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To everyone who joined these forums at some point, and got discouraged by the negativity and left after a while (or even got literally scared off): I'm sorry.

I wasn't good enough at encouraging people to be kinder, and removing people who refuse to be kind. Encouraging people is hard, and removing people creates conflict, and I hate conflict... so that's why I wasn't better at it.

I was a very, very sensitive teen. The atmosphere of this forum as it is now, if it had existed in 1996, would probably have upset me far more than it would have helped.

I can handle quite a lot of negativity and even abuse now, but that isn't the point. I want to help people. I want to help the people who need it the most, and I want to help people like the 1996 version of me.

I'm still figuring out the best way to do that, but as it is now, these forums are doing more harm than good, and I can't keep running them.

Thank you to the few people who have tried to understand my point of view so far. I really, really appreciate you guys. You are beautiful people.

Everyone else: If after everything I've said so far, you still don't understand my motivations, I think it's unlikely that you will. We're just too different. Maybe someday in the future it might make sense, but until then, there's no point in arguing about it. I don't have the time or the energy for arguing anymore. I will focus my time and energy on people who support me, and those who need help.

-SoulRiser

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Why people do things they don't like.
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liq3 Offline
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Why people do things they don't like.

Disclaimer: This will probably devolve into ranting, or at worse mindless babbling.

It baffles me to this day. Why do people do things they don't benefit from? More so, things that hurt them? I mean, I know we are supposed to give to other people, but we should never give if it will hurt ourselves (well, mostly...an old person dying for a young person is often worth it imo). So, why do people do things they don't want to? That they gain very little from.

Best example is school. Many people get horribly bullied at school. Beaten up and picked on. So why don't they stop going to school? Physically it's not hard at all. So, it's psychological then. Psychologically hard. Why? I mean there could be that fact that they are your parents. You are inherently, by nature, inclined to trust them. They tell you to go to school, so you do. But what about when you realize they might be wrong? But wait. You already know they are wrong. You tell them you are bullied. They do everything they can to help, except the ever so obvious idea of taking you out of school, and homeschooling you.

What about refusing your parents? You might be scared that they will abandon you. Send you to boot camp or juvi maybe. Well that's a fear based reason, and I tell fear never leads to any good. Assuming you went through with it, and did end up in juvi...Well you could tough it out. You will gain huge amounts of self-discipline if you survive. So that's not really a negative. But, I guess this isn't about objectivity, but subjectivity? Yes, I would think so. So, the person might think it's a negative. They'd handle the situation badly. Now that makes me wonder, why are they in the frameset of that?

I guess it goes back to childhood. Before they even went to school. What was that like? I'm not sure. Maybe they saw their parents getting ordered by and obeying their parents. Maybe they witnessed their parents stuck in a struggle that is easy to escape, but their parents don't? So they emulate this behavior. They copy what their parents do. Maybe that's it... Hrm...

tl;dr version: Please don't post in this thread :D.

Epic win book.
Personal Development for Smart People.
07-28-2008 04:03 AM
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Why people do things they don't like. - liq3 - 07-28-2008 04:03 AM
Why people do things they don't like. - Ky - 03-10-2013, 11:24 AM

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