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August 2001 - June 2017

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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

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Poll: Does everyone have hope?
Yes.
No.
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Hope
Author Message
schoolsux Offline
fuck this school bullshit

Posts: 627
Joined: Feb 2015
Thanks: 208
Given 102 thank(s) in 75 post(s)
Post: #11
RE: Hope

(09-18-2015 11:01 PM)Rule_BreakerXVIII Wrote:  Tricky question.

It is so damn hard to hope when you're depressed, sad or just feeling weak. But then again, the causes of my depression were mostly hormones(middle school) and external circumstances(being surrounded by assholes). Even then I simply got tired of feeling empty, and tried to invent a religion.

I think people misunderstand hope and optimism as being constantly preppy or 'at peace' in a "God will take care of this" way. Sometimes hope can be knowing that if you push enough, things will work out your way...sooner or later. Or maybe it's a feeling that a certain "something" you really need is out there somewhere, and that you'll find it if you try/look hard enough. I don't think I have ever been totally hopeless.

I have little at this point. I've been battling depression (thank you mom (for making me move with my dad), Mr. Reinke (teacher who ruins every day of mine), middle school crush (rejecting me) and self-deflating personality) since before I came to SS (though I have had good days and weeks... and some where I considered suicide)

schoolsux's countdown until school ends:

177 days until i get out of freshman year (aka hell)
1280 days until I get out of prison (aka school)

(as of november 28, 2016)

also Fu school

Hidden stuff:

schoolsux's "k" Count: 60
09-19-2015 07:35 AM
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Messages In This Thread
Hope - Happy Camper - 10-26-2006, 01:42 PM
Hope - Money morkel - 07-02-2015, 03:47 PM
Hope - Phynex - 07-27-2015, 05:50 AM
Hope - Rule_BreakerXVIII - 09-18-2015, 11:01 PM
RE: Hope - schoolsux - 09-19-2015 07:35 AM
Hope - sfslol - 12-09-2015, 06:21 PM
Hope - schoolsux - 12-13-2015, 12:09 AM
[] - Freak - 10-26-2006, 03:56 PM
[] - Demonic Pyro - 10-26-2006, 10:47 PM
[] - Doc Johnson - 10-27-2006, 01:18 AM
[] - SoulRiser - 10-27-2006, 05:55 AM
[] - Dark Soul X - 10-27-2006, 06:01 AM
[] - Guest - 11-01-2006, 11:50 AM

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