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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.
I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.
I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.
I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.
I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.
Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.
Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.
-SoulRiser
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On the subject of parental power.
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Chrisuru
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On the subject of parental power.
I am basically sick to the back fucking teeth of my parents. Especially my dad.
What I'm about to tell you is just one incident in a lifetime of similar ones.
I go downstairs to make my packed lunch for tomorrow. I'd made a snowman earlier in the day (The first I've ever made, we don't get much snow in England) and I'd put my dad's hat and scarf on it to take some photos, but forgotten to take them off. And I hear him talking about me, to my mum. Something about me 'Not pulling my weight' or something. So I get quite angry and go into the living room, and say that if he has anything to say he can say it to my face.
So he says I've forgotten to do it, as I suspected. But then instead of just telling me to take it off, he goes into a tyrade, telling me that I sepnd all day in front of my computer, that I never do anything to help, and that I act like I 'Resent being part of this family'.
I wanted to yell at him 'Yes, sometimes I do resent it!' (But I didn't, he'd batter me black and blue, he has done before on more than one occasion.) They think I do nothing. OK, so I don't cook the dinner and clean the house, but I do stuff. But when I do, they don't give a fuck. I clean out the dishwasher, clean my pet rabbit's cage, make them coffee, help dad fix his car etc. But they just either don't notice or more likely, don't care.
They always ask me 'What did you do at school?' But not 'How was school?' They care more about me being a lovely perfect kid for the public eye than how I feel inside.
So I spend most of my free time on the computer or reading. So what? Free time is to do what you want with...
What really got me was the last thing he said. 'Don't argue, because I'm always right, and you're always wrong, and don't you forget it.' I mean what the fuck? He treats me more like an object than a person, only caring whether my room is tidy.
I've never had self-coping skills and I feel THIS far from a breakdown. Please SS, help...
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| 02-04-2009 07:27 AM |
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Hanny
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
Hug.
Can I meet your dad? I want to see how much i can piss him off without him saying anything.
Quote:They always ask me 'What did you do at school?' But not 'How was school?'
I get this, too.
Good luck with that knobhead. :waah: 
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<Darthmat> "Forbidden meat tastes sweetest."
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| 02-04-2009 07:49 AM |
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SoulRiser
Site Founder
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
He sounds like the kind of person who will never be satisfied no matter what, even IF you do everything he says. ... I think you'll find http://www.eqi.org very interesting. Lots of info there on the reasons why some parents are so totally fucked up in the head and then take it out on their kids. Your dad sounds like he has LOTS of serious mental issues.... and I think he's a great example of how NOT to be. 
I wish I could actually do something, like go there and kick his ass... but I doubt that'd make him realize what an asshole he's being. ... I'd recommend spending as much time away from him as you possibly can.
Quote:But then instead of just telling me to take it off, he goes into a tyrade, telling me that I sepnd all day in front of my computer, that I never do anything to help, and that I act like I 'Resent being part of this family'.
What sane person wouldn't resent being a part of that family? 
"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
Help & Support - Get help with leaving school, unsupportive parents, and more.
Click here if school makes you depressed or suicidal
Support School Survival on Patreon or Donate Bitcoin Here: 1Q5WCcxWjayniaL92b8GfXBiGdfjmnUNa2
"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide
"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer
EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder
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| 02-05-2009 03:49 AM |
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Chrisuru
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
Thanks Soul, Hannah. And
Quote:I'd recommend spending as much time away from him as you possibly can.
Why do you think I spend so much time on the computer? Online life is much preferable to real life when my ad's around...
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| 02-05-2009 07:10 AM |
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random_name
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
i feel so sorry for you, but i dont think that helps in the slightest. if i can do anything, just call me or IM me, though im also fairly sure you dont want my help =]
dont worry, i know i promised not to do anything about your dad.
![[Image: s-event.png]](http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10701;442/st/20100205/e/Rocky+Horror+Picture+Show/dt/6/k/9821/s-event.png)
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| 02-05-2009 08:15 AM |
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Swift
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
Cheddar Wrote:I am basically sick to the back fucking teeth of my parents. Especially my dad.
What I'm about to tell you is just one incident in a lifetime of similar ones.
I go downstairs to make my packed lunch for tomorrow. I'd made a snowman earlier in the day (The first I've ever made, we don't get much snow in England) and I'd put my dad's hat and scarf on it to take some photos, but forgotten to take them off. And I hear him talking about me, to my mum. Something about me 'Not pulling my weight' or something. So I get quite angry and go into the living room, and say that if he has anything to say he can say it to my face.
So he says I've forgotten to do it, as I suspected. But then instead of just telling me to take it off, he goes into a tyrade, telling me that I sepnd all day in front of my computer, that I never do anything to help, and that I act like I 'Resent being part of this family'.
I wanted to yell at him 'Yes, sometimes I do resent it!' (But I didn't, he'd batter me black and blue, he has done before on more than one occasion.) They think I do nothing. OK, so I don't cook the dinner and clean the house, but I do stuff. But when I do, they don't give a fuck. I clean out the dishwasher, clean my pet rabbit's cage, make them coffee, help dad fix his car etc. But they just either don't notice or more likely, don't care.
They always ask me 'What did you do at school?' But not 'How was school?' They care more about me being a lovely perfect kid for the public eye than how I feel inside.
So I spend most of my free time on the computer or reading. So what? Free time is to do what you want with...
What really got me was the last thing he said. 'Don't argue, because I'm always right, and you're always wrong, and don't you forget it.' I mean what the fuck? He treats me more like an object than a person, only caring whether my room is tidy.
