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August 2001 - June 2017

The School Survival Forums are permanently retired. If you need help with quitting school, unsupportive parents or anything else, there is a list of resources on the Help Page.

If you want to write about your experiences in school, you can write on our blog.

To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

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"Go get a girlfriend!"
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Post: #31
"Go get a girlfriend!"

Not surprising. I notice (stereotypically) that the popular kids are most likely to do drugs, sex, etc. It's all part of "looking cool".

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10-02-2013 02:02 PM
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brainiac3397 Offline
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Post: #32
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

(10-02-2013 01:27 PM)Hansgrohe Wrote:  Up until really recently it was taboo to talk about safe sex in schools and schools encouraged pure abstinence. Not worked out exactly like they hoped it would.

My college was real blunt about safe sex and alcohol and partying.(According to the college admins, they aren't against partying alcohol or sex but are against doing it irresponsibly. And that if you don't want the college public safety raiding your party and getting everyone in trouble, then don't do anything that has others calling the public safety. The admins know when parties happen and where, but don't actively stop them unless a student calls in a complaint, be it noise or something else).

They told us where students could get condoms,birth control and dental dams(and to teach students what a dental dam was and what for if asked). Let me remind you my high school treated us gender-neutral in the sense any talk of sexuality was "deferred". I doubt anyone in my class knew what a dental dam was(or specifically what it had to do with sex). Or what a condom looked like.

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(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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10-02-2013 02:12 PM
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Post: #33
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

My sister used to tell me similar things in middle school, and I was in the same position you're in now. I ignored the advice, eventually right before 9th grade started I met this one girl and was with her for two years so I guess things didn't work out too bad for me.


Middle school relationships don't last very long but it's about gaining more dating experience that you can apply to later relationships. That way when you get into something serious you won't be awkward about it and you'll have an understanding of how relationships work. The girl I dated for those two years was my first serious girlfriend and while I was awkward at first due to lack of past dating experiences, it worked out decently.


Middle school was the absolute worst time of my life thus far. Perhaps it had something to do with dating and making friends, maybe not. Either way, don't worry about it. If you don't want a relationship then don't get into one and tell anybody who suggests otherwise that you're not looking for something serious at the moment and leave it at that.
10-03-2013 03:22 PM
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Post: #34
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

I hate the idea of just "getting a girlfriend" like it's a casual thing to do. I'm not sure if it's me or the Asperger's talking, but it's a very hard, sophisticated thing to do. And anyone who can just go into a relationship does not give it the amount of thought I do.

The "get laid" part also annoys me. To me, physical romance is both very important, and unimportant. It serves as convincing the body that you have a connection. That connection must be built psycologically, then the body can crave that other person more. Then, sex happens when you unconditionally love each other. Call me weird, but that's how I think.

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10-03-2013 03:48 PM
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Missile Offline
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Post: #35
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

Being autistic myself makes me socailly awarkward as well. But since many relationships have a high risk of breaking up, I just don't get into them

Wake up people, and look at life around you
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10-04-2013 07:01 AM
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Missile Offline
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Post: #36
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

(10-03-2013 03:48 PM)SubCulture Wrote:  I hate the idea of just "getting a girlfriend" like it's a casual thing to do. I'm not sure if it's me or the Asperger's talking, but it's a very hard, sophisticated thing to do. And anyone who can just go into a relationship does not give it the amount of thought I do.

The "get laid" part also annoys me. To me, physical romance is both very important, and unimportant. It serves as convincing the body that you have a connection. That connection must be built psycologically, then the body can crave that other person more. Then, sex happens when you unconditionally love each other. Call me weird, but that's how I think.

I think relationships are very difficult too, here's what bugs me, in the past, you had sex when you wanted to have a family and if you loved your spouse, but now, it's has become a hobby and teens do it, leading to the abortion crap. If people didn't have sex for fun and teenagers wouldn't have sex, would you think we would be fighting over abortion?

but about relationships, 10 year old girls are crying because thier boyfriends broke up with them and cutting theirselves because JB became a pothead.

