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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

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Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

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!!!!!!
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random_name Offline
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Post: #1
!!!!!!

now im very. very. annoyed.

i got picked up by my mother from dads house today, and she was in one of her ad moods. we had to go to the shops, and were told what we were having for tea, pork. my brother began the argument that he 'doesnt like that any more', putting mum in an even worse mood. as soon as she was out of earshot i asked him why he was being so difficult, when mum was plainly upset. he did something unexcpected then - he broke down crying.

i know i rant about my brother a lot, and he can be a pain in the neck sometimes. but he is my brother. and when he is upset the only thing i can do is try to help. i love him dearly. i want to kill him sometimes, but i would kill for him every day.

i asked him what was wrong, why he was crying. his answer, school. my brother is only eight, and he never seemed to have a problem with school, he always loved going. but he told me a story. he told me about one boy who bullies him at school, how he cant tell his teachers, and how much it really hurts him. this really hurt to see. my eight year old brother, in tears because of some t**t at school. he was always bright, bouncy, fun loving and full of life. now, in the car, confessing to me what he wouldnt to anyone else, he was more like a shadow. i really wanted to kill this little b*****d who had upset him so much, but that would hve been stupid. another of my brothers freinds had given the chld our adress, and was now threatening to come round to our house, to beat him up. it was at this point i told him if he ever threatened to get his brother on him again, i would go and sort him out - brother or no brother.

he has my problem - he feels trapped. he feels like oif he tells school it will get worse. he wont tell mum because she is upset, he wouldnt tell ur grandparents because we all dislike them. and he wouldnt tell dad, because the last time he did he was toild to go fend for himself. so that leaves me. im the only one he can confess this to. he knows i have been bullied, and am still teased. he knows i hate school. he knows i dont beleive in god (another trait we share). so he comes to me for advicenow. it feels good to be able to help, but i just want to kill this lad who has upset him so much.

does anyone have any advice on what i can say to him, or anything i can pass on to him. and no, dont tell me to make him read steve pavlina's book =]

Hidden stuff:
"A 'no' uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a 'yes' merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble." - Mahatma Gandhi

"The irrationality of a thing is no argument against its existence, rather a condition of it."

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
-Ben Franklin

"when I was a kid I used to pray for a bicycle. then I realized that god doesn't work that way. so I stole one and prayed for forgiveness."
"I would rather die for something I believe in than live for anything else."
"What is the task of higher education? To make a man into a machine. What are the means employed? He is taught how to suffer being bored." – F W Nietzsche
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11-25-2008 02:34 AM
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Puchiko Offline
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Post: #2
Re: !!!!!!

I think the most important thing is to be there for him. You already are, so do continue in the same manner. Provide a listening and understanding ear. Hug him if you think it'll help.

The above is merely treating the symptoms, but even that is much better than nothing. To address the root cause of the problem is difficult. Reporting bullying to higher powers (teachers or parents), though frequently advised, has often backfired. It is something to consider, but keep in mind the potential consequences (pissing the bully off and being known as a tattler).

It would be helpful to know how exactly the bullying takes place.
Physical? Can he learn how to defend himself (martial arts classes?) or run quickly enough to escape?
Emotional is just as harmful, and the solution is no easier. Finding a few friends can make your brother feel socially accepted, and he is less likely to be picked if he's surrounded by a few other boys. Try to explain to him that in instances of name calling, walking away is almost always the best solution.

Leaving is another solution, though impossible for most. Homeschooling is definitely a great choice, but it doesn't sound like it's an option (but don't hesitate if it is). If changing schools is possible, it might be a good thing to do when all else fails. A fresh start, away from the bully could prove beneficial.

I've tried to provide some advice above, but truth is-you're in a difficult situation that's going to be difficult to deal with. I wish both of you good luck when it comes to dealing with problems.

Don't take life so seriously, it isn't permanent.
11-25-2008 05:12 AM
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random_name Offline
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Post: #3
Re: !!!!!!

thanks. Smile

Hidden stuff:
"A 'no' uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a 'yes' merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble." - Mahatma Gandhi

"The irrationality of a thing is no argument against its existence, rather a condition of it."

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
-Ben Franklin

"when I was a kid I used to pray for a bicycle. then I realized that god doesn't work that way. so I stole one and prayed for forgiveness."
"I would rather die for something I believe in than live for anything else."
"What is the task of higher education? To make a man into a machine. What are the means employed? He is taught how to suffer being bored." – F W Nietzsche
[Image: s-event.png]
11-25-2008 05:18 AM
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John Tuttle Offline
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Post: #4
Re: !!!!!!

random_name Wrote:thanks. Smile
Hug

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11-25-2008 01:24 PM
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Hanny Offline
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Post: #5
Re: !!!!!!

