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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

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Life of an Attention Whore
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Drunkard

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Post: #121
RE: Life of an Attention Whore

i read this blog because i am incapable of doing anything worthwhile with my time
02-14-2017 03:48 AM
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Gwedin Offline
dumb shithead

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Post: #122
Life of an Attention Whore

and i love you for it

i have over 1000 dollars for the first time today. weird feeling
02-14-2017 02:32 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #123
Life of an Attention Whore

not gonna have over 1000 dollars soon because i owe the social welfare department a few hundred the CUNTS

you know what this is just gonna be my personal finances thread from now on.

im kidding btw that'd be lame
02-14-2017 04:40 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #124
Life of an Attention Whore

second week done and dusted, worked saturday yet again but im not complaining because half days don't exhaust me and i get time and a half pay. i am complaining about the fucking physical pain though. my fingers and back mainly. i already mentioned the back pain i think but my fingers are fucking stiff and sore and even slightly tightening my grip on something makes it hurt like a cunt. the peeps at work i've talked to have the same shit. one guy apparently takes this shit that just numbs his hand so he can work without pain. i don't notice the pain when i'm working though because i'm busy focusing on just keeping up with the fucking line and wiping sweat from my face with often blood covered gloves

i got moved station and i'm on a more "physically intense" one now vs the more knife oriented one from before. this is good for two reasons: 1. i'm shit with a knife and keeping my knife sharp 2. i get paid a dollar more here so i'm making goodish money now i guess. on a week where i work a saturday i should take home roughly 700 kiwibucks. minus under 200 for rent and food and i can save over 500 a week (!!!!!)

i'm beginning to look into driving lessons. they cost like 70 bucks for a lesson (no more sweet 500 a week wah wah) and they provide a car which is sweet. im gonna learn in an automatic which is stupid in the longterm because everyone here drives manuals but i'm a slow, stupid, easily frustrated learner so unless i wanna end up spending a shit load on lessons and having a generally shit time, this is good for me i think. i don't want stress in my life and learning in a manual with mummy dearest was just hell. i hate gears. yes, i'm a wuss.

i'm eating a lot of unsalted peanuts now because i need more protein in my diet.
02-18-2017 12:31 PM
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Drunkard

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Post: #125
RE: Life of an Attention Whore

I always hoped you were the more fucked up one out of the two of us, but here I am reading about money, driving lessons and unsalted peanuts.
How does having your shit together feel like?
(This post was last modified: 02-18-2017 06:45 PM by Username.)
02-18-2017 06:45 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #126
Life of an Attention Whore

feels,uh, anxious, worrisome etc. feels like something will come out of nowhere and knock me off my feet and ruin everything for me

i'd be probably dead if not for that loony bin. it was like the "push" i needed to get shit moving or something
02-19-2017 05:09 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #127
Life of an Attention Whore

hoping i can get a job as a scaffolder off this fella i live with whose boss is desperate for labourers

i wanna avoid the off-season bullshit this slaughterhouse job comes with, less hand pain would be nice too (more back pain though, yay!)
02-21-2017 06:26 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #128
Life of an Attention Whore

on second thought i talked to the supervisor and the off season is way away at the end of july and i'm starting to get used to working here so i'll stay for now. will look for another job or whatever like two months before the off season begins idk but being a scaffolder labourer or w/e probably wouldn't work oout because i'm not very strong and honestly since i'm getting used to the slaughterhouse i don't really wanna go through the whole "new job" shit just yet

third week done and dusted. will book a driving lesson tomorrow. wanna begin next sunday. i hope they do sundays lel cuz it's the only day im not bloody busy

an a completely unrelated note, fucking chinese cunts so FUCKING many of the loud disgusting insects living here now. petey boy and i had a fun yarn about them the other night. this fat korean chick is even worse than the chinese though.

i dunno if i'm even racist tbh. i think i just hate foreign cultures or whatever. like i don't mind if you're african or whatever as long as you act like us but all these chinese cunts living here don't do that it's fucking GAY idk fuck your shit culture, be western or something. or idk just stop eating with your mouth open and speak english and STOP BEING SO LOUD AND ARROGANT like fuckkng manners are a thing you absolutely daft cunts (as though the two-faced bastards don't know perfectly well what they're fucken doing)
(This post was last modified: 02-25-2017 10:31 AM by Gwedin.)
02-25-2017 10:14 AM
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Drunkard

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Post: #129
RE: Life of an Attention Whore

Fat korean chick lol good luck
02-25-2017 07:12 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #130
Life of an Attention Whore

more fucking chinese moving in and a malaysian chick who's the size of a fucking child

god damn colonisation this shite is

ironic

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(This post was last modified: 03-03-2017 05:25 PM by Gwedin.)
03-03-2017 05:17 PM
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Gwedin Offline
dumb shithead

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Post: #131
Life of an Attention Whore

just had nearly all of my clothes stolen off of the washing line here

got the owner looking into security footage rn

fucking scum

edit: found the fella. apparently he seemed in a rush and just grabbed everything on that line (he had some clothes next to mine). dunno how legit this is but he texted the owner, apologised and is gonna bring them back in (tomorrow i assume? it's kinda late now)

bleh. he's one of the cool fellas here, in the process of moving out. hope it was a genuine mistake and not ill intent or w/e. hope i get my fucking clothes back at least :|
(This post was last modified: 03-04-2017 07:50 PM by Gwedin.)
03-04-2017 05:54 PM
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Drunkard