I cried because I couldn't find that one Lego in my giant box of Legos when I was building something

Wake up people, and look at life around you
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10-04-2013 07:07 AM
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Post: #37
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

(10-04-2013 07:07 AM)Missile Wrote:  If people didn't have sex for fun

"Oh yes, I'm determined to not enjoy this sex at all."

I'm sorry, but that's what I immediately thought.

Hello, traveler.

This is an ancient account I have not used in a long time. My views have changed much in the intervening months and years.

Nonetheless, I refuse to clean it up. Pretending that I've held my current views since the beginning of time is what we in the industry call a lie. Asking people to do so contributes to moralistic self-loathing. "See, those people have nothing damning! I do! I'm truly vile!"

Because you can never be a good person with a single blemish on the moral record, I thought that simply entertaining some thoughts made me irredeemable. Though I don't care for his writing style, William Faulkner presents a good counterexample. He went from being a typical Southern racist to supporting the civil rights movement. These days we'd yell at him for that, probably.

People are allowed to change their views.

Nevertheless, this period of my life has informed some of how I am today. In good ways and bad ways. To purge it would be to do a disservice to history. Perhaps it will not make anyone sympathetic, but it may help someone understand.

If, after reading all this, you still decide to use the post above as evidence that I am evil today, ask yourself if you have never disagreed with the moral code you now follow. In all likelihood you did, at some point. If some questions are verboten, and the answer is "how dare you ask that," don't expect your ideological opponents to ever change their minds.
10-04-2013 07:13 AM
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Post: #38
"Go get a girlfriend!"

Aren't high school relationships pretty much the same as all other relationships, except that they occur between 2 people who just so happen to be in high school?

I think dating & relationships are 99% stupid, but there are exceptions. Well, most of the time the exceptions are probably 2 people who knew each other a long time before they started 'dating'. So they skipped all the stupid shit. I dunno, but that's how I imagine it would work. Razz

Quote:The "get laid" part also annoys me. To me, physical romance is both very important, and unimportant. It serves as convincing the body that you have a connection. That connection must be built psycologically, then the body can crave that other person more. Then, sex happens when you unconditionally love each other. Call me weird, but that's how I think.
I like the way you think.

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10-04-2013 07:33 AM
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Post: #39
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

(10-04-2013 07:07 AM)Missile Wrote:  
(10-03-2013 03:48 PM)SubCulture Wrote:  I hate the idea of just "getting a girlfriend" like it's a casual thing to do. I'm not sure if it's me or the Asperger's talking, but it's a very hard, sophisticated thing to do. And anyone who can just go into a relationship does not give it the amount of thought I do.

The "get laid" part also annoys me. To me, physical romance is both very important, and unimportant. It serves as convincing the body that you have a connection. That connection must be built psycologically, then the body can crave that other person more. Then, sex happens when you unconditionally love each other. Call me weird, but that's how I think.

I think relationships are very difficult too, here's what bugs me, in the past, you had sex when you wanted to have a family and if you loved your spouse, but now, it's has become a hobby and teens do it, leading to the abortion crap. If people didn't have sex for fun and teenagers wouldn't have sex, would you think we would be fighting over abortion?

but about relationships, 10 year old girls are crying because thier boyfriends broke up with them and cutting theirselves because JB became a pothead.

I cried because I couldn't find that one Lego in my giant box of Legos when I was building something

I think it's not because kids have sex for fun but more or less the lack of awareness of safe sex on high school campuses. Slowly, safe sex is being taught more and more, but it really still is a taboo in most areas.

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10-04-2013 08:21 AM
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brainiac3397 Offline
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Post: #40
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

When taboo and from what they see on film tv, hormones are chanting "SEX SEX! SEX!". Then they realize that its really messy business and nothing tv film. Course by then the damage may have already been done.

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(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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10-04-2013 10:55 AM
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Post: #41
"Go get a girlfriend!"

(10-04-2013 10:55 AM)brainiac3397 Wrote:  When taboo and from what they see on film tv, hormones are chanting "SEX SEX! SEX!". Then they realize that its really messy business and nothing tv film. Course by then the damage may have already been done.

