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Steve Hein's Thread
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stevehein Offline
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Post: #91
RE: Steve Hein's Thread

some notes

modeling - adults

my beliefs

mu needs

respect - control

i didnt feel controlled by her. didnt feel resentful didnt feel pain from being controlled - didnt judge her as a hypoctrite

i felt bad cuz i did something which caused her some pain. something she didnt approve of. i do want her approval. but it isnt a primary need.

when i think about my unmet needs that cause me pain i dont ever think "i need more approval"

but i do say things like - i need more support, more understanding - i need to feel valued. cared about

i dont say i need to feel respected

i do sometimes say i need to feel more in control

chatting with pepole is diffrent than posting in forums.

i felt 'disarmed' byt gwedin last night

he didnt start out attacking me - judging me- trying to get pepole to hate me -- ie to undermine me

i feel respected by him 6 lets say

i feel respect for him --- the same. maybe even 8

i respect him cuz he seems to be pretty honest

i like honesty

he is not what would call emotionally literate 0r a skilled listener -- i would not want him working on a suicide prev phone line - but maybe in one to one he'd be ok

he left a decent to good message on d101's post about feeling down

i expected some abuse - but didnt see any

so i feel open to talk to him again - i see him more as a human - less of an enemy

rosenberg said get rid of our enemy images

pple here dont know rosenberg

but they will if they stay here cuz i will be talking about him

im ok with 95 percent of the people leaving the forum

i dont know if sr is.

she can tell me

i am ok with one by one temporarily banning pple and talking to them one on one in chatzy - it worked well last night

a couple things bothered me

first pple joined who were not invit4d

my idea was for it to be d g and me

then this mystery person starts judging me

then someone takes over d's name and starts psychoanalyzing/judging me

im very curious who that wws

llike most pple ho study psychology they were afraid to use their real name

or even their screen name

i have less and less respect for that so called profession all the time

they are worse than preachers we might say

more people believe in a university ditle saying psychologist than believe in god i think

i cant read the screen well so there are lots of typos

judge me on them and see what happens haha

so if soul agrees i will set a new level here - a new standard

a. it is not ok to judge/attack. label, criticize, invalidate other forum members.

debating is not encouraged.

understanding is

---

i dont believe in freedom of speech

i dont believe in "rights"

d uses the word. he is domesticated too much

he will have a chance to read my writing about it

which reminds me - who took over his name and how did that happen?

i believe in mutual respect --

i believe in emotional support

i believe in talking about feelings and needs - especially emotional needs

if pple dont want to talk about their emotional needs and feelings or mine - they wont last long here.

pple can call it an old boys club or whatever they want. that wont earn my respect

if they tell me how they feel and even better what their need is, that will earn my respect

if they show they care about about teens - that will earn my respect

so there u go -- psychoanalyze that -

*feels resentful

haha

read my page on resentment --- if uwant
from now on - at least this is what i want to say now - it can change cuz of my time demands - needs etc.....

from now on this is going to start to look like a new place.

the language will seem strange and it will be

it will seem like a foreign language - and it will be

but i believe - really believe - it is a healthier way of communicating

i go with my beliefs so yeah there u go


i go with my beliefs, my feelings, my needs.

that is the bottom line for now - we could say

--
but wait kids there is more

if u want to talk about ur beliefs. fine. lets compare them.

that doesnt mean attacking mine.

or someone else's - it means stating the clearly - answering questions diretly

which brings me to my time

i value ,my time. i value soulrisers time

if u dont value our time u are in the wrong place.

if u dont feel respect for us - u are in the wrong place

let's be real clear - real direct

--

your feelings sr?

yours tA?
yours d
yours ben?
yours dove?
yours sunflower?


these are - for now the people who i can think of off the top of y head that i care about and value the most here -- and night but she doesnt say much these days

hug to night Smile

i love night -- does anyone have a problem with that? haha
Yesterday 04:56 PM
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the Analogist Offline
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Posts: 817
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Post: #92
RE: Steve Hein's Thread

when Hans posted about the "basement" it wasnt long after i discovered the "underground", and not long after I discovered the underground there was that thread about banning SnowDove.

that Hans' post gave me a good chance to see how the logic of aristocracy prevails here was why I implied he was kind of ruining the forums.

aristocracy: layers of management by mostly autocratic chronies. quiet judging and non-inclusion. discussions about non-aristocrats to see who is worthy. i.e. HAVING TO WORRY ABOUT HOW I AM BEING JUDGED ON SCHOOL SURVIVAL.

my views on inclusion and exclusion do not sound like yours.

I enjoyed the like minded company here, but if my mind is too unlike I can just retreat back into my former obscurity.

stevehein, your making me feel like im hanging out with my friends in the basement, but now my judgy mother in law has shown up for some reason, and she's sitting there with us. now certain conversation topics are off limits and we cant be real anymore.

Purity is to Believe only that which deserves it.
Wisdom is to follow only the Opinion which makes the best use of evidence.
Excellence is to be mindful of all these things in Living.
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Yesterday 06:44 PM
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stevehein Offline
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Posts: 487
Joined: Dec 2007
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Post: #93
RE: Steve Hein's Thread

(Yesterday 06:44 PM)the Analogist Wrote:  when Hans posted about the "basement" it wasnt long after i discovered the "underground", and not long after I discovered the underground there was that thread about banning SnowDove.

that Hans' post gave me a good chance to see how the logic of aristocracy prevails here was why I implied he was kind of ruining the forums.

aristocracy: layers of management by mostly autocratic chronies. quiet judging and non-inclusion. discussions about non-aristocrats to see who is worthy. i.e. HAVING TO WORRY ABOUT HOW I AM BEING JUDGED ON SCHOOL SURVIVAL.

my views on inclusion and exclusion do not sound like yours.

I enjoyed the like minded company here, but if my mind is too unlike I can just retreat back into my former obscurity.

stevehein, your making me feel like im hanging out with my friends in the basement, but now my judgy mother in law has shown up for some reason, and she's sitting there with us. now certain conversation topics are off limits and we cant be real anymore.

ok

id be interested to see some examples of what you mean by topics off limits and cant be real anymore
Yesterday 08:20 PM
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stevehein Offline
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Posts: 487
Joined: Dec 2007
Thanks: 108
Given 314 thank(s) in 178 post(s)
Post: #94
RE: Steve Hein's Thread - banning Gwedin pt2

As you may know I briefly banned G because of an incorrect assumption I made about him deleting one of my posts.

But it wasn't only because of that. Just like suicide is never just for one specific reason. Both are like the straw that broke the camel's back.

I don't feel very understood for why there were already a lot straws on my back with regard to g.

So I propose that he, D101, Ben and also Dove and tA and Sunflower chat about this. Only us for now unless someone suggests someone else and gets my ok.

How do people feel about this idea?

btw I want to leave SR out of this unless she really wants to be involved. I would like to give her a much needed break from the drama here - and the stress and pain she feels when coming into the forum these days. Also I would like her to trust me to try to handle this myself. I have proposed something like this to her already and I am awaiting her reply.
Yesterday 10:14 PM
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stevehein Offline
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Posts: 487
Joined: Dec 2007
Thanks: 108
Given 314 thank(s) in 178 post(s)
Post: #95
RE: Steve Hein's Thread - SoulRiser

i just got a msg from sr.... it made my eyes water

i feel love for her...

hug to her
Yesterday 11:20 PM
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