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The School Survival Forums are permanently retired. If you need help with quitting school, unsupportive parents or anything else, there is a list of resources on the Help Page.

If you want to write about your experiences in school, you can write on our blog.

To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

The forums are mostly read-only and are in a maintenance/testing phase, before being permanently archived. Please use this time to get the contact details of people you'd like to keep in touch with. My contact details are here.

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Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #1
Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

Many people are familiar with the idea of "coming out" as having a different sexual orientation or gender identity than others expect.

Ever notice how many parallels that has with opening up to parents about disliking school so much you're desperate for a change?

Even talking to people other than one's parents can be difficult.

One of the reactions some people get in trying to come out regarding sexuality or gender is people saying, "no you're not" or "it's temporary." That's also very common when it comes to school-dislike.

If you want, try watching this video with advice about coming out in the traditional sense -- but imagine it being about talking to parents about being so miserable in school and really wanting another option:



Watch on YouTube

Thoughts?

Peter Gray & allies launching the Alliance for Self-directed Education

ASDE Newsletters: #1 Announcement | #2 History of ASDE | #6 Education Liberation


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02-04-2015 01:17 AM
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MrAnonymous Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

School can never be better than it is right now if we blame students and don't try to improve everything else.

"If you wanna know how not secure you are, just take a look around. Nothing's secure. Nothing's safe. I don't hate technology, I don't hate hackers, because that's just what comes with it, without those hackers we wouldn't solve the problems we need to solve, especially security."

-Fred Durnst

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02-05-2015 02:00 PM
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JenniMiller Offline
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Post: #3
Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

I get people telling me that school is THE ONLY WAY to succeed and that IF YOU DON'T GRADUATE HIGH SCHOOL YOU'LL BE STUCK IN A DEAD END JOB FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE OMG SOIDJFGOSDJGIOSDJIG. People seem genuinely offended by the idea that one size does not fit all and that some students want to steer their education in a different direction, one that does not involve propaganda and repression.
02-06-2015 01:45 AM
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lisafromjackson Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

For many people staying in school is a means toward failure. Lots of People do their learning despite school, not because of it.

Dialogue On Education ... where students and adults meet to hash out issues related to school.
02-13-2015 03:37 AM
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craxyguy562 Offline
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Post: #5
Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

My parents already know I hate school.

[Image: gUJMoO7.png]

Hidden stuff:
Homework brings the hell of school home.

Gwedin Wrote:  Dat feel when you get home, realise it's Friday, and itch your buttcrack.
02-13-2015 04:09 AM
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lisafromjackson Offline
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RE: Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

Crazy guy, how to they respond?

Dialogue On Education ... where students and adults meet to hash out issues related to school.
02-13-2015 04:15 AM
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craxyguy562 Offline
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RE: Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

(02-13-2015 04:15 AM)lisafromjackson Wrote:  Crazy guy, how to they respond?

Long lecture that basically is saying that I am wrong to hate school and soon I will regret not liking school.

[Image: gUJMoO7.png]

Hidden stuff:
Homework brings the hell of school home.

Gwedin Wrote:  Dat feel when you get home, realise it's Friday, and itch your buttcrack.
(This post was last modified: 02-13-2015 04:26 AM by craxyguy562.)
02-13-2015 04:25 AM
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no Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

"You will not like not liking something you don't like!"

Flawless.

Hello, traveler.

This is an ancient account I have not used in a long time. My views have changed much in the intervening months and years.

Nonetheless, I refuse to clean it up. Pretending that I've held my current views since the beginning of time is what we in the industry call a lie. Asking people to do so contributes to moralistic self-loathing. "See, those people have nothing damning! I do! I'm truly vile!"

Because you can never be a good person with a single blemish on the moral record, I thought that simply entertaining some thoughts made me irredeemable. Though I don't care for his writing style, William Faulkner presents a good counterexample. He went from being a typical Southern racist to supporting the civil rights movement. These days we'd yell at him for that, probably.

People are allowed to change their views.

Nevertheless, this period of my life has informed some of how I am today. In good ways and bad ways. To purge it would be to do a disservice to history. Perhaps it will not make anyone sympathetic, but it may help someone understand.

If, after reading all this, you still decide to use the post above as evidence that I am evil today, ask yourself if you have never disagreed with the moral code you now follow. In all likelihood you did, at some point. If some questions are verboten, and the answer is "how dare you ask that," don't expect your ideological opponents to ever change their minds.
02-13-2015 06:40 AM
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lisafromjackson Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

I want it known for the record that I typed craxyguy but it autocorrected to crazy guy. Smile

Dialogue On Education ... where students and adults meet to hash out issues related to school.
02-13-2015 06:43 AM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #10
Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

That seems like the common pattern. The idea of quitting school, however much it's disrupting actual learning, is associated the negative concept of being "dropout" and doing nothing.

But you don't have to do nothing once you're free from school -- you can do all kinds of things... and still go to college if you want.

How many of you have shown your parents Ken Robinson's Changing Education Paradigms video?

@crazyguy, you did, right? What happened?

Peter Gray & allies launching the Alliance for Self-directed Education

ASDE Newsletters: #1 Announcement | #2 History of ASDE | #6 Education Liberation


School Survival & Catalyst Learning Network featured on AlternativestoSchool's blog
“Mom, Dad, can I stop going to school?”

Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking when the Stakes are High

Hidden stuff:
02-13-2015 06:58 AM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #11
Coming out as disliking school or wanting to quit

Several parents who pulled their kids out of school have suggested watching this documentary Class Dismissed with your parents.

Class Dismissed is about a family that chooses to homeschool/unschool (with interviews with various homeschoolers and educators.)

Homeschooling is often associated with some kind of parent-run school-at-home, but there are so many other ways to do things, like the Liberated Learners model... and so many paths to success in life (however you define that.)



Watch on YouTube

Class Dismissed is currently being screened in select locations (Chicago, Phoenix, and East Brunswick, NJ dates are coming up), or available as $75-$250 DVD screener kit, for showing screenings (whether in your living room, or in a theater in your city.)

It'll be released as a regular film later this year, but if you want to get a copy sooner, PM me about the possibility of borrowing a screener DVD.

See more clips from the film, and from screenings of it, at the Class Dismissed YouTube Channel.

Peter Gray & allies launching the Alliance for Self-directed Education

ASDE Newsletters: #1 Announcement | #2 History of ASDE | #6 Education Liberation


School Survival & Catalyst Learning Network featured on AlternativestoSchool's blog
“Mom, Dad, can I stop going to school?”

Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking when the Stakes are High

Hidden stuff:
(This post was last modified: 02-13-2015 07:04 AM by xcriteria.)
02-13-2015 07:01 AM
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