Not to mention that pornography makes sex seem like absolute bliss, thus increasing peoples' (mainly males, I'd think) craving for it.
10-04-2013 03:53 PM
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Post: #42
"Go get a girlfriend!"

And makes some males think a lot of men have big penises. Then the average of 5-6in(which is more then enough to get the job done) suddenly gets considered not manly and you're supposed to be lugging around a foot long pole -_-

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(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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10-05-2013 02:27 AM
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Post: #43
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

You are socially awkward and you like to be alone... seems like I am not the only one here... welcome to the club, brah...

As cheesy as this feels like: It comes with the time. Eventually in your life you will meet one girl (Not in a fucking school of course) that you will really love.

I can not assure it, but I have high hopes with things like that... even though I myself am a lonely fucking piece of shit...

Good luck in the future of not giving a shit, mate
10-10-2013 06:28 AM
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Post: #44
"Go get a girlfriend!"

At this point, I don't bother with high school dating. I think SubCulture said it the best. A lot of people act as if school dating is this sort of game or casual thing to do that all teenagers must do, but for socially awkward people, it's really hard to do. Talking and making relationships is hard enough (though I'm less awkward than I used to be), but a semi-romantic relationship is something else.

And yes, I know that eventually I might meet a girl that I can actually get along with. There's definitely plenty of fish in the sea, but in school the fish are seemingly in certain types of varieties. I know that this world is big, and that my perception of people should, out of all places, definitely not be set by school.

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10-10-2013 09:10 AM
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Post: #45
"Go get a girlfriend!"

There is nothing for me to say here that others have not already said. High school dating is an exercise in futility.

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10-10-2013 10:24 AM
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Post: #46
"Go get a girlfriend!"

I'm bringing this back.

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04-13-2017 04:56 PM
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Post: #47
"Go get a girlfriend!"

I remember back when bumping threads was greatly frowned upon. Glad that's apparently over.
04-13-2017 08:28 PM
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Post: #48
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

I hate the word girlfriend because the letters r, l, f should not be bunched together without vowels in the middle of a word like that. It's disgusting. The church should issue an official statement.

Hello, traveler.

This is an ancient account I have not used in a long time. My views have changed much in the intervening months and years.

Nonetheless, I refuse to clean it up. Pretending that I've held my current views since the beginning of time is what we in the industry call a lie. Asking people to do so contributes to moralistic self-loathing. "See, those people have nothing damning! I do! I'm truly vile!"

Because you can never be a good person with a single blemish on the moral record, I thought that simply entertaining some thoughts made me irredeemable. Though I don't care for his writing style, William Faulkner presents a good counterexample. He went from being a typical Southern racist to supporting the civil rights movement. These days we'd yell at him for that, probably.

People are allowed to change their views.

Nevertheless, this period of my life has informed some of how I am today. In good ways and bad ways. To purge it would be to do a disservice to history. Perhaps it will not make anyone sympathetic, but it may help someone understand.

If, after reading all this, you still decide to use the post above as evidence that I am evil today, ask yourself if you have never disagreed with the moral code you now follow. In all likelihood you did, at some point. If some questions are verboten, and the answer is "how dare you ask that," don't expect your ideological opponents to ever change their minds.
04-13-2017 09:09 PM
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Post: #49
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

(04-13-2017 09:09 PM)no Wrote:  I hate the word girlfriend because the letters r, l, f should not be bunched together without vowels in the middle of a word like that. It's disgusting. The church should issue an official statement.

Then you'd hate photosynthesis, Pennsylvania, crystal, rhythm, Cynthia, scythe, syndrome, acetylcholine, dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane, symphony, chemosynthesis, motorcycle, Gypsy, chlorophyll, Armstrong, synthesis, dysprosium, psycho, catchphrase, dimethyltryptamine, countryside, encyclopedia, myrtle, worldly, brightly, chrysalis, asphyxiation, sphygmomanometer, psychosis, lightly, psychology, dysphoria, psyche, krypton, nymph, ashlyn, backscratcher, lynching, strychnine, psychedelic, psychic, Twelfthtide, synthetic, cherrystone, idiosyncrasy, offspring, phencyclidine, psych, asphyxiate and symptoms

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04-14-2017 12:15 AM
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RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

(04-13-2017 08:28 PM)Jop Wrote:  I remember back when bumping threads was greatly frowned upon. Glad that's apparently over.

