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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.
I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.
I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.
I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.
I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.
Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.
Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.
-SoulRiser
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Most embarrasing moments at school.
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Happy Camper
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I remember I was named fanny pack in fourth grade. Because the medication I was on made me gain a lot of weight and so while people hate me for being too skinny now (even though I eat like a hog) I was the chubby kid in elementary school. They'd grab my tummy and keep screaming fanny pack! Fanny pack! Then they also called me an alien or that girl from "planet weird". And they called me lots of other names. You can't really bully girls physically because people get on your ass for it. It all has to be verbal.
Then I switched medications so instead of being fat and pathetic I was really angry. Some kids were bullying my sister and I chased them around the playground and hit them with a stick and told them that if they ever messed with my sister or her neighbor again I would kick their ass. It was really ridiculous because they were scared of me throughout middle-school and even when I was in high-school. But then I was on mood stabalizers, I would never hurt anybody.
Um...oh. There was sort of the whole Star Wars thing.
My actual name is Amelia but I go by Lia a lot whenever I'm not going by Rain. So Kyle K, Kyle E, and Martin all got together and wanted to play Star Wars at recess. But they had a bit of a problem because they needed to capture a Princess Leia. Well with their dimwitted little heads put together they came to the conclusion that since my nickname resembled hers, they had to take me captive. It didn't involve a lot of bullying but I was dragged around a lot and I kept trying to get away so that involved chasing me down and pinning me to the ground. I was more sick of them sticking me in this wooden ship contraption and blocking off all the entrances and exits so I was trapped in there. That wasn't very much fun.
The bullying sort of stopped after my Dad died in sixth grade. Because nobody felt like they could get away with picking on someone who had actually had a somewhat traumatic experience involving her family. Even if I was the only single-parent kid in the school after that.
Kyle E also sent me into tears when I was in eigth grade because he wished me a happy birthday. Someone told him to shut up and not talk to me because my dog had died the day before. So he went ahead and yelled across the science room, "Holy Crap! Your dog died?" He probably didn't mean to make me cry but I was triggered by just about everything that day.
Let's do the time warp again!
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| 12-03-2006 03:22 PM |
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habla
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i'm realy sorry your dad, and dog died. my friend died like a month ago...i'm still getting over her.
I don't suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute of it.
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| 12-03-2006 03:25 PM |
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And school teaches socialization... how?
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| 12-03-2006 03:36 PM |
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xXThe Damnation ProjectXx
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my friend B.Q. died a a while ago 
his spirits still here i can feel him
and if its not him then i wonder who it is
R.I.P. B.Q.
Freya Stark - “There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do.”
![[Image: untitled-4.jpg]](http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a195/kyles-stuff111/untitled-4.jpg)
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| 12-03-2006 03:38 PM |
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Cosbydaf
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Kirby Wrote:And school teaches socialization... how?
From what I've experienced, it works by isolating everyone who the other kids don't like, and making them miserable.
I hate school.
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| 12-03-2006 03:38 PM |
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habla
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xXThe Damnation ProjectXx Wrote:my friend B.Q. died a a while ago
his spirits still here i can feel him
and if its not him then i wonder who it is
R.I.P. B.Q.
death sucks, i was in 7th grade too at the tiem. i just couldnt believe it.
I don't suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute of it.
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| 12-04-2006 03:21 AM |
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Most embarrasing moments at school.
