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apple's Delusional Statements
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~!~<3 Offline
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Post: #1
apple's Delusional Statements

apple's probably has apple-flavored dreams, however apple does not usually remember them. apple does, however, receive frequent reports of things apple has said while mostly asleep. apple will share some of these here.

"Oh. She must loooove hot buns. ... She didn't have her hot bun this morning, that is why she's sad."
"Pie is how you test for conspirators. Only conspirators will eat cherry without pie."
"Flowers are tasty like rainbows are unicorns. You know it's true, you just won't admit that leprechauns are cannibals."

As an afterthought, apple should say that she does not remember saying any of this.

Actually thought of, typed, and posted by apple.
Probably edited by apple, too.

My Cheerios are always protected by umbrellas. Cute, personal umbrellas.
10-05-2010 12:58 AM
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Cilaos Offline
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Post: #2
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

I talk in my sleep and apparently you can have very brief chats with me.

I once threatened to sue someone trying to wake me up for making me swim too much, and another time I was talking about my urgent need to find a key to my bed.

"I need to find the key to the bed!"
"Beds don't have keys."
"I made one."

I AM A THIEF IN THE NIGHT I WILL SAVE AS MANY AS I CAN

I KEEP THEM IN MY BASEMENT

I TELL THEM I AM THEIR MOMMY NOW
10-05-2010 01:05 AM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #3
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

I speak very loudly when I sleep. It scares people.

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10-05-2010 01:07 AM
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Loxor Offline
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Post: #4
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

This thread will be hilarious.

I don't have crazy statements but a story, perhaps.


So, my brother is notorious for kicking people in his sleep. On trips I refuse to sleep next to him for this reason.
I give him the bed and sleep on the floor, then wake up having been kicked in the face. My brother kicked me from the bed in his sleep when I was at the foot of the bed. I am so very unlucky.

Anything that ever happened or will... one condition, it has to be amazing.

I gave her wings but she don't wanna fly no more.

I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
10-05-2010 01:27 AM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #5
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Try sleep-shouting war cries in foreign languages whilst your brother is walking past your room. At 1AM. Very fun.

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10-05-2010 01:28 AM
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MorikoMisa Offline
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Post: #6
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Try singing in your sleep.

*SPARKLING* *DOUCHEBUCKETS.*
10-05-2010 08:07 AM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #7
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcbazH6aE2g Try singing this in your sleep.

I'm so glad I know the origins of that song now.

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10-05-2010 08:13 AM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Post: #8
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

I'm apparently semi fully functional when someone tries to wake me up.

"Wake up!"
"Okay, in a minute."
*Half an hour later* "WHAT THE FUCK? GET UP!"
"Huh, what?"

I don't even remember shit from this period, so I never actually know if I was awake or not. Maybe my brain just doesn't store memory when I wake up, I dunno. Personally, I think that after getting woken up so much, I evolved to be able to carry on a conversation and still sleep. This only started last year.

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10-05-2010 08:15 AM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #9
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

You just don't realize falling asleep again.

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10-05-2010 08:20 AM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Post: #10
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

My theory is so much more badass though.

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10-05-2010 08:21 AM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #11
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Neo: *wakes up* *gasps* I know Sleep Fu...
Trinity: Sunnuva bitch *rubs bruise*.

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10-05-2010 08:23 AM
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Loxor Offline
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Post: #12
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

CrayolaColours Wrote:I'm apparently semi fully functional when someone tries to wake me up.

"Wake up!"
"Okay, in a minute."
*Half an hour later* "WHAT THE FUCK? GET UP!"
"Huh, what?"

I don't even remember shit from this period, so I never actually know if I was awake or not. Maybe my brain just doesn't store memory when I wake up, I dunno. Personally, I think that after getting woken up so much, I evolved to be able to carry on a conversation and still sleep. This only started last year.

LOL

I've done that.

I just think it's that I'm really still asleep and my subconscious is like oh hell no we getting some sleep.

Anything that ever happened or will... one condition, it has to be amazing.

I gave her wings but she don't wanna fly no more.

I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time
10-05-2010 08:37 AM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #13
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

I'm like 'Yup, go away. Right, *faps*'.

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10-05-2010 08:45 AM
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MorikoMisa Offline
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Post: #14
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

AWOL Wrote:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcbazH6aE2g Try singing this in your sleep.

I'm so glad I know the origins of that song now.
Maybe if my brain chooses to, it happens a lot less often nowadays, but I did it quite a bit as a kid. Eventually I think it turned into my singing when my little brother had a nightmare or it was storming out.

*SPARKLING* *DOUCHEBUCKETS.*
10-05-2010 09:38 AM
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~!~<3 Offline
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Post: #15
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

My sister kicks in her sleep. The really humorous situations occur when she ends up with one foot on my head and the other on my lower back and her head hanging off the bed. Those are the days when my back really hurts.

[We shared a bed for five years.]

Actually thought of, typed, and posted by apple.
Probably edited by apple, too.

My Cheerios are always protected by umbrellas. Cute, personal umbrellas.
10-07-2010 12:00 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #16
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Share a bed with her again and post pics.

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10-07-2010 12:01 PM
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~!~<3 Offline
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Post: #17
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

AWOL Wrote:Share a bed with her again and post pics.
Edit: FOUR YEARS AGO we shared a bed for five years.

Notice: You will never see my face. Thus, no.

Actually thought of, typed, and posted by apple.
Probably edited by apple, too.

My Cheerios are always protected by umbrellas. Cute, personal umbrellas.
10-07-2010 12:10 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #18
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Can't wait 'till I get your E-mail address. Mwuahahaha.

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10-07-2010 12:10 PM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Post: #19
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

He doesn't like you so he's trying to scare you off.

Stay just to piss him off.

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10-07-2010 12:27 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #20
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

No, I'm just bored. I am kind of annoyed that she has something against paedophiles, but I get that ever day, so whatever.

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10-07-2010 12:31 PM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Post: #21
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Well no shit. Like I said, when you're a sick fuck, people will treat you like a sick fuck.

Deal with it.

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10-07-2010 12:32 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #22
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

I disagree with your statement of my sickfuckery. I am not a sickfuck. I am not into entrails, or animals or any of that crap.

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10-07-2010 12:33 PM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Post: #23
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

No, but saying "Here, I have a fun game for you" "OKAY" Is consent in your eyes.

It makes you a huge sick fuck.

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10-07-2010 12:35 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #24
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

... No, that isn't consent in my eyes.

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10-07-2010 12:36 PM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Re: apple's Delusional Statements

You said something along those lines in my thread a while ago, if I remember.

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10-07-2010 12:37 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #26
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Most likely a joke... Like 80% of my posts...

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10-07-2010 12:41 PM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Post: #27
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Yes, well, that particular thread was NOT the joking type thread.

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10-07-2010 12:43 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #28
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Linkage pl0x. Or the name of the thread. Whatever.

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10-07-2010 12:43 PM
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CrayolaColours Offline
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Re: apple's Delusional Statements

The one where you said my brother raping my little sister was all right, because she said it was okay at the time, when she barely has any recollection of what sex is.

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10-07-2010 12:45 PM
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AWOL Offline
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Post: #30
Re: apple's Delusional Statements

Once again, linkage or name of thread.

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10-07-2010 12:47 PM
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