Who'd want to bully your brother? He's the sweetest little kid I ever saw. Well, nearly. But definitely WAY too sweet to be treated like that.

My own bruv had this problem in primary; and the school took a MASSIVE risk and assigned the bully to be my brother's Buddy (Someone who has been asked to specifically look after someone else and show them around, help them). They are still in touch, and we got some insight into the real problem; The bully came from a dysfunctional/abusive family, and struggled with everyday friendship/relationships. He used to come round to our house and was apparently a nice lad. Just an interesting snippet.

Anyway, if this is physical abuse get regular updates onto what the problem is. Physical? Verbal? Psychological? Remote?

Do what you can to help him. If he REALLY doesn't want your mum to know about it, try and convince him to tell a teacher?

Is the abuse happening during, inbetween or after lessons?

I don't want your sweet lil bruv getting hurt, as inexplicably irritating he can be. He's no worse than I was.

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<Darthmat> I love the taste of meat in my mouth. Cory, I don't know how you live without it.
<Darthmat> "Forbidden meat tastes sweetest."

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11-26-2008 05:49 AM
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Darthmat Offline
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Post: #6
Re: !!!!!!

So tell him to make the other kid stop it. Eat or be eaten.

I highly suggest Mobb Deep's albums The Infamous and Hell on Earth, if you have not listened to it yet.
11-26-2008 06:54 AM
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Milk2Go Offline
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Post: #7
Re: !!!!!!

Step 1: Buy a powerful BB gun.
Step 2: Buy some ammo for aforementioned BB gun.
Step 3: Lure bully to your house, where the BB gun is stored.
Step 4: Once the kid gets to your house, pull out your BB gun and shoot him repeatedly. Extra points if you headshot.
Step 5: ?????
Step 6: PROFIT

That's what my cousin did. That ended his bully problem.
Also, story:
I had a pretty bad bully problem back in 7th grade. At the same time, I also recruited to my friend's airsoft team. I bought an very powerful (720 FPS with 20 gram BBs) and a shitload of ammo. I was getting tired of being bullied all the time, so I invited him to my house and tried to work out some sort of "treaty". Here's how it went:
"Okay, I'm going to give you one last chance to stop bullying me. If you don't, I'm going to have to do something I don't want to do."
"No fucking way, asstard. Is that all you made me come here for?"
"Okay. That's it."
I then pulled out my very powerful airsoft gun, inserted the fully-loaded magazine, looked down the sight, and said, "I'm going to give you five seconds to get the fuck out of my sight before I shoot you."
"You don't have the balls."
One shot fired, right into his chest. He started running for the door. He didn't make it out within 5 seconds. Several more shots were fired, and some hit his head and neck. The next day, he had welts all over his neck and scalp.
I'd do it again, too.
11-26-2008 10:45 AM
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John Tuttle Offline
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Post: #8
Re: !!!!!!

BobManPerson Wrote:Step 1: Buy a powerful BB gun.
Step 2: Buy some ammo for aforementioned BB gun.
Step 3: Lure bully to your house, where the BB gun is stored.
Step 4: Once the kid gets to your house, pull out your BB gun and shoot him repeatedly. Extra points if you headshot.
Step 5: ?????
Step 6: PROFIT

That's what my cousin did. That ended his bully problem.
Also, story:
I had a pretty bad bully problem back in 7th grade. At the same time, I also recruited to my friend's airsoft team. I bought an very powerful (720 FPS with 20 gram BBs) and a shitload of ammo. I was getting tired of being bullied all the time, so I invited him to my house and tried to work out some sort of "treaty". Here's how it went:
"Okay, I'm going to give you one last chance to stop bullying me. If you don't, I'm going to have to do something I don't want to do."
"No fucking way, asstard. Is that all you made me come here for?"
"Okay. That's it."
I then pulled out my very powerful airsoft gun, inserted the fully-loaded magazine, looked down the sight, and said, "I'm going to give you five seconds to get the fuck out of my sight before I shoot you."
"You don't have the balls."
One shot fired, right into his chest. He started running for the door. He didn't make it out within 5 seconds. Several more shots were fired, and some hit his head and neck. The next day, he had welts all over his neck and scalp.
I'd do it again, too.

WIN. I'm pretty sure thats illegal though. I gues you could alwas say that he assualted you.

