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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

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Hmm...I found this interesting question
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Trekkie_Aspie Offline
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Post: #1
Hmm...I found this interesting question

Well...it's more an interesting thought expriment than anything, I guess.


Do cyber-relationships count as cheating if the two people never meet in real life?

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stupid article
02-01-2013 10:22 AM
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Night Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Yes.

I'm a girl ffffeck
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02-01-2013 10:36 AM
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Trekkie_Aspie Offline
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Post: #3
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

(02-01-2013 10:36 AM)night.artist Wrote:  Yes.

Care to elaborate?

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02-01-2013 10:43 AM
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Night Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Well it cheating as a whole kind of depends from person to person.

But generally, carrying on with another relationship while you're with someone, and they don't know (or pretend they don't) that's typically considered cheating. Whether there has been physical contact or not.

But my ex thought that if I even was talking to another guy it was cheating. And because I'm bi, even if i was talking to another girl. Eventually I just stopped talking to anyone out of fear.

I'm a girl ffffeck
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02-01-2013 10:51 AM
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Trekkie_Aspie Offline
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Post: #5
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Oh...obviously, there's a difference of opinion...like nything else in life. Hmm...I see what you mean about the relationship contact. On the other hand....that's kinda like saying that porn is cheating...I mean, what else can you do over the internet?

If I seem rude to you, please call me on it gently.
One thing (among many others) school couldn't teach you.

((Google Asperger's Syndrome))

stupid article
02-01-2013 10:53 AM
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Night Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Porn is different. You're just watching it. You're not carrying out a relationship with them.

Besides, i think it's healthy to watch porn in a relationship. Gives you ideas >.>

I'm a girl ffffeck
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02-01-2013 10:56 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #7
Hmm...I found this interesting question

Define 'relationship' though? I mean, friendship is a type of relationship. And then there are about a million shades of gray between that and 'romance' (I hate that word)... so where do you draw the line?

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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02-01-2013 09:15 PM
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no Offline
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Post: #8
Hmm...I found this interesting question

There's no such thing as cheating if you don't accept there are rules from the outset. (like me)

Hello, traveler.

This is an ancient account I have not used in a long time. My views have changed much in the intervening months and years.

Nonetheless, I refuse to clean it up. Pretending that I've held my current views since the beginning of time is what we in the industry call a lie. Asking people to do so contributes to moralistic self-loathing. "See, those people have nothing damning! I do! I'm truly vile!"

Because you can never be a good person with a single blemish on the moral record, I thought that simply entertaining some thoughts made me irredeemable. Though I don't care for his writing style, William Faulkner presents a good counterexample. He went from being a typical Southern racist to supporting the civil rights movement. These days we'd yell at him for that, probably.

People are allowed to change their views.

Nevertheless, this period of my life has informed some of how I am today. In good ways and bad ways. To purge it would be to do a disservice to history. Perhaps it will not make anyone sympathetic, but it may help someone understand.

If, after reading all this, you still decide to use the post above as evidence that I am evil today, ask yourself if you have never disagreed with the moral code you now follow. In all likelihood you did, at some point. If some questions are verboten, and the answer is "how dare you ask that," don't expect your ideological opponents to ever change their minds.
02-01-2013 09:28 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #9
Hmm...I found this interesting question

Dishonesty and doing things behind each other's backs is always bad though, regardless of your definition of cheating.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
Help & Support - Get help with leaving school, unsupportive parents, and more.
Click here if school makes you depressed or suicidal

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"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide
"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer
EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder

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02-02-2013 02:37 AM
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Heil_Kaiba8921 Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

my answer is yes.

However, i am guilty of this form of cheating, but in my defence, i was a complete idiot back then.

The less you try to control things, the less you need to.

Boredom is the #1 enemy of learning. Therefore, school is the #1 enemy of learning.

"Bodies fucking fuck."~Night.Artist

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"free speech under the constitution only guarantees the government won't stop him saying it and does not guarantee his right to say things and have no consequences at all as a result. also i completely doubt that he is motivated solely by "i'm saying it because i can" and is probably motivated by a more shitheady motive like "i think it's funny to annoy people and Rustle Le Jimmies™ and is just hiding behind the first amendment to try to deflect any consequences or make you realize that being allowed to annoy people is a superior moral right. you can still disdain someone for doing things for dumbarse wankery purposes and you have evne more right to ban and insult them for it" ~Trar's friend about Potato.

Thanks for the diploma… can I have my childhood back?

I’d love to have a battle of wits with you… but I hate to fight the unarmed.
02-02-2013 04:08 AM
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no Offline
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Post: #11
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

(02-02-2013 02:37 AM)SoulRiser Wrote:  Dishonesty and doing things behind each other's backs is always bad though, regardless of your definition of cheating.

I wouldn't say this is cheating. A bad idea, yes -- but cheating implies strict rules that can't be bent or broken under any circumstances, and in some cases a single path that can't be diverted from.

Hello, traveler.

This is an ancient account I have not used in a long time. My views have changed much in the intervening months and years.

Nonetheless, I refuse to clean it up. Pretending that I've held my current views since the beginning of time is what we in the industry call a lie. Asking people to do so contributes to moralistic self-loathing. "See, those people have nothing damning! I do! I'm truly vile!"

Because you can never be a good person with a single blemish on the moral record, I thought that simply entertaining some thoughts made me irredeemable. Though I don't care for his writing style, William Faulkner presents a good counterexample. He went from being a typical Southern racist to supporting the civil rights movement. These days we'd yell at him for that, probably.

People are allowed to change their views.

