"You have to go to college"

[Missile]

I'm just going to a somewhat tame rant on my parents and their views on my grades and my future.

I have been noticing that my algebra and my Spanish grades have been going downhill since the start of 2015. Especially my Spanish grade, (I got three 40s in a row for tests, I did manage to correct one of them and get a 64.) My grades are good compared many people at my school (I usually get mid 80s to low 90s) but my mom will treat a low 80 or anything in the 70s as a failing grade.
I have been trying VERY HARD to make sure that I don't get a 70 in Spanish but it looks like I'm failing at that goal (no pun intended), my parents also keep saying that I don't "try hard enough". Try hard enough? If I wasn't trying hard enough I would have a 30 in Spanish and Algebra.

My parents also keep saying that I "have to go to college" so I can get a good job and support my family. My problems with this:
1. I don't want to have kids
2. I don't want to go to college, I don't want to be the only student there that's not an ultra-PC, spine-less leftist and I don't want to spend the next 10 years of my life trying to pay off a student loan.
3. I'm not one of those people who can study for hours and hours and hours on end, and that's apparently required for college. (This is also why that grounding me for 6 weeks is not going to be effective if I get an "unacceptable" grade in Spanish)
And that's why I've given up any hope for me going to college and why I plan on joining the Army.

So what can I tell my parents when my report card comes in the next few weeks and they start griping over me "not trying hard enough" or that "I need to go to a college"?

[isolatedsystem]

I feel you. I have been trying hard on memorizing history ( entire book for 1 test this week) and other subject which I study for too. Rest I can handle . It's so much pressure ....

[brainiac3397]

Uhm. Hmm.

I disagree with no.3
I don't really study hours upon hours for my classes. Course since my classes interest me, and I research this sort of stuff during my free time anyway(so it's no different that I do it for class), I guess it could just be my bias. Okys ut depends on your major(expect studying for sciences and maths. It's just a natural fact that these disciplines require significantly more time dedicated to them.)

I guess 1 thing is notice is that k-12 study was/is often "memorize this" whereas most college work is "research this/analyze this". Course if your prof gives multiple-choice and stuff, consider yourself lucky cause that means class will be a bit easier than if you were to write essays(my anthro final was answering 4 questions with multiple-page essays...by hand, in class)

I don't have an ultra-pc nor do I give a crap. Generally college is more mature than HS, though that doesn't mean it's completely different. There is still the usual student stuff going on, like cliques and gossiping and parties. The main difference is mainly the fact that they don't make big issues about it(so basically more respect for your deicions compared to HS).

But yes, lots of leftists in colleges. Especially most profs. There are some pockets of non-leftists, often coming from conservative or religious families(assuming they weren't oppressed to the point of rebelling and joining the other side). It depends on the location of your college and demographics for most part(like my college is in a predominantely WASPy area, so there might be slightly more conservatives than average)

You're gonna spend the next X years of your life paying something. Unless America becomes less of a corporatist state intent on squeezing you dry. Course student debt sucks but corporatist America tends to reward those who go through the insanity of paying a ton for higher education.

As for 1, I dun know. It's up to you, maybe you'll change mind maybe not.(I consider the decision not to have kids as a product of corporations attempting to control the "breeding" of those who are not wealthy, thus make them easier to control! Ok maybe not necessarily but I lean towards having offspring vs not)

[xcriteria]

From AlternativestoSchool.com: Attending College Without Standard K-12 Schooling

It is possible!

Also, college isn't for everyone, though I recommend trying some form of it (at least free online MOOCs.)

Maybe try showing your parents this letter to parents, from Lisa Nalbone, mom of Dale Stephens, who founded UnCollege.

a Letter to Parents and Hackademics

I'm curious how your parents might react to those things... I'm trying to build a toolkit for parent conversations.

What might you like to do in the future? Only some things require college, especially these days. And, much of the content of college is available online if you know where to look.

Also, some colleges are very flexible, and it's possible to do the equivalent of college by talking shorter programs (like UnCollege, though it's expensive) or various other ways.

