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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

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Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

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Selfishness
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Hayley44 Offline
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Post: #1
Selfishness

Is there anything that people do that isn't motivated in some way by the desire for self-glorification? Even when people do good deeds for others, they do it because it gives them some sense of self satisfaction or joy, or at least the feeling that they did the right thing. It makes everything in life seem so vain, how everything that people do is just a way to serve themselves.
04-22-2008 09:21 AM
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Gorebell Offline
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Post: #2
Re: Selfishness

Indeed.
04-22-2008 10:24 AM
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Alucard483 Offline
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Post: #3
Re: Selfishness

Haley brings up an EXTREAMLY interesting thought. She even touched upon the idea that by ding good things it is in the intrest of making yourself feel good. Doing somthing because you have to also fails because you are doing it becasue if you dont people will get on your case, so you do it to kep people from bitching about shit. This is a HARD topic. I shall sleep on this tonight. My hat is off to such a thought inspiring topic.

Whilst some work diligently there are those who ask why. I am one of them
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04-22-2008 10:31 AM
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Suicidal-kun Offline
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Post: #4
Re: Selfishness

Sad, but true, you know? That's how the world is, everybody's out for themselves.
04-22-2008 10:32 AM
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rAnx Offline
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Post: #5
Re: Selfishness

I don't think that the idea of greed necessarily extends towards people who would otherwise be considered beneficiaries. Think about the kinds of people that we normally associate with greed, then compare them with wealthy people who otherwise lack the connotation. Warren Buffet, though insanely rich, is seen by many as generous for his donations. Scrooge, though a fictional character, lies on the opposite end. Though rich as well, he never gives a cent to charity, refuses to give his employees Christmas off, and pays them a disparagingly small amount of money for their services, thus synonymizing his own name with greed. I think the act of greed isn't merely one's self service, but said self service when it comes as a detriment to others.

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04-22-2008 10:52 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #6
Re: Selfishness

If doing the right thing felt terrible and guaranteed you a life of misery, would you still do it?

(I'm still thinking about that one)

It's actually hard to imagine how doing the right thing could possibly NOT feel good. But do you really do it because it feels good, or because it's the right thing to do, and the good feeling is just a convenient side effect? I guess that goes back to my first question. Which I'm still thinking about.

(Loop post... lol)

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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04-22-2008 11:37 AM
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HeartofShadows Offline
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Post: #7
Re: Selfishness

I fully agree.

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04-22-2008 11:44 AM
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thoughtmaker Offline
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Post: #8
Re: Selfishness

people do the 'right' thing, because even if it may make them feel bad, they would feel worse if they did the 'wrong' thing.
04-22-2008 01:51 PM
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Eidolon Away
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Post: #9
Re: Selfishness

I read an article once about this once.

Basically it said that selfishness is inescapable, but that there are different kinds of selfishness. An act of kindness, while selfish, is still an act of kindness. You're helping more people than just yourself. Stealing for personal gain is selfish, but you're only helping yourself in this case, which makes it bad.

I don't know if I made that readable enough... Do I make sense?
04-22-2008 09:41 PM
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Darthmat Offline
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Post: #10
Re: Selfishness

It made sense.

And sometimes I think this isn't the case. Sometimes, I am in the same situation as before, and the 'right thing to do' becomes tedious, and I hate doing it. So I don't think it's ALL cases, just most.

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04-22-2008 09:44 PM
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fragile-esteem Offline
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Post: #11
Re: Selfishness

[quote="SoulRiser"]

It's actually hard to imagine how doing the right thing could possibly NOT feel good. quote] people live it everyday, Mugabes apposers are doing the right thing as it may feel good when they stand up but does it still feel good when they are being persecuted?

Not all good acts are selfish. The man at Glasgow airport didn't think oh I'll feel good ifs I knock that man unconcious he thought I should stop that man he is going to hurt people.

And if doing the wrong thing can feel good to some people then doing the right thing can sometimes feel bad like if someone (little kids example) bullies you and picks on you so you don';t invite them to your house that is the right thing in a sense but you might still feel bad.

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COMMUNISM is when you have two cows, the governement takes both and gives you the milk
SOCIALISM is when you have two cows and give one to your neighbour.
NEW DEALISM (is when things go wrong) is when you have two cows, the government takes both, shoots one and milks the other but then throws the milk away.
CAPITALISM is when you have two cows and then sell one to buy a bull.
FACISM is when you have two cows, the government takes both and sells you the milk.
NAZISM is when you have two cows, the government takes both and shoots you.

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04-23-2008 05:22 AM
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Hayley44 Offline
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Post: #12
Re: Selfishness

Eidolon Wrote:I read an article once about this once.

Basically it said that selfishness is inescapable, but that there are different kinds of selfishness. An act of kindness, while selfish, is still an act of kindness. You're helping more people than just yourself. Stealing for personal gain is selfish, but you're only helping yourself in this case, which makes it bad.

I don't know if I made that readable enough... Do I make sense?

I really like your take on this. I guess people need some sort of motivation to help each other out, and even if it's based off selfishness, it can't be entirely selfish if it's helping someone else out in the process.
04-23-2008 06:00 AM
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Bob Dole Offline
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Post: #13
Re: Selfishness

Yeah, the original Cynics believed people never did anything for any reason unless it was for them in some way. I dunno about that, really. Giving up your life to save some random person on the street sounds pretty selfless. Though it might also be stupidity.

K
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04-23-2008 08:41 AM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #14
Re: Selfishness

Yeah, how does it feel good to give up your life for someone else? There's no guarantee you'll even feel anything at all when you're dead. Maybe it feels good in the split second before you die, though. But is a split second of nice feeling worth dying for? I think there must be more to it when people do things like that.

