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August 2001 - June 2017

The School Survival Forums are permanently retired. If you need help with quitting school, unsupportive parents or anything else, there is a list of resources on the Help Page.

If you want to write about your experiences in school, you can write on our blog.

To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

The forums are mostly read-only and are in a maintenance/testing phase, before being permanently archived. Please use this time to get the contact details of people you'd like to keep in touch with. My contact details are here.

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MisanthropicIntrovert Offline
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Post: #1
Hello!

Salutations! My current place of residence is the grand country of the United States, and I attend the fantastic institution known as high school. According to Myers-Briggs I’m an INTJ, hence my username, and I also consider myself a misanthrope. In my spare time I enjoy reading, watching films and shows (Netflix, of course), hiking, and several other things that I can’t think of at the moment. Also, I’ve been roaming around on these forums for quite some time, and I just decided that it was time to create an account and become an active participant. That’s all I care to add in terms of personal stuff, so I suppose I should move on to the thing that unites us all: school.

Now, I’ve never been a huge fan of school, but now that I’m in the 9th grade something has sparked a sort of hatred for it. In middle school, I was told by all of my teachers that high school would be filled with vast learning opportunities and more freedom – how wrong they all were. High school has been anything but the aforementioned, instead continuing the long monotonous journey that was present in middle school. Throughout the duration of this year, I’ve felt unfulfilled and longing for more, and I can honestly say that this year has been the worst of my life (I’m not being hyperbolic, I swear). I feel like I’ve changed into this unhappy person that I never wanted, or even expected, to become.

Anyway, several months into the school year I began searching for alternatives and naturally I found homeschooling. Soon I started exploring the terrain known as my mother (that sounds oddly kinky) and inserted remarks here and there like: “I hate school” or “I wish I could be homeschooled”. Those generic statements did nothing to help and were largely ignored, except for the occasional reply of “I suffered through it, so you have to too.” Little did I know that soon I would gain some traction in an unexpected way. Months passed and I was quickly losing hope about it all, thinking I would just have to endure the next three years of high school, but my mother began asking questions, such as: “Are you O.K.?,” “You’ve seemed unhappy lately, are you sure you’re fine?,” or “If you ever want to talk about anything, just know I’m here, alright?.” So apparently my façade of happiness was cracking, revealing the unhappiness that was within, and my mother was beginning to notice. Recently, though, a new question emerged that could be the key to leaving school forever: “Would you be happier doing online school, [my name]? I just don’t want you to be unhappy and it seems like you’ve been struggling lately.” While it may not be homeschooling, I figure that it provides the perfect opportunity to introduce the idea to her now that she seems more open about everything.

Well, that’s the end of my introduction. I hope I can become an active and meaningful member of this community.
04-09-2015 06:52 AM
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Cianna200 Offline
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RE: Hello!

Hello, and welcome to school survival, sorry for the nonsense you have been receiving, welcome. Smile
04-09-2015 07:23 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #3
Hello!

Welcome Smile

Sounds like your mother really cares about your well-being. Online school is still pretty much the same stuff, but as far as I know you can at least do it at your own pace. So maybe you could rush through it and graduate sooner, even... if you want.

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04-09-2015 08:03 AM
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Dikont5 Offline
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Post: #4
Hello!

Wow, what a inspiring post! You'll really like this community. Sometimes there's barely any activity, but often times it's swell. Anyways, I'm glad you have the freedom of not going to school whereas I do not.Hug

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04-09-2015 08:05 AM
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brainiac3397 Offline
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Hello!

Welcome!

BTW you should know that I'm the activity around here so you better keep it down eh.

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04-09-2015 08:09 AM
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MisanthropicIntrovert Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Hello!

(04-09-2015 08:03 AM)SoulRiser Wrote:  Welcome Smile

Sounds like your mother really cares about your well-being. Online school is still pretty much the same stuff, but as far as I know you can at least do it at your own pace. So maybe you could rush through it and graduate sooner, even... if you want.

Yeah, but I still have time to use my incredible skills of persuasion and convince her to let me homeschool myself. After all, the next school year doesn't start for several more months.

(04-09-2015 08:09 AM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  Welcome!

BTW you should know that I'm the activity around here so you better keep it down eh.

Haha, I'll keep that in mind.
04-09-2015 10:03 AM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #7
RE: Hello!

Welcome to the forums. I'm an INTJ, too. I remember having a similar experience being told that school would be better, just until next year, when I was in 7th grade, and the following year I realized even more consciously how much of a waste of time school was. I researched homeschooling, but I couldn't convince my parents... I got the generic "you just have to do it" speeches, and it wasn't until years later that I learned about the GED and college and suddenly my parents were easier to win over.

Anyway, it's excellent news that you have a parent who's open to considering alternatives. I'm curious, how did she know about this online school she came up with? Did she learn about it through an advertisement, or her own research, etc?

(04-09-2015 06:52 AM)MisanthropicIntrovert Wrote:  Recently, though, a new question emerged that could be the key to leaving school forever: “Would you be happier doing online school, [my name]? I just don’t want you to be unhappy and it seems like you’ve been struggling lately.” While it may not be homeschooling, I figure that it provides the perfect opportunity to introduce the idea to her now that she seems more open about everything.