A key question is, what do you want to learn? If you want to learn writing, for example, we could put together our own writing class, even hire a writing teacher. It doesn't have to take place "in college."

[Missile]

(02-03-2015 06:08 AM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  Uhm. Hmm.


You're gonna spend the next X years of your life paying something. Unless America becomes less of a corporatist state intent on squeezing you dry. Course student debt sucks but corporatist America tends to reward those who go through the insanity of paying a ton for higher education.

As for 1, I dun know. It's up to you, maybe you'll change mind maybe not.(I consider the decision not to have kids as a product of corporations attempting to control the "breeding" of those who are not wealthy, thus make them easier to control! Ok maybe not necessarily but I lean towards having offspring vs not)

I decided to not have kids through experience with my two little brothers and my little sister, I don't think I can handle the constant crying for X or Y without snapping, or worrying about if they do X dangerous thing at daycare/at my house while I'm at work.

My mom graduated from TX Tech in '93, she didn't pay off her debt until '04, I don't recall that she got a monetary reward for it. Her major is useless at the job she works today.



I don't know if I was clear on this or not, but I meant "politically correct" with "PC".

[Missile]

And I very hard time trying to focus when I try to study for something that dosen't interest me. When I try to study the Spanish vocab or Spanish rules, I usually end up zoning-out about some random thing half-way through the list

[brainiac3397]

Yeh I probably didn't read that part as carefully. That PC can be pretty annoying. Throw in the whole "black people are victims" beliefs and suddenly being white and male is a crime

As for kids, I don't really think you should base it off siblings. While it might sound cliche, they do say that parenthood is something different. Like I said though, I have a bias towards establishing a family.

[Missile]

Update: I'm doing well in algebra right now, but my Spanish grade is going even further down the drain

[lisafromjackson]

I think the whole thing about college being all lefty and PC is mostly not true. I found all kinds of people at college. Are you saying you don't think conservatives want to pursue an education as much as liberals?

[brainiac3397]

It was recently discovered, with evidence and official study, that academia is a pretty harsh environment for right-wingers and conservatives. There are colleges that don't even have any professors that identify as Republicans.

So while students might be variations, the fact that most/all of the faculty is lefty AND the fact that colleges are more likely to suppress conservatives.

[lisafromjackson]

I would need to see this "official" study. And college is most definitely what you make it.

---

There is always the possibility that the more one learns, the more one realizes the flaws in conservatism... but that's JMHO

[brainiac3397]

When ideas can differ by spectrum, it's unlikely there is ever a better one. Shall we break the egg from the top or bottom?

Regardless just look at the curriculum and courses of colleges. It's all liberal stuff. Any conservative classes are often just criticisms. Being something of a nationalist, and a leaning towards fascism, I see the amount of or lack of proper study of such ideologies without frequent criticism and degradation. Sure, neonazis are a bit wacko but every ideology has its crazies. Its all a systematic attempt at destroying ideologies. You degrade them, disprove them and delegitimize them. Ridicule and insult. The purpose isnt a educational aspect (what propenent of education would support the revision and destruction of ideas?), its an attempt to erase something due to their own agenda.

When people are afraid to publicly side with an opposing idea, its not because they saw the flaws. Its because institutions seek to suppress them and their beliefs. In fact the very concepts of liberal and conservative assist in bunching things together as one target under a single broad label. Americans are quite guilty of this.

[Rule_BreakerXVIII]

Going through college in the US sounds like a horrible idea...I'd suggest taking a few courses and then getting a job before college even if you do want to go..that way you won't end up in debt.

Quote:My parents also keep saying that I "have to go to college" so I can get a good job and support my family.

If they are paying or trying to pay for the college...be suspicious. Be very suspicious. Seriously, get out from under them before they trap you for life and start using you as a money-making machine.

[Missile]

(02-12-2015 05:25 PM)Rule_BreakerXVIII Wrote:  

Quote:My parents also keep saying that I "have to go to college" so I can get a good job and support my family.

If they are paying or trying to pay for the college...be suspicious. Be very suspicious. Seriously, get out from under them before they trap you for life and start using you as a money-making machine.

