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Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!
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Mælstrom Offline
GIVE ME LEEBERTY, OR GIVE ME DEATH

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Post: #1
Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

Close your eyes and imagine that one guy/gal you went to school with who tried their hardest to live the "thug lyfe 4evah" . Chav, wigger and poser are derogatory names that come to mind, but they all come back to one focal point: thel white person who tries to act "black".

Like a scene from the Twilight Zone, this offbeat menace has spread across Europe and North America like a plague, moving into every settlement and township at a steady pace. What I'm about to present here is a case worth mentioning: the odd case of Mr. Swift.


This aspiring young Italian-Belarussian rapper lives two streets away from me, in the confines of a large McMansion on a street so suburban that it's comparable to a Nuketown of carbon-copy housing and people. He goes to school with me, rides my bus, and abuses his girlfriend all while getting cars for his birthday, and other pricey junk. Good rappers tend to come from the lower class, relying on the hardships and adversities they've had to overcome as a creative tool while writing and performing their music. What you see here is the exact opposite: monotone singing, repetitive and uninspired beats, and unintelligible lyrics are all this spoiled youth has to offer, if it means anything.

I cried tears of laughter and joy after witnessing this archetype of sheer stupidity, and I hope you will to. Enjoy the talents of Mr. Swift!



Watch on YouTube

If you're reading this, I killed myself.
(This post was last modified: 04-28-2012 01:27 PM by Mælstrom.)
04-28-2012 01:26 PM
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alexander144 Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

Wow, that is horrendously awful. I am sure his rap career will go nowhere.
04-28-2012 01:47 PM
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Vivi Offline
Living Dead Girl

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Post: #3
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

what even is this
40 seconds in and my ear is bleeding and my brain is decomposing while everything in my body is screaming for mercy
--
looked at his other videos and i am seriously dead now my brain has melted into slush
not really but i have a massive headache and my head feels hot
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IHIfHXvJs8&feature=plcp
(posted link because the youtube tag hates me today apparently)

[Image: ACaniFINAL.gif]
(This post was last modified: 04-28-2012 04:36 PM by Vivi.)
04-28-2012 04:29 PM
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Sharpie Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

Is he actually serious?

The camera work wasn't that great, he kept smiling like a retard, and his friends he had following him at the end didn't know what the fuck they were doing.

Not to mention that was just downright horrible.
(This post was last modified: 04-28-2012 04:50 PM by Sharpie.)
04-28-2012 04:49 PM
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aaaaaaasd Offline
Grorious Moddu

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Post: #5
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

alas I don't think the badmans at my school got into rapping yet

the only person who ever went to my school to go on to make terrible music was some faggot who now markets himself as the british justin beiber
04-28-2012 09:39 PM
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.Manicrose. Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

(04-28-2012 01:47 PM)alexander144 Wrote:  Wow, that is horrendously awful. I am sure his rap career will be hugely successful.
Adjusted for the 21st century "music" scene

Go to work. Send your kids to school. Follow fashion. Act normal. Walk on the pavement. Watch TV. Save for your old age. Obey the law. Repeat after me: "I am free."

Hidden stuff:
04-28-2012 10:54 PM
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UnschoolShqiponjë Offline
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Post: #7
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

He definitely fits in today's top 40. As sad as that is.

Live until you die
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04-29-2012 02:55 AM
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Luizao876 Offline
Everyone's favorite Huezillian

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Post: #8
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

I liked somewhat the beat and everything. I can listen to it, but his stupid voice is.... oh god. These kind of people are the ones that are popular.
04-29-2012 03:11 AM
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Mælstrom Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

Yeah, they just had a huge pool party at his house where they blared house music and gangsta rap until 5 in the morning. A kid died there after walking into the nearby forest and getting mutilated by a pack of coyotes.

If you're reading this, I killed myself.
04-29-2012 03:17 AM
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UltraRobot Offline
I need you to escape.

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Post: #10
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

What the almighty fuck did I just watch?

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"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. The mediocre mind is incapable of understanding the man who refuses to bow blindly to conventional prejudices and chooses instead to express his opinions courageously and honestly." - Albert Einstein

"Within a few years a simple and inexpensive device, readily carried about, will enable one to receive on land or sea the principal news, to hear a speech, a lecture, a song or play of a musical instrument, conveyed from any other region of the globe." - Nikola Tesla
04-29-2012 01:04 PM
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Mælstrom Offline
GIVE ME LEEBERTY, OR GIVE ME DEATH

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Post: #11
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

(04-29-2012 01:04 PM)UltraRobot Wrote:  What the almighty fuck did I just watch?

You just watched the very video that will send an armada of aliens to destroy human civilization because of their anger towards it after their scientists find it. Vincent Fatore will be known as the boy who doomed us all.

If you're reading this, I killed myself.
04-29-2012 01:09 PM
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Sharpie Offline
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Post: #12
RE: Mr. Swift, a neighbourhood menace that must be stopped!

(04-29-2012 01:09 PM)Reckoner Wrote:  
(04-29-2012 01:04 PM)UltraRobot Wrote:  What the almighty fuck did I just watch?

You just watched the very video that will send an armada of aliens to destroy human civilization because of their anger towards it after their scientists find it. Vincent Fatore will be known as the boy who doomed us all.

The aliens could handle humanity's various other fuck ups and general stupidity, but this was too far.
04-29-2012 05:25 PM
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