I've never had self-coping skills and I feel THIS far from a breakdown. Please SS, help...
It's ok.
"I heard a joke once. Man goes to doctor says "I'm terribly depressed". Doctor says "I know just what you should do. Poliacci the clown is in town, go see him, you'll be cheered right up." The man bursts into tears. "But Doctor, I am Poliacci." Funny joke. Roll on snare drum. Everyone laugh."
-Rorschach
![[Image: BANANAMAN.gif]](http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii307/benjamillion/BANANAMAN.gif)
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| 02-05-2009 11:30 AM |
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AWOL
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
Your dad's a fucking asshole. So is my dad. We should get 'em together sometime. And run like fuck before whichever country we do it in is destroyed.
But seriously, nice rant and 
![[Image: 9be30a7.png]](http://imgs.xkcd.com/s/9be30a7.png)
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| 02-05-2009 07:30 PM |
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Chrisuru
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
You're all so nice! And lol, that would be very fun to watch. Thanks for the support everyone
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| 02-06-2009 02:52 AM |
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SoulRiser
Site Founder
Posts: 18,240
Joined: Aug 2001
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Given 1978 thank(s) in 1208 post(s)
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
Quote:Why do you think I spend so much time on the computer? Online life is much preferable to real life when my ad's around...
Yeah. Doesn't he bug you when you're on the computer though? I kinda meant actually staying away from the entire house, if at all possible. But whatever works.
"If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them." - Dalai Lama
Help & Support - Get help with leaving school, unsupportive parents, and more.
Click here if school makes you depressed or suicidal
Support School Survival on Patreon or Donate Bitcoin Here: 1Q5WCcxWjayniaL92b8GfXBiGdfjmnUNa2
"Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it." - André Paul Guillaume Gide
"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." - Albert Einstein
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot of beauty that can only be found in the mind of a lunatic." - TheCancer
EIPD - Emotionally Incompetent Parent Disorder
Push Button for Collection of Useful Links:
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| 02-06-2009 06:06 AM |
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Jen
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
I think if you're old enough to be independent and you have enough money to depart from your family, do it. But don't forget that you still have an obligation to them.
I'm almost being treated like that until now by my mum, not sure if my dad is.
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| 02-08-2009 12:52 PM |
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Steven
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
My dad was somewhat like your dad about not doing anything and staying alot on the computer, that untill he bought a laptop for himself. From that day he never bugged me again lol.
How old are you ? And do you get along with your mom ? If you do you could try telling her that your dad is pissing you off. Maybe she can talk to him about it. I remember SoulRiser once told me to write my parents a letter, in which I could write stuff that I couldn't tell them personally. I never tried that yet though...
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| 02-08-2009 08:34 PM |
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returnal
cold like minnesota (brrr!)
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
Cheddar Wrote:I am basically sick to the back fucking teeth of my parents. Especially my dad.
I wanted to yell at him 'Yes, sometimes I do resent it!' (But I didn't, he'd batter me black and blue, he has done before on more than one occasion.) They think I do nothing. OK, so I don't cook the dinner and clean the house, but I do stuff. But when I do, they don't give a fuck. I clean out the dishwasher, clean my pet rabbit's cage, make them coffee, help dad fix his car etc. But they just either don't notice or more likely, don't care.
They always ask me 'What did you do at school?' But not 'How was school?' They care more about me being a lovely perfect kid for the public eye than how I feel inside.
So I spend most of my free time on the computer or reading. So what? Free time is to do what you want with...
What really got me was the last thing he said. 'Don't argue, because I'm always right, and you're always wrong, and don't you forget it.' I mean what the fuck? He treats me more like an object than a person, only caring whether my room is tidy.
I've never had self-coping skills and I feel THIS far from a breakdown. Please SS, help...
God...what a pile of shit. If he has in fact beaten you, shouldn't you report it or something?
Well, dunno what to do to help, but I really hope you can get out of this hellhole your in.
woah dude
dude woah
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| 02-08-2009 10:45 PM |
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Pieman
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
my mom is almost like that. all she cares about is school and never listens to me. I feel bad for you. i hope one day you and your dad can solve your problems.
" I never knew until that moment how bad it could hurt to lose something you never really had. " ~From the television show The Wonder Years
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| 02-09-2009 12:25 AM |
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Chrisuru
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Re: On the subject of parental power.
SoulRiser Wrote:Quote:Why do you think I spend so much time on the computer? Online life is much preferable to real life when my ad's around...
Yeah. Doesn't he bug you when you're on the computer though? I kinda meant actually staying away from the entire house, if at all possible. But whatever works.
He does bug me. A lot. But my computer is the one thing I'll never give up no matter what he does. Stephen Wrote:My dad was somewhat like your dad about not doing anything and staying alot on the computer, that untill he bought a laptop for himself. From that day he never bugged me again lol.
How old are you ? And do you get along with your mom ? If you do you could try telling her that your dad is pissing you off. Maybe she can talk to him about it. I remember SoulRiser once told me to write my parents a letter, in which I could write stuff that I couldn't tell them personally. I never tried that yet though...
I'm 13 and I sort of get along with Mum, but she always sides with dad and is always too tetchy to have a real talk. Jen Wrote:I think if you're old enough to be independent and you have enough money to depart from your family, do it. But don't forget that you still have an obligation to them.
I'm almost being treated like that until now by my mum, not sure if my dad is.
I'm not independant enough yet.
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| 02-09-2009 01:19 AM |
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On the subject of parental power.