Nevertheless, this period of my life has informed some of how I am today. In good ways and bad ways. To purge it would be to do a disservice to history. Perhaps it will not make anyone sympathetic, but it may help someone understand.

If, after reading all this, you still decide to use the post above as evidence that I am evil today, ask yourself if you have never disagreed with the moral code you now follow. In all likelihood you did, at some point. If some questions are verboten, and the answer is "how dare you ask that," don't expect your ideological opponents to ever change their minds.
02-02-2013 06:20 AM
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Trekkie_Aspie Offline
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Post: #12
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Another interesting thought experiment: Should parents be allowed to physically discipline their children in public?

If I seem rude to you, please call me on it gently.
One thing (among many others) school couldn't teach you.

((Google Asperger's Syndrome))

stupid article
02-02-2013 10:35 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #13
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Quote:I wouldn't say this is cheating. A bad idea, yes -- but cheating implies strict rules that can't be bent or broken under any circumstances, and in some cases a single path that can't be diverted from.
I wouldn't call it cheating either, but generally, if you can't be 100% honest with your partner about something, you have a problem. And this problem will only become bigger in time...

I don't like strict rules or single paths at all. If cheating implies these things, then... like I asked before, where do you actually draw the line? I think the line will be different depending on who you ask, because different people are different. The more insecure a person is, the sooner the line will be drawn... so that even looking at people of the opposite sex will be a problem, let alone hugging them. Whereas some other people won't mind any of that, and then some other people might not even mind going even further. And then you get some people that just don't mind anything at all whatsoever... (in which case, I suppose, cheating doesn't even exist for them).

Quote:Another interesting thought experiment: Should parents be allowed to physically discipline their children in public?
No, and not anywhere else either.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
Help & Support - Get help with leaving school, unsupportive parents, and more.
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02-02-2013 10:16 PM
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Trekkie_Aspie Offline
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Post: #14
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

But soul, what if the kid's going to run into the road?

night.artist, is it cheating if you watch porn then send a fan letter?

If I seem rude to you, please call me on it gently.
One thing (among many others) school couldn't teach you.

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stupid article
02-02-2013 10:19 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #15
Hmm...I found this interesting question

How does hitting a kid prevent them from running in the road? Grabbing them sounds more useful in that case... that way at least you're protecting them from the car, and not giving them a reason to want to run away from you...

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
Help & Support - Get help with leaving school, unsupportive parents, and more.
Click here if school makes you depressed or suicidal

Support School Survival on Patreon or Donate Bitcoin Here: 1Q5WCcxWjayniaL92b8GfXBiGdfjmnUNa2
"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide
"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer
EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder

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02-03-2013 05:13 AM
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Trekkie_Aspie Offline
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Post: #16
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Soul, I don't know either. I'm playing devil's adovacate ... it's one of the reasons people give for spanking.

So.....does grabbing them not count as physically disciplining them in public, then?

If I seem rude to you, please call me on it gently.
One thing (among many others) school couldn't teach you.

((Google Asperger's Syndrome))

stupid article
02-03-2013 05:41 AM
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Heil_Kaiba8921 Offline
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Post: #17
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

for the hitting kids i npublic thing...

My seminary teacher has cerebral palsy and has to use crutches to get around, well one day one of his kids was running into the street and a car was coming...since he couldn't catch up with him, he just tripped him using his crutch.

What is your moral standpoint on this everybody?

The less you try to control things, the less you need to.

Boredom is the #1 enemy of learning. Therefore, school is the #1 enemy of learning.

"Bodies fucking fuck."~Night.Artist

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"free speech under the constitution only guarantees the government won't stop him saying it and does not guarantee his right to say things and have no consequences at all as a result. also i completely doubt that he is motivated solely by "i'm saying it because i can" and is probably motivated by a more shitheady motive like "i think it's funny to annoy people and Rustle Le Jimmies™ and is just hiding behind the first amendment to try to deflect any consequences or make you realize that being allowed to annoy people is a superior moral right. you can still disdain someone for doing things for dumbarse wankery purposes and you have evne more right to ban and insult them for it" ~Trar's friend about Potato.

Thanks for the diploma… can I have my childhood back?

I’d love to have a battle of wits with you… but I hate to fight the unarmed.
02-03-2013 11:00 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #18
RE: Hmm...I found this interesting question

Quote:So.....does grabbing them not count as physically disciplining them in public, then?
If you're grabbing them in order to get them out of direct harm's way, then no, then it's just being responsible and caring and it'll totally make sense to them as soon as they realize what would have hit them if you had not done that...

On the other hand, if they were just running generally towards a road and there is no car anywhere in sight, then it's just being overly paranoid for no damn reason. They can obviously see there's no car, so there's no reason to freak out for running towards the road. They might not even have been planning to go in the road at all.

Quote:My seminary teacher has cerebral palsy and has to use crutches to get around, well one day one of his kids was running into the street and a car was coming...since he couldn't catch up with him, he just tripped him using his crutch.
If the kid was actually in danger and tripping was the only feasible way he could stop the kid from getting hit by the car, sure, fine, that was a good idea then. But I kinda get the feeling that wasn't the case...? How sure was he the kid was really planning on going into the road, and didn't see the car?

Also, does your teacher have the ability to shout? That would have made more sense if it wasn't a case of immediate danger.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
Help & Support - Get help with leaving school, unsupportive parents, and more.
Click here if school makes you depressed or suicidal

Support School Survival on Patreon or Donate Bitcoin Here: 1Q5WCcxWjayniaL92b8GfXBiGdfjmnUNa2
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"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer
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02-05-2013 09:05 AM
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