TBH I think bumping threads is kinda useful in a way in case someone wants to start a thread and there's already one and they can read older posts as well.

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04-14-2017 03:54 AM
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Post: #51
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

When I was in Year 8, I wanted to have a boyfriend because everyone else in my class had either a boyfriend or a girlfriend. I couldn't get one and I thought I was the worst student in my class because I didn't have a boyfriend. My mum kept telling me that I still shouldn't have one, unless I want to become pregnant as a teenager. I didn't want that. I just wanted to be like the rest of the class. Then, I became friends with a boy from my math class. He wasn't my boyfriend though. We were friends for about four months, but then people in my DT class asked me if I love him. I told them I did, but didn't want to tell him. So the next day in math class, they told him and he wasn't my friend anymore. Last year in January, he started being mean to me and told me to kiss my art teacher. She was very sick back then and I was crying every day until she came back. I eventually turned from straight to bisexual and from bisexual to a lesbian. There was a girl who was also my friend and also became my friend when my art teacher was sick, but we were friends for nearly a year. One day, she wanted to be my girlfriend, but that didn't happen. Instead, I broke friendship with her because she was stealing my lunch money, using my print credits, making me bring her to her lessons, making me do her Geography homework for her, telling me to never talk to my DT teacher because SHE HATES HER, pulling me away from an English teacher who I like, but does not teach me while we were talking and threatening to sexually harass her, kill her, kidnap her son, kill her husband, kill the rest of her family, kill me and kill all the teachers except her two favourite teachers. She also forced me to swear and ask teachers how old they are and said that if I don't swear, I will die, while if I don't ask teachers how old they are, the English teacher will die. The girl also said that all teachers except her two favourites have to lick her butt. I not only stopped being friends with her, but also reported her. At the beginning of Year 9 (The year I'm currently in), I had some teacher crushes. Recently, my classmates have been going around telling people that I love three teachers, two female, one male. Yes, I love the two female ones, but not the male one. In fact, I don't talk to him much and barely know him. Unfortunately, two months ago, I hugged my Form Tutor and it made me the worst student ever because she doesn't like being hugged. I can't stop staring at my teachers. My art teacher told me that I should only stare at my boyfriend like that and said that I need to be 21 years old to have one. Later in the Parents Evening, my Pastoral Leader told me that I need to be 24 in order to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend. And yes, I know that there is no chance I will ever be with one of the teachers I love (Even after I turn 18). Three are married, two have boyfriends, one follows a religion which does not allow her to be a lesbian and... one of them is 27 and I'm 14. The teachers I just mentioned are all females. I decided to accept the fact that there is nothing I can do about the things I just mentioned. I'll try to find some people who are one year younger than me, but not people my age or a year older because most of my classmates are being rude to me and Year 10's are evil. Or I won't ever get a boyfriend or a girlfriend. Who cares? I'm stupid, I'm ugly and my parents gave me the worst name anyone could ever have. Because of that, I hope I'll never be in a relationship. Even after I turn 18.

doge
(This post was last modified: 05-20-2017 06:58 AM by Marlena403.)
04-18-2017 06:45 AM
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Post: #52
"Go get a girlfriend!"

I used to feel the same way about relationships back then tbh. I've been through a lot of crap, don't worry. TBH I'm still a bit cynical on relationships but it wears off as you grow older.

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04-18-2017 07:21 AM
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Lucas Gallindo Offline
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Post: #53
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

I'm gay and I don't fucking like it at fucking all. People force me to talk to girls and I pretend to like them, I pretend to be an assexual for the walking-dildo classmates, my eyes look at men without my permition and people start to wonder because of it, I'm not vry sociable and I don't let people aproach (methaphorically) so much to me, because they can see my shames.
Most people I know are homophobic and make dirty jokes about gays (including my own father). I think I'm arromantic, too.