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11-26-2008 12:05 PM
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6moredetentions Offline
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Post: #9
Re: !!!!!!

zomg!!!! u shud tie the kid to a tree and spit on him!!!!!!!!!!!
11-26-2008 05:33 PM
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SoulRiser Offline
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Post: #10
Re: !!!!!!

I got bullied. I told my parents, and they told a teacher... and the teacher gathered the bullies together and... pretty much just told them that she was aware of what they were doing. Didn't do jack squat. And they of course gave me hell for telling. Thing is, teachers can't really do much in general unless they're exceptionally wise or something. Most people just phail at handling things like that.

So yeah... just be there for him no matter what. That'll probably help more than anything else. If he has someone to turn to, it should help to make him strong enough that the bully won't be able to hurt him as much.

"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
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11-26-2008 08:53 PM
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Puchiko Offline
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Post: #11
Re: !!!!!!

john tuttle Wrote:
BobManPerson Wrote:Step 1: Buy a powerful BB gun.
Step 2: Buy some ammo for aforementioned BB gun.
Step 3: Lure bully to your house, where the BB gun is stored.
Step 4: Once the kid gets to your house, pull out your BB gun and shoot him repeatedly. Extra points if you headshot.
Step 5: ?????
Step 6: PROFIT

That's what my cousin did. That ended his bully problem.
Also, story:
I had a pretty bad bully problem back in 7th grade. At the same time, I also recruited to my friend's airsoft team. I bought an very powerful (720 FPS with 20 gram BBs) and a shitload of ammo. I was getting tired of being bullied all the time, so I invited him to my house and tried to work out some sort of "treaty". Here's how it went:
"Okay, I'm going to give you one last chance to stop bullying me. If you don't, I'm going to have to do something I don't want to do."
"No fucking way, asstard. Is that all you made me come here for?"
"Okay. That's it."
I then pulled out my very powerful airsoft gun, inserted the fully-loaded magazine, looked down the sight, and said, "I'm going to give you five seconds to get the fuck out of my sight before I shoot you."
"You don't have the balls."
One shot fired, right into his chest. He started running for the door. He didn't make it out within 5 seconds. Several more shots were fired, and some hit his head and neck. The next day, he had welts all over his neck and scalp.
I'd do it again, too.

WIN. I'm pretty sure thats illegal though. I gues you could alwas say that he assualted you.
If he's trespassing on your property... you could actually use a real one without any trouble.

I'll admit it-the US is pretty fucked up, but there are things which I envy you for.

Don't take life so seriously, it isn't permanent.
11-27-2008 12:41 AM
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random_name Offline
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Post: #12
Re: !!!!!!

thanks for all the advice. i showed him this thread (quickly dismissing his question on bb guns, he desnt need to know aboutr them just yet =])

he was amazed at so many people being in the same or a similar situation to his. he doesnt like the overall site, but he says thanks for the advice. we are going round to this kids hoouse today, to talk to him and his parents. will keep you posted o how it goes.

Hidden stuff:
"A 'no' uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a 'yes' merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble." - Mahatma Gandhi

"The irrationality of a thing is no argument against its existence, rather a condition of it."

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
-Ben Franklin

"when I was a kid I used to pray for a bicycle. then I realized that god doesn't work that way. so I stole one and prayed for forgiveness."
"I would rather die for something I believe in than live for anything else."
"What is the task of higher education? To make a man into a machine. What are the means employed? He is taught how to suffer being bored." – F W Nietzsche
[Image: s-event.png]
11-27-2008 02:40 AM
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HeartofShadows Offline
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Post: #13
Re: !!!!!!

Good luck random..
It might be cruel but this world is eat or be eaten.
He will have to fight the kid eventually and if can't beat him by normal means then he'll have to play dirty and use his brain.
A dude I hung out with in high school name jeff got with his mom and made this chain that he used to beat the hell out of the guy who messed with him in defense but then again dumbshit school officials always find ways to fuck up when kids defend themselves. Noo

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11-27-2008 03:10 AM
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Hanny Offline
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Post: #14
Re: !!!!!!

Wow, good luck! Maybe the best way to sort this IS face-to-face.

Tell him hi from me. =]]

[Image: 72eoaf.gif]
<Darthmat> I love the taste of meat in my mouth. Cory, I don't know how you live without it.
<Darthmat> "Forbidden meat tastes sweetest."

Penisometer
8======================================================================o
Conclusion: Still a penis.
11-27-2008 03:20 AM
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