of reality, so... it's a terrible place to "socialize".

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide
"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer
EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder

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10-22-2015 12:55 AM
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brainiac3397 Offline
Machiavellian Amoeba

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Post: #5
The reason I'm here I guess

Cause some schools take education to the "liberal" extreme that if you refuse group work, you refuse to be a member of their equal society?

Personality DNA Report
(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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10-22-2015 12:57 AM
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Cianna200 Offline
Pariah

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Post: #6
RE: The reason I'm here I guess

The whole "but you can socialize at school" thing is just a poor defense of school apologists, considering that we hear "shut up!" "Stop talking!" Quite a lot in school.
10-22-2015 02:17 AM
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Sunbourn Offline
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Post: #7
RE: The reason I'm here I guess

Quote: I also hate the fact that school is so much about socializing. Of course an argument is that "You are learning to cooperate with others". Well, do you really expect teens to cooperate well with each others? Also what about the individuals who actually want to learn, that get placed in a group of friends that's fuck all about being serious. I at least find this hard, even harder when I have to cope with a fucking depression at the same time.
Haha, school gives you a very 1-dimensional view of socializing. You're forced to a building under the threat of confinement in a juvenile detention cell if you refuse, where you "socialize" with people who mostly don't even want to be there. Unlike in the post-school world where you are expected to interact with people of all age-groups, you only interact with people who are very precisely your age day-to-day during school. But let's get to the big kicker here: how do these people consider getting told to shutup by the teacher for talking to your neighbor while being lectured at socializing? I always thought it was a bit more complex than that. Razz

Who am I? Who are YOU?
(This post was last modified: 10-23-2015 08:19 PM by Sunbourn.)
10-23-2015 08:18 PM
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Japantakemyheart100 Offline
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Post: #8
The reason I'm here I guess

I do think it's important to cooperate with people, however only for business. That's basically the socializing you really need to survive in the future, in order to have a job. For school, I really really really hate socializing with people because I get extremely anxious because I'm hypersensitive and I don't want to offend anybody. I hate working in groups because I can easily finish everything alone without anybody (since I can't seem to trust them to a good job unless I have evidence from them). I really understand your depression. I'm currently experiencing it right now due to a huge workload and how behind I am, and I have been staying up till 3:00 am. People close to me have recommended that I go see a therapist due to mine having retired this year. I have gone through therapy several times and it haven't really worked for me. The reason is mostly due to me censoring every single piece that might seem strange or wrong to my therapist- I have huge trust issues. So. I really do get what you're going through.
12-16-2015 02:35 PM
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