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Post: #132
RE: Life of an Attention Whore

people are faggy
03-04-2017 08:22 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #133
Life of an Attention Whore

lmao fuck this lying cowardly rat
03-05-2017 02:32 PM
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Gwedin Offline
dumb shithead

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Post: #134
Life of an Attention Whore

that gut wrenching emotion when you open a bookmark then open it again because ur a creature of habit and have a non existent attention span and forgot u just opened it
03-08-2017 05:59 PM
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 Thanks given by: the Analogist
Gwedin Offline
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Post: #135
Life of an Attention Whore

i have work

i have short day

ugh

less money
03-10-2017 05:08 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #136
Life of an Attention Whore

comfy saturday, window open with the rain banging away on the next building over's roof right below my window

i mean id love to dry my washing but guess it'll have to wait for tomorrow
03-11-2017 06:50 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #137
Life of an Attention Whore

guy at work lost his hand today. scary shit tbh

also the union is p cool
03-17-2017 05:08 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #138
Life of an Attention Whore

one of the chinese living here apparently has to go home because she couldn't find a job

imagining myself in her situation and it is simply gut wrenching

now there's only 8 chinese peeps living here vs 4 white dudes!!!
03-17-2017 07:57 PM
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brainiac3397 Offline
Machiavellian Amoeba

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Post: #139
Life of an Attention Whore

Aint nuffin wrong with China.

North Korea on the other hand,.

Personality DNA Report
(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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03-18-2017 09:17 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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Life of an Attention Whore

i respekt the fuq outta CHOINA

i just don't like chinese people here very much. it gets tiresome hearing chinese spoken more than english. god forbid you try to speak to them, you end up acting out what you want.
03-18-2017 09:23 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #141
Life of an Attention Whore

should probably buy a car lol

eh

i'll buy two who wants one my shout
03-21-2017 06:33 PM
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James Comey Away
Banished Oldfaf in Exile

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Post: #142
Life of an Attention Whore

I'm getting my car soon damn it

RIP GWEDIN
RIP URITIYOGI
RIP NIGHT
RIP VONUNOV
RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

[Image: Nas-One-Love.jpg]

Stop jerking off to porn and whining and do something about it

Make School Survival Great Again - MSSGA

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03-22-2017 04:41 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #143
Life of an Attention Whore

idek where to start in finding a car
lol what should i buy lol how do i buy lol wtf is rego and warrant?!?!

nah mummy dearest or chaza will giz us a hand there

what kind are you looking at & how much you budgeting? money isn't really the problem for me it's the fact i can't drive yet but idkkkkkkkkkkk i have to get a car apparently for the driving test so???????

tits
03-22-2017 12:58 PM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #144
Life of an Attention Whore

Good news Gwedin, I may get laid with a very attractive girl in the near future.

RIP GWEDIN
RIP URITIYOGI
RIP NIGHT
RIP VONUNOV
RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

[Image: Nas-One-Love.jpg]

Stop jerking off to porn and whining and do something about it

Make School Survival Great Again - MSSGA

Hidden stuff:

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03-23-2017 05:49 AM
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 Thanks given by: Subb
Gwedin Offline
dumb shithead

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Post: #145
Life of an Attention Whore

uhm, congratulations i think

fucking back pain is so bad

gonna see if i can do something about my sore feet at work at least. check out the shop tomorrow for some soles or w/e for me gumboots. need to go to the chemist to check this thing mummy dearest rec'd for my back pain but uggghhh. i should just see the doctor at work but i really really don't like doctors

note to self: get extension cord too.

this rubbish post was made by a tired sore gwedinho
03-25-2017 07:12 PM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #146
Life of an Attention Whore

she has the most amazing ass in the world. No seriously, her ass is incredible.

get that damn back pain checked out before it kills you. I used to have chronic back pain back in 2013 but it vanished, huh

RIP GWEDIN
RIP URITIYOGI
RIP NIGHT
RIP VONUNOV
RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

[Image: Nas-One-Love.jpg]

Stop jerking off to porn and whining and do something about it

Make School Survival Great Again - MSSGA

Hidden stuff:

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03-26-2017 08:22 AM
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Drunkard

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Post: #147
RE: Life of an Attention Whore

go fuck her then
03-27-2017 05:08 AM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #148
Life of an Attention Whore

I will dude.

the world is full of pimps n hoes

RIP GWEDIN
RIP URITIYOGI
RIP NIGHT
RIP VONUNOV
RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

[Image: Nas-One-Love.jpg]

Stop jerking off to porn and whining and do something about it

Make School Survival Great Again - MSSGA

Hidden stuff:

[Image: BallsofSteel2.png]
[Image: mg_michelle_2020.png]
03-27-2017 07:18 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #149
Life of an Attention Whore

ow ow ow it hurts so much
03-29-2017 04:03 PM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #150
Life of an Attention Whore

what does your dick

RIP GWEDIN
RIP URITIYOGI
RIP NIGHT
RIP VONUNOV
RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

[Image: Nas-One-Love.jpg]

Stop jerking off to porn and whining and do something about it

Make School Survival Great Again - MSSGA

Hidden stuff:

[Image: BallsofSteel2.png]
[Image: mg_michelle_2020.png]
03-30-2017 01:53 AM
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