What SoulRiser said is true; most forms of online school are simply school, with subject classes, mandatory assignments, grades, and report cards, just delivered online. This can be better in some ways, but it's far from ideal for most true school-averse learners. If you have the option, and it's the only one, it's worth checking out, but there's another option to explore.

@Lisafromjackson and I are launching something called Catalyst Learning Network (check out the site), which offers an online replacement for school that's totally based on your interests, what you want to learn, and what you find relevant for life and/or necessary to accomplish specific goals.

This means that nothing is forced, and nothing is imposed in a one-size-fits-all manner. We have a network of teachers and mentors who also realize that school has major problems and is soul-crushing for some, and so we can facilitate all kinds of learning experiences that surpass what stock "online school" can provide.

As it happens, all the typical content of school is freely available on the web, including on Crash Course, Khan Academy, youtube in general, and lots of web sites, so why limit yourself to moving through it at according to someone else's schedule?

Anyway, it's something to think about. What are your ideas about what you might do in the future? Any particular interests you'd like to dive into instead of school?

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04-09-2015 08:46 PM
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Sunbourn Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Hello!

INTP here, pretty close! Online classes are certainly an improvement from being subjected to attending public school. The course content and choice is going to be pretty much the same as what you would expect from a typical public high school, but at least it grants you more freedom to do your work when you please. That means you should be able to get more flexibility in to pursue your real interests and experience life. Just make sure you don't fall in to the trap of going to online school and becoming completely socially isolated like some people (I) did.

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04-12-2015 11:27 AM
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MisanthropicIntrovert Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Hello!

Sorry for the incredibly late response, I've been beyond busy preparing for the upcoming state-mandated standardized tests.

(04-09-2015 08:46 PM)xcriteria Wrote:  I'm curious, how did she know about this online school she came up with? Did she learn about it through an advertisement, or her own research, etc?

I'm not quite sure how she stumbled upon it, but I assume that when she thinks of alternatives she just automatically jumps to another organized form of schooling and all she could think of was online schooling.

(04-09-2015 08:46 PM)xcriteria Wrote:  Any particular interests you'd like to dive into instead of school?

I'd love to devote more time to ballet because I don't have that much time for it with my current schedule, and it's the only extracurricular that's managed to give me some sense of fulfillment and happiness. I'm also interested in learning Danish because I find the language to be beautiful in both written and spoken forms. Also, being gay has really made me interested in queer culture and history, so I'd be quite happy if I had the opportunity to further explore that topic as well.
04-23-2015 11:18 AM
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Ilija.m Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Hello!

(04-09-2015 06:52 AM)MisanthropicIntrovert Wrote:  Salutations! My current place of residence is the grand country of the United States, and I attend the fantastic institution known as high school. According to Myers-Briggs I’m an INTJ, hence my username, and I also consider myself a misanthrope. In my spare time I enjoy reading, watching films and shows (Netflix, of course), hiking, and several other things that I can’t think of at the moment. Also, I’ve been roaming around on these forums for quite some time, and I just decided that it was time to create an account and become an active participant. That’s all I care to add in terms of personal stuff, so I suppose I should move on to the thing that unites us all: school.

Now, I’ve never been a huge fan of school, but now that I’m in the 9th grade something has sparked a sort of hatred for it. In middle school, I was told by all of my teachers that high school would be filled with vast learning opportunities and more freedom – how wrong they all were. High school has been anything but the aforementioned, instead continuing the long monotonous journey that was present in middle school. Throughout the duration of this year, I’ve felt unfulfilled and longing for more, and I can honestly say that this year has been the worst of my life (I’m not being hyperbolic, I swear). I feel like I’ve changed into this unhappy person that I never wanted, or even expected, to become.

Anyway, several months into the school year I began searching for alternatives and naturally I found homeschooling. Soon I started exploring the terrain known as my mother (that sounds oddly kinky) and inserted remarks here and there like: “I hate school” or “I wish I could be homeschooled”. Those generic statements did nothing to help and were largely ignored, except for the occasional reply of “I suffered through it, so you have to too.” Little did I know that soon I would gain some traction in an unexpected way. Months passed and I was quickly losing hope about it all, thinking I would just have to endure the next three years of high school, but my mother began asking questions, such as: “Are you O.K.?,” “You’ve seemed unhappy lately, are you sure you’re fine?,” or “If you ever want to talk about anything, just know I’m here, alright?.” So apparently my façade of happiness was cracking, revealing the unhappiness that was within, and my mother was beginning to notice. Recently, though, a new question emerged that could be the key to leaving school forever: “Would you be happier doing online school, [my name]? I just don’t want you to be unhappy and it seems like you’ve been struggling lately.” While it may not be homeschooling, I figure that it provides the perfect opportunity to introduce the idea to her now that she seems more open about everything.

Well, that’s the end of my introduction. I hope I can become an active and meaningful member of this community.

Welcome aboard to School Survival Forum
04-24-2015 06:40 AM
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lisafromjackson Offline
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Post: #11
Hello!

