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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

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School Survival Forums / The Lounge / General Talk / Blogs v / sad lyfe

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sad lyfe
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #31
RE: sad lyfe

Anxiety app?
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02-19-2014 09:27 AM
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Post: #32
RE: sad lyfe

this geodon decrease is making me anxious and i also feel weird and a teacher asked me if i got any work done and i was like not really i had a med decrease and its making me feel weird and she was like should i be worried and i was like yes i am going to go crazy and then she said something about hugs. i really feel like somethings going to happen its scary
02-20-2014 06:47 AM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #33
RE: sad lyfe

It's not unusual to feel weird during a change in dose. Your brain might take some time to adapt to it.

Some of your anxiety may be from your uncertainty over what's going to happen. If you can, try to just give it some time.

If you're extremely uncomfortable, talk to your doctor about possibly stepping down in dose more slowly. (Like 70 instead of 60.)
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02-20-2014 07:16 AM
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Post: #34
RE: sad lyfe

today was kinda cool i was more social than i usually am but i kept feeling weird all day. my moms gonna take a walk with me to get ice cream... i like ice cream but the staff at my school scare me a lot they talk about things that make me never want to leave the house so idk if im going to go or not.
02-21-2014 05:08 AM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #35
RE: sad lyfe

What do the staff talk about?
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02-21-2014 05:22 AM
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Post: #36
RE: sad lyfe

(02-21-2014 05:22 AM)xcriteria Wrote:  What do the staff talk about?

things like kidnappings and murders

i went and i got cotton candy ice cream with rainbow sprinkles and i was at the dollar store and some lil kid came up to me like "excuse me sir i like ur hair" and it made me so happy :~) i was seen as smth other than female and i got a compliment. hell yea
02-21-2014 06:16 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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Post: #37
sad lyfe

(02-21-2014 06:16 AM)alienrat Wrote:  
(02-21-2014 05:22 AM)xcriteria Wrote:  What do the staff talk about?

things like kidnappings and murders

Da fuck?
02-21-2014 12:39 PM
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sad lyfe

my only friend killed herself jesus fucking christ
02-21-2014 10:46 PM
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sad lyfe

she was the only person i knew who was actually like me
02-21-2014 11:31 PM
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Post: #40
RE: sad lyfe

*Hansgrohe gives alienrat a big hug Hug
RIP GWEDIN
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Stop jerking off to porn and whining and do something about it

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02-22-2014 04:00 AM
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Post: #41
RE: sad lyfe

*alienrat hugs hansgrohe back

i bought a cute blouse and kitty tights today. ill take a picture when i get home!
02-22-2014 04:02 AM
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sad lyfe

[Image: vq7gpu.jpg]
i look like a goth schoolgirl
02-22-2014 08:26 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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sad lyfe

Oh, wow. That's terrible.

* Gwedin hugs Vesper.
02-22-2014 09:13 AM
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Alistoriv Offline
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Post: #44
sad lyfe

D:
I hope you feel better :(
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(03-20-2013 05:08 PM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  Stand up with pride and say "No! I will not be a McDonalds employee. I WILL BE A GARBAGE MAN!"

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02-23-2014 02:19 AM
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Post: #45
RE: sad lyfe

i feel like someones out to get me and theyre going to kill me and ive been feelig them watching me lately i am so scared i am freaking out i Do Not Want To Die i want to call 911
02-23-2014 12:15 PM
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Alistoriv Offline
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Post: #46
sad lyfe

Have you seen the person or is it just a feeling?
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(03-20-2013 05:08 PM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  Stand up with pride and say "No! I will not be a McDonalds employee. I WILL BE A GARBAGE MAN!"

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02-23-2014 01:44 PM
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Larryington Offline
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Post: #47
sad lyfe

alienrat Wrote:i feel like someones out to get me and theyre going to kill me and ive been feelig them watching me lately i am so scared i am freaking out i Do Not Want To Die i want to call 911

If someone is out to harm you, then let me ask this: Do you own anything that might help you defend yourself? For example: a knife or a firearm?
02-23-2014 02:37 PM
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xcriteria Offline
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Post: #48
RE: sad lyfe

I don't think anyone is out to harm alienrat... there's certainly no need to talk about knives and firearms.

@alienrat, I hope you're feeling better... Can you explain more about how those feelings started?
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02-23-2014 03:08 PM
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sad lyfe

i havent seen them...
i dont have anything everything is locked up in my house
i am feeling a lil better, i just hear people talking about stuff like that all the time and it scares me
02-24-2014 06:24 AM
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sad lyfe

i think i was having tactile hallucinations last night. i felt worms crawling all over my legs it was scary at first when i thought there were actually worms but when i saw there were no worms i couldnt stop laughin.
02-24-2014 09:12 AM
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sad lyfe

i spent all night last night in the er, my dad took me at 9pm and we got back around 3am. at least i didnt end up in a mental hospital tho
02-28-2014 09:41 AM
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xcriteria Offline
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RE: sad lyfe

What led to you being in the ER?
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02-28-2014 09:44 AM
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sad lyfe

i kept threatening to kill myself
02-28-2014 09:53 AM
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Gwedin Offline
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sad lyfe

Why?
02-28-2014 10:19 AM
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Post: #55
RE: sad lyfe

(02-28-2014 09:53 AM)alienrat Wrote:  i kept threatening to kill myself

Who do you keep threatening and why?
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02-28-2014 01:10 PM
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RE: sad lyfe

(02-28-2014 01:10 PM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  
(02-28-2014 09:53 AM)alienrat Wrote:  i kept threatening to kill myself

Who do you keep threatening and why?

it was 2 my dad and i was feeling really depressed
03-01-2014 08:35 AM
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sad lyfe

How did he react?
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(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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03-01-2014 11:01 AM
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sad lyfe

he got rlly scared
03-04-2014 10:35 AM
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sad lyfe

aaa jesus. i feel like theres no fun on this site anymore, everything is so serious. it doesnt seem like much of a support forum anymore.... idk maybe im just being dumb. im not leaving im just idk
05-29-2014 09:15 AM
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RE: sad lyfe

Why do you think SrsBsn came to existence...which by the way does not exist.
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05-29-2014 09:43 AM
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