Educationally, sociabiliy is very important. When somebody moves from school to HS, everybody asks about socialization. We don't socialize that much at school, why would there be any significant defference for us?

GallindãoBiggergrin
Learn is cool, but not in a school!
04-19-2017 10:06 AM
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 Thanks given by: Avatar Korra , The man
James Comey Away
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Post: #54
"Go get a girlfriend!"

I'm curious Lucas, what part of Brazil do you live? (I remember you mentioned living in Brazil).

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RIP NIGHT
RIP VONUNOV
RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

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04-19-2017 02:35 PM
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Marlena403 Offline
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Post: #55
RE: "Go get a girlfriend!"

(04-18-2017 06:45 AM)Marlena403 Wrote:  When I was in Year 8, I wanted to have a boyfriend because everyone else in my class had either a boyfriend or a girlfriend. I couldn't get one and I thought I was the worst student in my class because I didn't have a boyfriend. My mum kept telling me that I still shouldn't have one, unless I want to become pregnant as a teenager. I didn't want that. I just wanted to be like the rest of the class. Then, I became friends with a boy from my math class. He wasn't my boyfriend though. We were friends for about four months, but then people in my DT class asked me if I love him. I told them I did, but didn't want to tell him. So the next day in math class, they told him and he wasn't my friend anymore. Last year in January, he started being mean to me and told me to kiss my art teacher. She was very sick back then and I was crying every day until she came back. I eventually turned from straight to bisexual and from bisexual to a lesbian. There was a girl who was also my friend and also became my friend when my art teacher was sick, but we were friends for nearly a year. One day, she wanted to be my girlfriend, but that didn't happen. Instead, I broke friendship with her because she was stealing my lunch money, using my print credits, making me bring her to her lessons, making me do her Geography homework for her, telling me to never talk to my DT teacher because SHE HATES HER, pulling me away from an English teacher who I like, but does not teach me while we were talking and threatening to sexually harass her, kill her, kidnap her son, kill her husband, kill the rest of her family, kill me and kill all the teachers except her two favourite teachers. She also forced me to swear and ask teachers how old they are and said that if I don't swear, I will die, while if I don't ask teachers how old they are, the English teacher will die. The girl also said that all teachers except her two favourites have to lick her butt. I not only stopped being friends with her, but also reported her. At the beginning of Year 9 (The year I'm currently in), I had some teacher crushes. Recently, my classmates have been going around telling people that I love three teachers, two female, one male. Yes, I love the two female ones, but not the male one. In fact, I don't talk to him much and barely know him. Unfortunately, two months ago, I hugged my Form Tutor and it made me the worst student ever because she doesn't like being hugged. I can't stop staring at my teachers. My art teacher told me that I should only stare at my boyfriend like that and said that I need to be 21 years old to have one. Later in the Parents Evening, my Pastoral Leader told me that I need to be 24 in order to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend. And yes, I know that there is no chance I will ever be with one of the teachers I love (Even after I turn 18). Three are married, two have boyfriends, one follows a religion which does not allow her to be a lesbian and... one of them is 27 and I'm 14. The teachers I just mentioned are all females. I decided to accept the fact that there is nothing I can do about the things I just mentioned. I'll try to find some people who are one year younger than me, but not people my age or a year older because most of my classmates are being rude to me and Year 10's are evil. Or I won't ever get a boyfriend or a girlfriend. Who cares? I'm stupid, I'm ugly and my parents gave me the worst name anyone could ever have. Because of that, I hope I'll never be in a relationship. Even after I turn 18.

Oh, and this girl who was my fake friend, tried to make me embarrass my art teacher two days ago.

doge
05-20-2017 07:00 AM
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James Comey Away
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Post: #56
"Go get a girlfriend!"

Ugh this entire thread was cringe. I was a total nice guy back in the day.

RIP GWEDIN
RIP URITIYOGI
RIP NIGHT
RIP VONUNOV
RIP WES/THEWAKE
RIP USERNAME

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Stop jerking off to porn and whining and do something about it

Make School Survival Great Again - MSSGA

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05-20-2017 07:42 AM
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