They were talking about my wife/kids family, not my parents, but they do want to pay for my college [/i]

[c00ldud3]

Im fucking scared about my future because with college you're damned if you do, damned if you don't...at least in this country.

[vonunov]

Don't go to college if you don't want to, but it's not a conspiracy. Could be fun. I want to go for the experience and exploration if nothing else.

I think there's just some miscommunication between the generations, or maybe some ideas that need translating into the modern way. Not too long ago, college was the respectable option, and a four-year degree was worth something. If you didn't do so well in academics, that was okay, though; you could go to trade school, or maybe join the military, or just be a terminal failure at life.

Note how I said the four-year degree was worth something. It's common as dirt now. A four-year degree is now often a bare minimum. You know how people will talk about how some places will hire anyone with a pulse? They now check your degree instead of your pulse. This doesn't mean you need one. Depends.

Think not about what they're saying specifically (you should go to college), but about what it means to them, where it leads. What do they want you to get out of it? What are they afraid you'll miss out on if you don't go? If you try to get at the heart of what results they want, you could get into a discussion about other ways you might accomplish those.

They don't necessarily want you to go to college per se, they just want you to be successful and set yourself up with a skill set that'll keep you stable and better off than they ever were.

c00ldud3 Wrote:Im fucking scared about my future because with college you're damned if you do, damned if you don't...at least in this country.

Relax, man. Check this out.

18 years old, first private sector job was doing remote PC tech support. No college, no certifications. I fluffed up my personal/incidental IT experience and sent in a resume without a job history. Got it and worked from home making US$13.75.

21, no college, no certs, worked ATT tier 2 tech support for $15.

Now 24, no college except for part of a CCNA course priced in the hundreds of dollars at the community college. I got halfway through studying for my CCNA before I landed this job, never finished the CCNA, and got a few Check Point certs as a requirement of the job (after I'd already got it). Enterprise firewall tech support. Started at $18.50, now at $23 and change. Growth opportunities here are endless. It only gets better.

This is more than I've ever made before, but it's not super, so the point isn't really to talk about my pay, but to show that you can come up with well over a living wage without ever setting foot on a campus. This worked out for me because I started out with some kind of skill set, so, you know, you do still need something to use, but it doesn't have to be a degree, nor previous professional experience.

Edit: OP, join the military if you want, it's a great experience. But do your research. I'm not sure whether you specifically want to join the Army or that's just the word you happened to use. Some people like the Army for specific reasons. Some people join the military because the alternatives are undesirable. In cases like that, the Air Force, the least military of the US branches, would probably be more enjoyable. The Navy is nice too, though they have a lot of customs that I suspect this crowd here would find pointless and frustrating.

Missile Wrote:When I try to study the Spanish vocab or Spanish rules, I usually end up zoning-out about some random thing half-way through the list

Adderall, man. You'll get that shit done. I don't know what you've heard about it but I swear it's a fuckin' miracle. You should talk with your parents or counselor about this sort of thing as they may be more inclined to help if they think you're not just lazy.

[Ami]

Sorry for not reading everything (yet), but why army? If you like the idea, sure, that's great, but why must you go to army if you don't want college? If you don't want neither, can't you just skip both?

I'm not an American so maybe I am missing something, but I live in Israel in which army is mandatory, and I can say I would have gladly avoided that experience. So point is, if you want to do Army do it, if not, don't see why you have to just because college also sucks.

[Missile]

One reason why I want to join the army (USMC to be specific) because I want them to whip my ass into shape, and get G.I. benefits if I decide to go to college after my service. I don't want to see my parents go broke trying to pay for my and my little brother's tuition while trying to raise my second little brother and little sister

[brainiac3397]

Anything but USMC. Theyll turn you into a brick. Try army or navy or whatever.

[thewake]

Join the French Foreign Legion.

[c00ldud3]

brick as in dumb as a brick or brick as in brick hard

because brick hard would be good am i rite

[Missile]

My mom is now trying to talk me out of enlisting and is trying to make me get a ROTC.

