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I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

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i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school
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fucking done Offline
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Post: #1
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

i hate my school so fucking much

considering getting sent to a hospital again so i can take some time off from my dumb school and maybe bitch so much about it that they decide to send me to a different school i literally Cannot take it there i feel like im gonna have a major breakdown if i go tomorrow id tell my mom but she doesnt really care shes going to send me anyways so whats the point???????

but if i go to a hospital again they might not listen to me about my meds and put me on seroquel and theyd probably send my family a fuckton of bills too ugh shit FUCK

i am just So So Scared of everything and everyone i want to be alone i never want to have to see anybody ever again

AND IF I HAVE A BREAKDOWN MY SCHOOL WILL PROBABLY KEEP ME THERE LONGGER FUCKIGN FUCK I AM SO MAD RIGHT NOW I WANT TO SCREAM I HATE EVERYTHING
02-17-2014 10:11 AM
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craxyguy562 Offline
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Post: #2
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

I can understand how you feel. With all the pressure school puts on it's student and work it gives I'm pretty their are many kids who would do almost anything to not have to go to school including getting sent to the hospital and for some death.

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02-17-2014 10:28 AM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #3
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

Oh my, Yikes. I don't know how to respond.

As a general rule, please remember, suicide and self-harm are NOT the answers.

Second, if you're really thinking you're going to have a mental breakdown in school, I'd say when you start to feel it, get out of the class immediately. That's what I do whenever I'm feeling like I'm having a mental breakdown.

At this point, are there any clinics that you may be able to go to? It really seems like you're having a hard time at this point, and I'm not sure if my post is really the right thing here.

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02-17-2014 10:30 AM
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fucking done Offline
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Post: #4
RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

(02-17-2014 10:30 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  Oh my, Yikes. I don't know how to respond.

As a general rule, please remember, suicide and self-harm are NOT the answers.

Second, if you're really thinking you're going to have a mental breakdown in school, I'd say when you start to feel it, get out of the class immediately. That's what I do whenever I'm feeling like I'm having a mental breakdown.

At this point, are there any clinics that you may be able to go to? It really seems like you're having a hard time at this point, and I'm not sure if my post is really the right thing here.

i kknow

my school has a room where u can go if ur upset but most ppl just use it to sleep,,, i feel like someone would be sleeping and id just have to stay in my classroom crying thats what usually happens

what do you mean by clinics
02-17-2014 10:51 AM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #5
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

Any kind of place where you can get immediate mental help.

RIP GWEDIN
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02-17-2014 11:06 AM
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fucking done Offline
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RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

(02-17-2014 11:06 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  Any kind of place where you can get immediate mental help.

i dont tgink we have anywhere like that other than the hospital and even then its not immediate it takes fucking hours for them to get somone to evaluate you and i dont want them to see the cuts i have on my leg right now ugh
02-17-2014 11:34 AM
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craxyguy562 Offline
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Post: #7
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

My school does not have a place for you if you suffering a mental break down they only really care for physical problems.

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02-17-2014 11:49 AM
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fucking done Offline
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RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

(02-17-2014 11:49 AM)crazyguy562 Wrote:  My school does not have a place for you if you suffering a mental break down they only really care for physical problems.

most public schools dont, my school is a special needs school
02-17-2014 11:52 AM
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craxyguy562 Offline
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Post: #9
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

Weird even though I attempted suicide several time, have to see a therapist, and had several mental break downs. No one ever suggested sending me to a special needs school. Guess I'm too normal.Shrug

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02-17-2014 12:06 PM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #10
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

Well, shit...

* Gwedin hugs alienrat.
02-17-2014 12:29 PM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #11
RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

"A dilemma is a problem offering two possibilities, neither of which is practically acceptable." (Wikipedia)

That's what you're describing here... every possibility you describe sounds bad.

But, I think there are ways out of a lot of bad situations if you can figure them out. And as you can see, many of us are here to help out to whatever extent we can.

Hopefully you can find ways to get people in your in-person world to understand as well.

(02-17-2014 10:11 AM)alienrat Wrote:  i hate my school so fucking much

considering getting sent to a hospital again so i can take some time off from my dumb school and maybe bitch so much about it that they decide to send me to a different school i literally Cannot take it there i feel like im gonna have a major breakdown if i go tomorrow id tell my mom but she doesnt really care shes going to send me anyways so whats the point???????

Maybe you can build up a case for changing schools, piece by piece?

Explaining how you feel can be a step toward that.

But, why won't your mom listen?

Is there anyone she might listen to?