I am not sure how much satisfaction you will get from online classes...you might check us out, as xcriteria suggested. There are better ways to educate yourself, and it sounds like you have plenty of self-awareness and motivation.

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04-24-2015 07:06 AM
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MisanthropicIntrovert Offline
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Post: #12
RE: Hello!

(04-24-2015 07:06 AM)lisafromjackson Wrote:  I am not sure how much satisfaction you will get from online classes...you might check us out, as xcriteria suggested. There are better ways to educate yourself, and it sounds like you have plenty of self-awareness and motivation.

Yeah, but if it all comes down to the choice between online schooling or public schooling, then I'll happily choose the former option. Currently, though, I'm in the process of creating a curriculum to present to my mother in the near future so that I can hopefully show her I'm mature enough to handle something as immense as homeschooling myself. It's a long process, but I have a feeling it will all pay off in the end.
04-24-2015 11:30 AM
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raingi Offline
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Hello!

welcome to this forumsSmile
05-03-2015 12:29 AM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #14
RE: Hello!

Yeah, what we're doing with Catalyst really provides a third option beyond school and forms of homeschooling/unschooling that parents are often resistant to. We have teachers as part of our network who can talk to parents, and basically provide "online school" without being school.

We're planning to "enroll" some participants and provide an alternative to going back to school in the fall, but that means people winning over parents. Making a plan for them it's a good step.. let me know if you want any help.

Maybe we could do a hangout/chat focused on developing plans for presenting to parents. Several students here are working on those.. Sharing could help.

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05-03-2015 03:08 AM
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Alistoriv Offline
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Post: #15
Hello!

I used to be strongly INTP but now I'm walking the line between ISTP and ISFP

I did online school for a few months but it really wasn't my thing. If you're strongly self motivated you'll probably be fine though.

Ever heard of unschooling before? Seems like you'd like it based on what you've said so far.

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(03-20-2013 05:08 PM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  Stand up with pride and say "No! I will not be a McDonalds employee. I WILL BE A GARBAGE MAN!"

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05-03-2015 05:53 AM
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James Comey Away
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RE: Hello!

(04-09-2015 06:52 AM)MisanthropicIntrovert Wrote:  Salutations! My current place of residence is the grand country of the United States, and I attend the fantastic institution known as high school. According to Myers-Briggs I’m an INTJ, hence my username, and I also consider myself a misanthrope. In my spare time I enjoy reading, watching films and shows (Netflix, of course), hiking, and several other things that I can’t think of at the moment. Also, I’ve been roaming around on these forums for quite some time, and I just decided that it was time to create an account and become an active participant. That’s all I care to add in terms of personal stuff, so I suppose I should move on to the thing that unites us all: school.

Now, I’ve never been a huge fan of school, but now that I’m in the 9th grade something has sparked a sort of hatred for it. In middle school, I was told by all of my teachers that high school would be filled with vast learning opportunities and more freedom – how wrong they all were. High school has been anything but the aforementioned, instead continuing the long monotonous journey that was present in middle school. Throughout the duration of this year, I’ve felt unfulfilled and longing for more, and I can honestly say that this year has been the worst of my life (I’m not being hyperbolic, I swear). I feel like I’ve changed into this unhappy person that I never wanted, or even expected, to become.

Anyway, several months into the school year I began searching for alternatives and naturally I found homeschooling. Soon I started exploring the terrain known as my mother (that sounds oddly kinky) and inserted remarks here and there like: “I hate school” or “I wish I could be homeschooled”. Those generic statements did nothing to help and were largely ignored, except for the occasional reply of “I suffered through it, so you have to too.” Little did I know that soon I would gain some traction in an unexpected way. Months passed and I was quickly losing hope about it all, thinking I would just have to endure the next three years of high school, but my mother began asking questions, such as: “Are you O.K.?,” “You’ve seemed unhappy lately, are you sure you’re fine?,” or “If you ever want to talk about anything, just know I’m here, alright?.” So apparently my façade of happiness was cracking, revealing the unhappiness that was within, and my mother was beginning to notice. Recently, though, a new question emerged that could be the key to leaving school forever: “Would you be happier doing online school, [my name]? I just don’t want you to be unhappy and it seems like you’ve been struggling lately.” While it may not be homeschooling, I figure that it provides the perfect opportunity to introduce the idea to her now that she seems more open about everything.

Well, that’s the end of my introduction. I hope I can become an active and meaningful member of this community.

Hello!

I went through the same shit as you did sir. I'm also a INTJ (which is a pretty rare personality type as far as I hear; glad I'm not alone), and our nature prevents us from ever fully integrating at any level with factory model schooling. Like you, I went through the same stages - depression, anxiety, fear, anger, and boredom. It's pretty common for most teenagers, but it's worse for others.

At the very least your mother is beginning to see what's wrong - the fact that she actually acknowledged it as "suffering" is actually a pretty good starting point. I'd say continue to talk to her about online schooling. Online schooling tends to be more flexbile than school-as-it-is. It might be worth getting some kind of evidence of trauma.

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05-03-2015 06:02 AM
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