About the marines being "dumb as bricks". The marines that I have met are very libertarian and they are anti-government to a certain extend. (Irony? That's for you to decide)

[brainiac3397]

The ones you have met are unlikely to be the ones ordering and training you.

[Missile]

Sergeant Hartmans?
They aren't allowed to put their hands on you and insult you to the extend he did nowadays

[brainiac3397]

I'm not saying the USMC is like "Full Metal Jacket". You won't have drill sergeants sticking their boots up your ass, using live-rounds in training, and beating on you. Verbal abuse is pretty much the limit because these trainers themselves are supervised and very professionally trained. All other punishments basically fit within the guidelines.

What I am saying is that the USMC culture is that of being hardcore masculine jock tough guy. In fact its saturated in it, which is because of the high espirit de corp of the USMC. With such cases, it's not uncommon that an asshole will easily be protected by other assholes because the assholes all believe to be comrades fighting together and that anyone not assholes like them are the real assholes.

While the military as a whole is about conforming, the USMC takes it to the next level because simply the USMC puts conforming at the TOP of their branch culture.

[vonunov]

They're not allowed to swear at you anymore. They might say things that you think are mean, but these are meant to motivate you. If you have trouble realizing that they're just doing a job and you take it personally, you'll have a bad time. Before you go in, find out about the SOP for your branch's instructors and how to report violations. Just because there's an SOP doesn't mean abuse never happens.

If your mom wants you to go to ROTC and will help out with that, it sounds like a good plan. It's a much easier life as an officer, I hear. If you're worried you wouldn't like what a line officer does, you could look into going from ROTC to Warrant Officer.

[Missile]

My experiences with bullying forced me to grow a thick skin, I don't really take insults personally anymore

[thewake]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_war_crimes

[brainiac3397]

(02-24-2015 06:42 AM)vonunov Wrote:  They're not allowed to swear at you anymore. They might say things that you think are mean, but these are meant to motivate you. If you have trouble realizing that they're just doing a job and you take it personally, you'll have a bad time. Before you go in, find out about the SOP for your branch's instructors and how to report violations. Just because there's an SOP doesn't mean abuse never happens.

If your mom wants you to go to ROTC and will help out with that, it sounds like a good plan. It's a much easier life as an officer, I hear. If you're worried you wouldn't like what a line officer does, you could look into going from ROTC to Warrant Officer.

Like I said, verbal abuse. Not profanity. Oh and let's not forget the physical abuse of all that training.

Warrant Officership, from my understanding, is an area for those with special skills. Technically speaking though, they're below officers(duty and authority wise). You have a whole lot of choices as an officer so I don't see why you'd want to jump into warrant officer. Warrant officers are "warranted" mainly due to expertise or technical abilities(or in case of US army, to fly helicopters).

If you have the ability and support, do ROTC. Starting as an officer has better pay and you get some degree of independence. As an enlisted personnel, you're at the whims of your superiors with pretty much a "do, not think" sort of responsibility for a period of time. At least as an officer you'll have some comforts.

Though your relationship with enlisted folks will be restricted cause AFAIK the US military frowns upon too much fraternizing with enlisted folk. One of my issues with the military is the restriction on relationships.

I'm not sure I'd be considered patriotic enough to agree not to hit on some hot enlisted chick as an officer. Just thinking this, I'd probably be considered someone who would behave in "conduct unbecoming of a military officer" or whatever. Also might be a bit more independent than is safe to be in the military. I did once hope to join but as my personality developed, expanded and exaggerated, I realized someone like me would never last.

As for war crimes, I think it's pretty apparent the USA has done lots of shit so bad, one might question why you'd ever want to be a citizen of a country like it. At this point, I've begun to imagine the US as some spoiled brat that thinks it's always right, but when it's wrong it just shrugs it off or blames someone else.

Like Republicans who threaten to shut down the DHS by not voting on funding, and then saying "We don't think it'll cause a big national security issue". The very same people who'd throw a psychotic fit if Obama suggests cutting DHS budget by 5% is also saying that by not giving the DHS money to function, and by making it's employees work without pay, is definitely not going to cause a decrease in efficiency.

Welcome to America!