Even if doing something feels good afterwards, that still doesn't mean it's the reason you do it.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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04-24-2008 01:22 AM
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Ahab Offline
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Post: #15
Re: Selfishness

Think illnesses for this one. My mom is something of a down syndrome activist because my sister has down syndrome. Down syndrome kids did exist before my sister was born, it's just my Mom has a selfish desire to feel like she has some sense of value by going to meetings, activism, etc. It's all really materialism, but by the same count it is OK because we do, with all the machines flaws, have some benefit from the concept of private charity as a means to fufill materialist desires. The fact most people look to their bottom line goal as opposed to the road towards that goal allow it to be a continuous cycle. Feel guilty? Donate again.

"If you think you know what the hell is going on, you're probably full of shit." - Robert Anton Wilson
04-24-2008 01:43 AM
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Stadium Offline
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Post: #16
RE: Selfishness

However unfortunate it is, it's human nature. We can't change the way we all are inside, no matter how hard we try.
11-15-2011 05:39 AM
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gore goroth Offline
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Post: #17
RE: Selfishness

Quote:Is there anything that people do that isn't motivated in some way by the desire for self-glorification?



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11-15-2011 06:59 AM
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jnkbortka Offline
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Post: #18
RE: Selfishness

you are wired to be selfish. for instance, you eat because it gives off dopamine in the brain, which makes us happy. our survival is based on what makes us happy. people that are generous give money because they get a warm fuzzy feeling from it. so stop trying to say selfishness is a bad thing, if you think about it, it's that selfishness that makes that rich guy give his money. :mindfuck:
11-20-2011 08:45 AM
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SH☮TGUNHEⒶRT Offline
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Post: #19
RE: Selfishness

"Everybody has a sense of self-interest, and the capability to act in a selfish way at other people’s expense. But everyone also has a sense of the needs of those around them, and we are all capable of generous and selfless actions. Human survival depends on generosity."- Peter Gelderloos

I'm sorry It's impossible to function reasonable completely off of selfishness, because you need everyone else to get those needs met.

Live is about pursuing your interests and staying true to yourself, but seriously if you think you can live simply in the motives to serve yourself then you are tripping. You're always going to have to have someone else helping you fulfill those needs. It's the basics of human survival.

To be an anarchist, is to suffer greatly. To be a black woman is to suffer secretly. To be the earth, is to suffer silently.

I wish no harm on anyone, but those whose harmful ways will not stop without the same harm.

It's time we kill this cancerous system, before it kills us and everything left of gaia. Rise from our immaturity and take back our autonomy!

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11-20-2011 08:54 AM
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Robert Offline
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Post: #20
RE: Selfishness

We all need to be some selfish because even if we are helping others we are doing that for heaven form God.We need heaven and we don't want hell
that's the point.
12-14-2011 02:47 PM
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thewake Offline
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Post: #21
Selfishness



Watch on YouTube

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01-13-2013 10:31 AM
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Ky Offline
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Post: #22
Selfishness

NEWFAFS, ENOUGH BUMPI...

*looks up*

Oh, it's just Wes. Carry on.

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01-13-2013 10:37 AM
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thewake Offline
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Post: #23
Selfishness

DoA, compared to me you're the newfaf.

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01-13-2013 10:39 AM
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Ky Offline
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Post: #24
Selfishness

Indeed, but when I saw the post dates on this thread I thought someone who just recently joined was responsible.

Public Service Announcement: First world problems are still problems.
01-13-2013 10:52 AM
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тωιѕтє∂ Offline
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Post: #25
RE: Selfishness

(04-22-2008 09:21 AM)Hayley44 Wrote:  Is there anything that people do that isn't motivated in some way by the desire for self-glorification? Even when people do good deeds for others, they do it because it gives them some sense of self satisfaction or joy, or at least the feeling that they did the right thing. It makes everything in life seem so vain, how everything that people do is just a way to serve themselves.

There are many people in the world that I would die for, but there's always the people in the world where I would pay to see them tortured and killed.
-Me

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01-13-2013 12:48 PM
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brainiac3397 Offline
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Post: #26
Selfishness

"Selfishness makes the world go round, but the selfish sometimes forget to turn the wheel."

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(06-14-2013 08:02 AM)Potato Wrote:  watch the fuq out, we've got an "intellectual" over here.

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02-12-2013 01:19 PM
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Money morkel Offline
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Post: #27
Selfishness

Concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others.
07-02-2015 03:28 PM
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Cianna200 Offline
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Post: #28
RE: Selfishness

Although you can feel good by putting people before you, it is all about for the sake of loving true goodness and rejecting evil, you can sacrifice even if it is painful, even if the putting of them before you may leave you weak, being selfless for the sake of selflessness, and not for pleasure, is true virtue. There is a difference between pleasure and happiness. Pleasure is primarily selfish, it seeks good feelings from using people, things etc. Happiness is more about internal goodness. Happiness is more of an attitude or condition, while pleasure is a short-lived emotion. Pleasure is about the senses, happiness is about the heart/soul. However, since we are imperfect and incomplete beings, we can't transcend our selfishness completely.
Though remember, selfishness should not be confused with self love.
(This post was last modified: 07-02-2015 05:33 PM by Cianna200.)
07-02-2015 05:14 PM
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thewake Offline
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Post: #29
RE: Selfishness

selflessness is evil and a vice

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07-03-2015 01:26 AM
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Cianna200 Offline
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Post: #30
RE: Selfishness

Sounds like you prefer the world's destruction, which is evil.
07-03-2015 03:18 AM
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