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Emos and Computer Assembly
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aaaaaaasd Offline
Grorious Moddu

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Post: #1
Emos and Computer Assembly

Anyone who has any idea of how you put a computer together will cringe at this
Quote:It all began earlier this evening, at an unspecified American electronics retailer…

A teenage gentleman who appeared to identify with the emo culture came to the technician desk as he was having computer problems. He had bought and “installed” a nice Asrock motherboard with an Intel CPU, a low end coolermaster CPU cooler and an XFX 9800 GT (It was brand new, I have no idea where he bought that). All total it was easily a few hundred dollars of merchandise. The case was also a screaming ricer, full plastic construction with lights everywhere. He complained that he could not get the computer to start.

Upon taking it to the back bench, the first order of business was to plug it in. Placing the cord into the PSU, it simply slid backwards into the case. Not that bad of a mistake, he had simply forgotten to actually screw the PSU into the case, it was sitting unsecured. We then realized that the voltage had been set for European 240v, not the American 120v. Luckily for him it meant that the computer simply wouldn’t start up, had this been done the other way around the PSU would have exploded. However, even after fixing the voltage the computer still wouldn’t turn on. We opened it up and our jaws dropped.

Problem number one, the motherboard had been installed without the standoff screws. The motherboard was directly fastened to the case. This alone was enough to murder the computer because, surprise!, the case conducts electricity and the motherboard was directly touching it! Because of this, he had actually snapped a few pieces off of the video cards bracket in order for it to poke out the back of the case correctly. This is problem 1/3 and he’s already fried the motherboard and hacked parts off the video card.

Problem number two, there was a mysterious floating 2.5 inch hard drive in the 3.5 inch hard drive bay. No 3.5-2.5 adapter, it was just floating there. Upon further inspection, we realized that since the holes did not line up, the guy drilled a hole in the fucking hard drive to get it to fit in the 3.5 inch bay. WHY? WHYYYYY? It wasn’t even an SSD either (thank God) but a laptop hard drive, God knows why it was even in there.

Problem number three, the CPU release lock lever was pointing off in some random direction. The entire mechanism had been snapped off. Looking at the CPU, there was some weird brown shit all over the CPU. After asking him, we found it was super glue. In case you didn’t understand that, HE USED SUPER GLUE TO CONNECT HIS CPU TO THE HEATSINK. Not only that, but he also put super glue directly on the pins to get it to stay inside of the socket since he broke the locking lever. SUPER GLUE. ON BOTH SIDES. OF THE CPU.

There were numerous other problems to his computer as well, the cheap as hell looking power supply, a dented capacitor on the motherboard from what appeared to be a dropped screwdriver, and uncountable numbers of other fuckups. It was blatantly obvious that this guy had NO idea about how a computer works, and had the sheer arrogance to try and build a computer without even trying to read the fucking manual. Sheer stupidity more like it.

And I guess that ends the story. The death toll: he fried the motherboard, ruined the CPU, and fucking drilled a hole in the hard drive. Remember Facepunch, if you are going to build a computer, read the fucking manual, or just ask the H&S section.

TL;DR: Super Glue on the CPU, no motherboard stand offs, and a hole drilled in the hard drive.
01-18-2011 08:20 AM
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Elfy Offline
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Post: #2
Re: Emos and Computer Assembly

HA HA HA OH WOW

...

THOSE POOR COMPUTER PARTS

I'm willing to bet that the parts weren't even compatible with eatchother in the first place.

RIP SCHOOL-SURVIVAL 04/07/2019
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01-18-2011 08:25 AM
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aaaaaaasd Offline
Grorious Moddu

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Post: #3
Re: Emos and Computer Assembly

I know right, it doesn't even mention RAM so I assume he didn't buy any
01-18-2011 08:47 AM
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Elfy Offline
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Post: #4
Re: Emos and Computer Assembly

And you can't really build anything half decent with a few hundred dollars. I'd be spending that much on the cpu and gpu alone.

RIP SCHOOL-SURVIVAL 04/07/2019
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01-18-2011 09:12 AM
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Absnt Offline
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Post: #5
Re: Emos and Computer Assembly

Elfy Wrote:And you can't really build anything half decent with a few hundred dollars. I'd be spending that much on the cpu and gpu alone.

This.

And I didn't cringe, I was laughing my ass off. Laugh

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01-18-2011 05:54 PM
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