(02-17-2014 10:11 AM)alienrat Wrote:  but if i go to a hospital again they might not listen to me about my meds and put me on seroquel and theyd probably send my family a fuckton of bills too ugh shit FUCK

Yeah, those are some good reasons to stay out of the hospital, if possible.

I suggest finding a different way to get what you want, which is to get out of that school. Maybe you could develop an alternative plan?

(02-17-2014 10:11 AM)alienrat Wrote:  i am just So So Scared of everything and everyone i want to be alone i never want to have to see anybody ever again

I think a lot of us know that feeling, but aren't there some benefits of seeing people, sometimes? Smile

(02-17-2014 10:11 AM)alienrat Wrote:  AND IF I HAVE A BREAKDOWN MY SCHOOL WILL PROBABLY KEEP ME THERE LONGGER FUCKIGN FUCK I AM SO MAD RIGHT NOW I WANT TO SCREAM I HATE EVERYTHING

That makes your whole situation a real predicament. School is stressing you, but it's supposed to be the "treatment..." doesn't make sense.

Can you talk to anyone in your in-person life about this problem, and see if you can negotiate a plan to take a break from school, switch to public school, or do online learning?

And, maybe you can find another way to make friends, outside of school?

(Even if you want to be alone... you might find some people you enjoy being around some of the time.)

I hope things go better for you tomorrow than you expect. Things will get better, even if it takes some time.

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02-17-2014 05:31 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #12
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

Hug

There has to be another way. Show your mom all the info on alternatives you can find? I suppose she'd probably be more open to online school than most other things. Or maybe a democratic school, if there is one nearby you?

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02-18-2014 05:51 AM
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fucking done Offline
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Post: #13
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

the only schools they want to send me to are this one and a public school with an emotional disturbances program which i pray wont suck ass like this school.
02-18-2014 06:13 AM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #14
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

Is there a possible way to look up the emotional disturbances program? Sounds promising but I wouldn't have my hopes too high: it's in a high school.

RIP GWEDIN
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02-18-2014 06:24 AM
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RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

(02-18-2014 06:24 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  Is there a possible way to look up the emotional disturbances program? Sounds promising but I wouldn't have my hopes too high: it's in a high school.

Yeah, if possible, find a way to research it, and the school. Ideallt, vusit and even find a qay to talk to current students about their experiences (or former students.)

That probably won't be easy, which is one reason there's a need for more open dialogue about school experiences, surveys, and ways to.change existing programs to not be disasters.

Beyond those two options, maybe there could be some other option... don't give up even if those seem like the inly way. Smile

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02-18-2014 06:47 AM
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fucking done Offline
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RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

(02-18-2014 06:24 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  Is there a possible way to look up the emotional disturbances program? Sounds promising but I wouldn't have my hopes too high: it's in a high school.

im in middle school not high school and its probably going to suck ass but hopefully i will actually be able to talk to people who are somewhat like me maybe idk but emotional disturbances sounds more like me than special needs
02-18-2014 06:56 AM
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RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

(02-18-2014 06:47 AM)xcriteria Wrote:  
(02-18-2014 06:24 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  Is there a possible way to look up the emotional disturbances program? Sounds promising but I wouldn't have my hopes too high: it's in a high school.

Yeah, if possible, find a way to research it, and the school. Ideallt, vusit and even find a qay to talk to current students about their experiences (or former students.)

That probably won't be easy, which is one reason there's a need for more open dialogue about school experiences, surveys, and ways to.change existing programs to not be disasters.

Beyond those two options, maybe there could be some other option... don't give up even if those seem like the inly way. Smile

im tryin to research it but theres barely anything omg
02-18-2014 06:58 AM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #18
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

Hmm.... is it possible to visit that said school sometime and get more information?

RIP GWEDIN
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RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

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02-18-2014 07:07 AM
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fucking done Offline
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RE: i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

(02-18-2014 07:07 AM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  Hmm.... is it possible to visit that said school sometime and get more information?

my principal is going to let me visit after the next meeting if my treatment team thinks im ready and they probably will say im not ready bc they all fucking hate me
02-18-2014 07:15 AM
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Alistoriv Offline
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Post: #20
i really want to diie tonight so i dont have to go to school

I know this feeling, sometimes getting away from shit for a while is nice. The only hospital near me is p nice but they use coal for heat which I don't like :/

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(03-20-2013 05:08 PM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  Stand up with pride and say "No! I will not be a McDonalds employee. I WILL BE A GARBAGE MAN!"

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02-18-2014 01:10 PM
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