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A few old classic dreams
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యూజర్ పేరు Offline
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A few old classic dreams

This is from December 28, 2009.

I was at school. It wasn't my school; it was my school on the inside, but with a different layout and the outside looked totally different. I remember it was summer outside. We were probably on the last few days of school, as the inside looked bare and there weren't many students inside. For some reason, there were papers scattered everywhere on the ground. You couldn't take one step without stepping on a discarded worksheet. I remember we were doing something with pasta, but I couldn't remember exactly what we were doing. I somehow ended up with a huge ball of pasta. I mean huge. It was at least three feet in diameter. Silver and turquoise pieces of rock dotted the ball, while a few pieces of tape held everything together. Treasuring it as if it were my son, I held on to it tightly and tried to get on the bus home. Right as I was about to get close to the entrance to the bus, though, it drove away. I forgot what happened next, but this one kid I know (he's this kid who everyone hates who goes through at least 7 packs of Kazoozles in math class and has a sick, perverted sense of humor) steals my ball of pasta. I chased him, following him to my old middle school. The middle school was vacant, except for a few teachers who were cleaning up. The kid ran in, ran into the 5th/6th grade portion of the school, and tried escaping. I managed to catch up and take him down, and I threw punches in vain as he refused to return my ball of pasta. Somehow, I ended up restraining and putting him and the pasta ball in a cheap '90s Fisher-Price wagon. We got in an elevator (we were somehow on the nonexistant 10th floor of the school), where I handcuffed him with a piece of rope. In one last act of vengeance, he unleashed a series of foul farts that turned the air green. Luckily, the elevator doors opened before I could inhale any, and I quickly brought him to the entrance of the school, where several students and a teacher or two there (a few of which looked like 20-year-olds) asked what was going on. As I explained, the kid escaped, said something I can't remember, then darted out of the school. Luckily, he didn't take my pasta ball. I looked outside, and he suddenly disappeared. While explaining the story to the kids at the school, the sky turned cloudy and black and it started thunderstorming. Some one of the seemingly-20-year-old fifth graders with extremely long orange dreadlocks asked me the name of the kid who stole my pasta ball, and asked if he was "up to it" again. I asked what he meant, and he pointed to the sky. In the sky, 12 golden monkeys, each donning a fez, formed a circle and started rotating around a central golden entity, eventually rotating so fast they turned into one giant glowing gold evil smiley face (a face similar to the one the pokemon Haunter has). The face launched itself at the school at an extreme force and turned into several glowing gold things that represented wind. I grabbed my pasta, told everyone to get out, and tried to run out of the school. I ran into the 5th/6th grade portion, and found it was suddenly different. It looked totally different from when I went there when I was in 5th and 6th grade. It turned into the dark, concrete basement of a warehouse, with one door at the end that was randomly placed across from a very deep pit that had a flowing water reservoir at the bottom. I was mere feet from the door when I looked behind me and the "wind" was only a few feet behind me. I jumped for the door and woke up.
08-02-2010 01:30 PM
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Re: A few old classic dreams

December 22, 2009.

I had a dream that I installed a new hard drive on my computer. Due to a malfunction, the hard drive produced several dozen midgets with small, cartoonish faces - their mouthes were lines and their eyes were dots. They were completely bald. They were no more than two feet tall and did nothing but ran around, bumping into things and people. I felt it was my duty to eliminate these things, so I got a drumstick and started slapping them across the face with it. They quickly grew angry and started to overwhelm me, so I ran downstairs and told my mom and dad about the weird hard drive midgets. My dad looked up the stairs and saw all the things, and said it's like they were "having a party" up there. My mom grabbed a small metal baseball bat and passed it to me, and we all ran upstairs. As soon as we got there, though, we found the second floor completely devoid of all of them. Then I looked into one of the bedrooms - this weird 17-year-old freshman who goes to my school was sitting on the bed, watching TV, when a hard drive midget comes up from behind the bed and starts beating him to a bloody pulp. All I could do was watch in horror as the midget kept punching and slapping him while the other guy did nothing. When he was done killing him, he started running towards me. I remember trying to slap it with a drumstick, as the metal baseball bat was in my mom's possession, and my mom and dad arguing over the midgets as I was trying to tell my mom to give me the bat. She finally listened to me and tossed me the bat, where I promptly killed the midget. Then I woke up.
08-02-2010 01:34 PM
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Re: A few old classic dreams

September 12, 2009.

