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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.


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A Small Piece of Life Advice
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monkey Away

Posts: 1,830
Joined: Jan 2008
Thanks: 0
Given 26 thank(s) in 17 post(s)
Post: #1
A Small Piece of Life Advice

I have been on this forum to some extent for seven years. A year or so lurking and six registered. While I am not the most known, and never really posted anything creative or important as many other more respected members did, I have came to the realization that looking around most of threads today most of the active posters joined in 2012 or 2013. The point isn't for me to brag about how I am king of the oldfags, (There are many far older) nor is this post even about me. The point is I have been here for ages in internet terms.

I found this site frustrated and angry, some time in middle school Google searching "school sucks" and coming up with this. I found a whole load of like minded people and used this place to vent much of my frustration, and learned I was not as alone as I thought reading about the experiences of others. This forum made up a large part of growing up for me, my days of cruising slow internet and discovering things I was probably too young to be looking at.

I'm not trying to type a life story here, what I really wanted to do was leave some kind of advice. For all my efforts to leave I still come back about every six months for my "final visit". Something keeps drawing me back, but It's time to for me to leave for another part of my life. I would like to direct this advice to those young posters and lurkers, I know you exist.

I would like to present the somewhat pretentious,

A Small Piece of Life Advice

The first thing I have to say is everything in your life will change.

I joined this forum when I was twelve years old, I'm eighteen now. Things aren't just different because I can drive a car and all that shit, my perception of the world and my actions are so far away from what they once were. My political views have reversed, I went from being a bleeding edge atheist to a deist, I went from hating the idea of war to currently joining the military. If you think you want to kill yourself or something like that because your life sucks, let me tell you things will change in your life. Don't act like an idiot because things suck now.

The second thing, your problems are real and your parents probably don't understand you.

As a rule older people don't give a shit about what the young are doing. They don't really think you have any problems and it's a bunch of "back in my day" bullshit. While you may indeed be making stupid decisions, as I did many a time, don't let people blow off your emotions just because you are young. The years I spent in middle school were some of the hardest of my life and honestly I hated everything about my life then. It's not like anyone ever stopped to help me. You are for the most part responsible for trying to take care of your own emotions, so don't hate yourself.

Third thing, you will not discover the purpose of life on a forum post.

For a very long time, for years even, I wondered what I even wanted to do with my life. I had a thought for a long time that one day I might read something, or go somewhere, or do something, and everything would dawn on me. Really how I figured out what I wanted to do was I started running out of options. Just let things go as they are and eventually you will either discover something you would give anything to do, or you run out of options and start doing something to live.

The fourth and final thing, don't take advice that seriously, listen to yourself, and only follow your own direction.

What I mean is don't let people tell you what to do. Not in the sense that you should go set buildings on fire or something like that. I mean don't let people preach a philosophy to you, don't listen to the stupid inspirational quotes plastered on walls, don't listen to motivational speakers, and don't listen to me. I think my advice is good, but if you want to do the opposite, go do it. Only you can decide your own philosophy. When people say "follow your dreams" they mean follow appropriate aspirations assigned to you by your parents or society. You shouldn't be trying to please your parents, you should be trying to please yourself. People love to say you can do anything until they find out exactly what it is you want to do. What I'm saying is FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS. Fuck anyone that tells you what your dreams are. It doesn't matter if your dreams might turn out to be a bad choice in the long run, don't ever lose your passion.

I would rather live a life of passionate failure than a life of success with no passion. If you want to do something just start at it. People will tell you that you don't have a chance to succeed, but more dreams are killed by doubt than failure. Don't doubt what your soul tells you to do.

For the past seven years or so my parents have been pressuring me to go to college. Years of anguish over my grades and keeping up with the expectations of my father. I wanted to join the military, and I knew I had to tell my parents my intentions eventually. Standing in front of them and telling them was one of the hardest things I have done in my life. I had no idea if they would kick me out of the house or not. I had a sleeping bag, a car, and 200 dollars wadded into my pocket. But I had to do it. While I still have a place to stay, and things worked out for the most part, I had to take the risk because I had to follow my dream.

I hope someone might gain something from this. Thanks for the time guys.

Had to move on. Account is dead.
(This post was last modified: 02-17-2014 05:23 PM by monkey.)
02-15-2014 04:01 PM
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 Thanks given by: James Comey , Desu , SoulRiser , Alistoriv , l1qu1d , Sociopath , AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA , Superkamiguru , The man , Rule_BreakerXVIII
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A Small Piece of Life Advice - monkey - 02-15-2014 04:01 PM
A Small Piece of Life Advice - James Comey - 02-15-2014, 04:30 PM
A Small Piece of Life Advice - James Comey - 04-14-2017, 06:10 AM

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