Hello everyone

[Cianna200]

This will certainly be my last day on the forum, and I didn't even give a proper goodbye. I just want to thank you all for everything, for your advice, your welcoming arms, and even if some of you seem to have obnoxious personalities, at least It gave me something to think about. Especially to you Soulriser, your the best. I also have not very good news which came as a huge shock on me. I have already told you all that my grandfather died from cancer last year in the summer, but months later, my grandmother has been getting sick too, I had to take care of her as well, but her illness was more serious than any of us had ever imagined. I had to watch the ambulance remove her from the house, and hear her cries, it was so sad. I was sick of hearing her cries of physical pain, they were agonizing. She has been in the hospital for a few months. She missed Christmas, and my birthday (which was Monday) but yesterday, I received the bad news that she has lung cancer and will follow my grandfather to the grave. Crazy huh? I already dealt with the emotional turmoil of my grandfather dying and now they're telling me my grandmother will die too?! I have already told you that my grandmother is notorious for being so cruel and unloving to me (my entire life) and some other people. Some people will probably see me as having some sense of relief that she's passing because I won't have to feel pain and anger everyday because of her. But, I don't know.
The only good news is that She will be with her husband again, and it's bittersweet. But I feel so emotionally troubled and bad for her, the pain she's in. I just want it to be over already. After she passes it will be just me and my sisters, and our dog, the house will be ours. My youngest sister doesn't know, she thinks she's coming home. I don't know how to tell her that she's not. I also feel terrible for the hate I spewed at my grandmother too. Sorry about the sad atmosphere, especially since I am now leaving the forums forever.

[the Analogist]

I think I speak for many here when I say, please stop by and let us know how you are doing! You've got a lot of responsibility to shoulder.

I'd like to think that perhaps somebody reading these forums has benefited from my success story, being an unemployed and abusive father/husband who eventually got himself and his house together. It wasn't easy. I had to learn to dock my emotions to do what I needed. I had to learn to dock my own anxiety and do just enough to keep myself feeling responsible. Just like how an employed person shouldn't let work interfere with family, so too should looking for work not interfere with family.

I've learned you are what you do. If you want to be a person who has it together, do the things somebody who has it together does, and eventually you will have it together. Feel free to PM me if help in this regard doesn't belong on a public forum.

People are frequently capable of far more than they realize, so I am sure you will make it, and I for one would like to hear about it when you do!

[SoulRiser]

I'll miss you!

I want to say thanks for mentioning stuff about asexuality over here, it's actually because of you that I looked it up and learned a lot about myself. And I hope everything works out well for you guys.