I dreamed that the layer of dirt a foot underneath my neighborhood had turned into a thick, vomit-like mass of brown chunks and yellow. As a result, the government decided to create large holes in everyone's yards to try to get rid of this stuff (they called the drilling process "total mediation" or something like that; according to them, it's a very common and standard procedure). As a result, my family had to move to a new house. I had a choice of staying in the town I live in and going to the same school I currently go to, or moving to another town and attending some Christian school. I said I wanted to stay in the town we live in, and my dad started yelling at me about some nonsense about how I have no choice but to go to the Christian school and that we're leaving immediately. While packing up our stuff, about to move to our new house, I walk over to the empty lot across the street (where they're doing most of the drilling). I accidentally step in the brown-and-yellow liquid, and comment on its viscosity. One of the workers started talking about some weird shit about how great the stuff is and asked me if I wanted some. I saw him take a large scoop of the stuff and eat it right in front of me. At this point I'm about to puke due to the sheer disgustingness of the act, and I run back to my house. Suddenly my dream switches to third-person view. I'm watching myself run inside my house. Suddenly, everything starts zooming out and the entire world is covered in that brown and yellow liquid. Then it turns out it's all one big ad for Taco Bell, and their new tacos that have more beans and cheese than ever (revealing that the brown and yellow liquid was actually just beans and cheese).
08-02-2010 01:35 PM
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Re: A few old classic dreams

August 27, 2009.

I had a really weird dream. I was at a store, when I saw a section full of prosthetic dicks for sale. They were really weird dicks. They supposedly had "extra features a normal penis doesn't have". I browsed through the section and came across a dick that had some extra opening near the bottom that allowed one to vomit out of the penis instead of the mouth. It was also only supposed to be used for gay people. I bought it for some reason, and to put it on, I cut off my own dick and superglued the newly-bought prosthetic penis to the stump that was left. Some really bad stuff happened (probably because it was only for gay guys and I'm not gay), and I told my mom to look through the garbage to find my old dick so I could get it sewn back on. My brother found it, but it was all wrinkly and dead so I had to throw it away. I had to go back to the store with my dad to get a proper prosthetic dick that wouldn't cause any unwanted side effects, but my dad wouldn't let me go so I could "learn my lesson". I remember crying and telling my parents that I needed to get a new one because I "want to have a penis when I grow up". I begged him to go and was nearly in tears before he let me go. The only way was to walk there. As I was walking there, I got into a construction area. There was a pit full of dirty brown sand, and walking across it was the only way to safely get to the store. I walked across the sand, but immediately went through it. Only my head stuck out. I could walk across, but it was really hard to do. I fell down and was immediately buried in sand. I tried shouting and screaming for help, but nobody would help. Not even my dad. All he did was laugh at the sand because of "how much fun it is". Then I woke up.
08-02-2010 01:36 PM
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Re: A few old classic dreams

August 28, 2009.

I was playing Call of Duty: World at War. At least I thought I was. It turns out I was playing Nazi Zombies IRL. I was in a weird abandoned urban town full of highrises. I was in a gun store with a giant teleporter in the back of the place. The door was closed and the windows were barred, and I bought a Ray Gun off the wall and bought the door off its jamb. Then those flaming dogs started coming. There were only two this round, and no matter how many times I shot them, they wouldn't die. I started running. I ran into a house where I met my dad, my brother, and my uncle. They didn't have anything. We all ran into the attic, and the dogs cornered us. Then I can't remember what happened. Then we were outside in front of my dad's old high school. We thought the flaming dogs were gone, but then ran around the corner and started chasing after us again. We ran into a weird gym/shipping area facility full of people and trucks and loads of giant wooden crates. We ran in and locked the door. I walked around the place for a bit to see what it was like, and it was more like a garage than a school. I went back to the door of the place and looked through a window on it. The dogs were far away, but moving really fast towards us. I opened the door for a second to taunt them, and they ran inside and tried to attack us. I flipped over some tables and threw some boxes, and I managed to hit one. He started limping and whimpering and crying and I thought I had won, so I decided to kill it by giving it a good kick. That one kick made it really angry and it started to attack me. I was about to attack it back, but I looked out a nearby window. Outside was the Chicago skyline. We were pretty close to it. As I looked out the window, I realized the garage was actually the 10th floor of a huge building. Suddenly the buildings that made up the skyline turned into robots Transformers-style and started having a war. Then the theme song for some Japanese anime came on. "What the fuck is this shit," I asked a nearby person. She handed me a copy of Wired. I flipped open to a page and I saw that it was some weird-ass IRL anime that was having a "tour" across the world that would end on July 4th. The live-action anime was something like this: the creators would come to a city, do some weird shit to the buildings, then transform the buildings into robots of two opposing teams and record the fight and broadcast it live. I then turned into a giant nothing that somehow still existed, and all I could see was an infinite TV screen. It was like being a spectator in a Call of Duty game, but without the HUD. The intro to the show came on, and it was a CGI stop-motion thing with the theme song playing in the background and the entire story of how the show came to life. Apparently, there was a country. The country was entirely bad. Then half of the country became good, and seceded. Now there were two countries and they were at war with each other. One group of robot buildings was from the "good country", and the other from the "bad country". Then I woke up.
08-02-2010 01:37 PM
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